women who want to want

[energeia5]

Interesting article in the NYT regarding current sexology research on women with low sexual desire. Actually, one of the most interesting things, imo, is the discussion about rewriting this section of the DSMV. Another interesting part is the discussion about when/how desire arises

Comments

[akuyura]

Were you raised in an extremely sexually repressed background?

My genii told me that when one perceived anything concerning sexuality to be taboo throughout the formative years, it can lead to a host of other problems later in life. I also think societal double standards inflicted on girls might have been one cause that women become unaware of their own sexual feelings.

[whitewalling]

I don't think I could walk through life being unaware of my sexual feelings even if I tried. Their presence were not something which I could dissociate from. I wonder if this is a function of libido strength (though I don't think I have an extreme sex drive), psychological makeup, self-awareness...

Also I think that opposite ends of the spectrum of normality get pathologised in negative and often misogynistic ways - frigid (and why should any woman be readily available for consumption) vs. slutty (sex is natural like eating and drinking... some have bigger appetites). Having either very low or very high sex drives is nothing to be ashamed of.

BTW - 'genii'?

[akuyura]

*genii* is something I used to explain the lightbulb that goes off around my head :p

I am very aware of my sexual feelings here. Though taking action is a completely different thing altogether....I just wonder if something that has constrained me *in action* could apply on a more mental level for some others.

[akuyura]

I mean...I couldn't flirt even if I wanted to, even badly so. I froze...and on the rare instances that I took the initiative usually the effect is completely unnatural, and the other party was very aware of it.