Circle | Ryan/Alex | Pg
Title: Circle
Author: emmyatthedisco
Rating: Pg
Pairing: Ryan/Alex, background Brendon/Spencer
POV: 3rd, Ryan
Summary: The going to the beach was Alex’s idea
Disclaimer:I don't own the boys, but the fiction is my own.
Beta: afterxbirth <3
Author Notes: I actually wrote this one a while ago. I'd planned on making it longer, but that didn't end up happening, and I like the way it ends here. Post-split fic, but there's not a hell of a lot of angst so... happy outlook fic, anyone?
The going to the beach was Alex’s idea.
Ryan, for his part, had been avoiding the coast as much as he could. He was never much of a swimmer, hadn’t been drawn to the water like Brendon and Spencer had once they finally got out of Vegas. And now... well, the coast had felt like it was off limits for a while. That it was BrendonandSpencer’s, like he’d lost it in a custody battle he didn’t even know he’d fought. He was trying to push past that though, reaching out tentatively to see if there was still a place for him in their lives. (There was, of course there was. They always took him back if he wanted to come back.)
It wasn’t a beach they’d be on, not a chance, it was on wrong side of the state. The sound of crashing waves brought back conversations though, whispered over the phone, like they were afraid that if they spoke too loudly this fragile connection they’d managed to rebuild would just... shatter apart again. Looking out at the waves he remembers Spencer telling him about Brendon learning to surf, Brendon telling him about the first time he and Spencer kissed, the waves crashing around them.
Ryan had to admit he was happy for them. He’d watched them dance around each other for years, and he could hear the change in both their voices now. They sounded happier, surer of themselves. He figured they’d probably come out soon, either on purpose or accidentally. It wasn’t like Brendon hadn’t been trying to come out for years. He couldn’t help the twinges in his gut, that it had taken him leaving for them to come together. But... he was getting over it.
Still, he couldn’t look out at the waves without hearing their voices. He felt Alex’s fingers brush the side of his neck gently as they hauled their gear out of the car and he knew the real reason Alex had suggested this trip. It was a type of closure and they both knew it. Ryan needed to come to terms with what he still had and didn’t have from his life in Panic, before he could really get his head into the new band.
Alex smiled at him, grabbing a towel and the backpack they’d thrown what food they could find from the cupboard in. “You’re not going to swim, are you?” he asked teasingly, eyeing Ryan’s vintage trousers and button down shirt.
Ryan grinned back, always surprised how easy it was to be happy around Alex. It had always been like that, back to the days of the Honda Civic Tour. “I might go skinny dipping later,” Ryan said in a monotone, and Alex wiggled his eyebrows appreciatively.
“Hmmm, let me know when you do that,” he said, tapping Ryan lightly on the ass before heading out to the beach. Ryan couldn’t help but grin after him.
He liked were he was now, liked the music he was making and the people he was with. It stung that it looked for a while like it came at the price of Brendon and Spencer, but he knew now that it didn’t have too. He’d never regretted the decision, but he could feel a small piece of the weight resting on his chest chip away every time he got on the phone with one of them.
“Leave your emo in the car and get your ass over here, Ross!” Alex called, and Ryan laughed, jogging down to the beach to catch up.
Apparently there was some kind of trick involved in finding the perfect place to set up on the beach, one that Alex was well versed in. Ryan just tagged along behind him, ignoring the older man’s teasing remarks about Ryan being a “desert kid”. He may have attempted to kick some sand at Alex in retaliation, but more of the sand was getting into his shoes than anywhere else.
Eventually Alex located his opportune beach stop, a little outcropping of rocks hiding the spot on both sides. “So I can sex you up without anyone else knowing,” he explained to Ryan, who rolled his eyes. The snappy retort was lost on his tongue though, when Alex leaned in to give him a playful little kiss.
Alex pulled away, cackling at what Ryan could only imagine was the slightly dazed look on his face. “Where’s your snappy wit, oh sarcastic one?”
Ryan narrowed his eyes into a glare, attempting to kick more sand at Alex. “Fuck you.”
“Hmmm, later,” Alex said absently, turning away to spread the towels out in the sand. He then promptly began to strip, working his way down to his leopard print swim trucks. Ryan stared shamelessly at the trunks then rolled his eyes, just on principle. Then maybe stared shamelessly some more. Setting to work on peeling his own shirt of, Ryan nudged off his shoes and socks as well.
“Alright, so, need some spf 90 for my pretty pretty princess,” Alex muttered, digging through the bag and Ryan scowled at him. He accepted the tube Alex handed him, pausing to whack the older man on the head with it before squiring the white liquid onto his skin.
“Will you do me?” Ryan asked, indicating the broad plains of his back devoid of sun screen.
Alex snickered, wrapping his arms around Ryan from behind and whispered “You know I’ll always do you, babe,” in his ear. Ryan couldn’t help but blush a little, but he did manage to bite back the goofy smile. Alex always made him feel like a 13 year old girl.
“Yeah, not on a public beach,” Ryan managed, though it didn’t sound as scathing as he would have liked. He waved the sun tan lotion in Alex’s face, and the older man laughed, releasing him to take the lotion.
Ryan sighed, relaxing as Alex set to work rubbing the sun screen into his skin. He let his mind drift, objectively noting that he liked the way Alex’s hands felt on his back. Not that liking Alex’s touch was anything particularly unusual, but that didn’t stop him from leaning back into it happily.
“There you go princess,” Alex said, and Ryan could practically hear the grin in his voice. Alex kissed the side of his neck before moving away though, and Ryan thought maybe he could forgive him.
Ryan settled himself down onto the towel, watching with what he refused to call an affectionate smile as Alex took of towards the water, belly flopping in as soon as he was deep enough. He came up soaking wet and turned to grin at Ryan, who just grinned back.
He let time slip away from him as he watched Alex goof off in the surf. The sun warmed his skin, making him feel drowsy. Almost without thinking, he drew out his phone, typing a text. I’m at the beach He selected Brendon’s name also without thinking about it, but hesitated before sending. Ryan looked out at the ocean, and where Alex’s head was bobbing in the water, harassing some sea gulls. He hit send.
The reply came back quickly. lucky! im in studio. wanna SUUUURF! Ryan smiled, and rested his head on his arms, eyes slipping shut.
Author: emmyatthedisco
Rating: Pg
Pairing: Ryan/Alex, background Brendon/Spencer
POV: 3rd, Ryan
Summary: The going to the beach was Alex’s idea
Disclaimer:I don't own the boys, but the fiction is my own.
Beta: afterxbirth <3
Author Notes: I actually wrote this one a while ago. I'd planned on making it longer, but that didn't end up happening, and I like the way it ends here. Post-split fic, but there's not a hell of a lot of angst so... happy outlook fic, anyone?
The going to the beach was Alex’s idea.
Ryan, for his part, had been avoiding the coast as much as he could. He was never much of a swimmer, hadn’t been drawn to the water like Brendon and Spencer had once they finally got out of Vegas. And now... well, the coast had felt like it was off limits for a while. That it was BrendonandSpencer’s, like he’d lost it in a custody battle he didn’t even know he’d fought. He was trying to push past that though, reaching out tentatively to see if there was still a place for him in their lives. (There was, of course there was. They always took him back if he wanted to come back.)
It wasn’t a beach they’d be on, not a chance, it was on wrong side of the state. The sound of crashing waves brought back conversations though, whispered over the phone, like they were afraid that if they spoke too loudly this fragile connection they’d managed to rebuild would just... shatter apart again. Looking out at the waves he remembers Spencer telling him about Brendon learning to surf, Brendon telling him about the first time he and Spencer kissed, the waves crashing around them.
Ryan had to admit he was happy for them. He’d watched them dance around each other for years, and he could hear the change in both their voices now. They sounded happier, surer of themselves. He figured they’d probably come out soon, either on purpose or accidentally. It wasn’t like Brendon hadn’t been trying to come out for years. He couldn’t help the twinges in his gut, that it had taken him leaving for them to come together. But... he was getting over it.
Still, he couldn’t look out at the waves without hearing their voices. He felt Alex’s fingers brush the side of his neck gently as they hauled their gear out of the car and he knew the real reason Alex had suggested this trip. It was a type of closure and they both knew it. Ryan needed to come to terms with what he still had and didn’t have from his life in Panic, before he could really get his head into the new band.
Alex smiled at him, grabbing a towel and the backpack they’d thrown what food they could find from the cupboard in. “You’re not going to swim, are you?” he asked teasingly, eyeing Ryan’s vintage trousers and button down shirt.
Ryan grinned back, always surprised how easy it was to be happy around Alex. It had always been like that, back to the days of the Honda Civic Tour. “I might go skinny dipping later,” Ryan said in a monotone, and Alex wiggled his eyebrows appreciatively.
“Hmmm, let me know when you do that,” he said, tapping Ryan lightly on the ass before heading out to the beach. Ryan couldn’t help but grin after him.
He liked were he was now, liked the music he was making and the people he was with. It stung that it looked for a while like it came at the price of Brendon and Spencer, but he knew now that it didn’t have too. He’d never regretted the decision, but he could feel a small piece of the weight resting on his chest chip away every time he got on the phone with one of them.
“Leave your emo in the car and get your ass over here, Ross!” Alex called, and Ryan laughed, jogging down to the beach to catch up.
Apparently there was some kind of trick involved in finding the perfect place to set up on the beach, one that Alex was well versed in. Ryan just tagged along behind him, ignoring the older man’s teasing remarks about Ryan being a “desert kid”. He may have attempted to kick some sand at Alex in retaliation, but more of the sand was getting into his shoes than anywhere else.
Eventually Alex located his opportune beach stop, a little outcropping of rocks hiding the spot on both sides. “So I can sex you up without anyone else knowing,” he explained to Ryan, who rolled his eyes. The snappy retort was lost on his tongue though, when Alex leaned in to give him a playful little kiss.
Alex pulled away, cackling at what Ryan could only imagine was the slightly dazed look on his face. “Where’s your snappy wit, oh sarcastic one?”
Ryan narrowed his eyes into a glare, attempting to kick more sand at Alex. “Fuck you.”
“Hmmm, later,” Alex said absently, turning away to spread the towels out in the sand. He then promptly began to strip, working his way down to his leopard print swim trucks. Ryan stared shamelessly at the trunks then rolled his eyes, just on principle. Then maybe stared shamelessly some more. Setting to work on peeling his own shirt of, Ryan nudged off his shoes and socks as well.
“Alright, so, need some spf 90 for my pretty pretty princess,” Alex muttered, digging through the bag and Ryan scowled at him. He accepted the tube Alex handed him, pausing to whack the older man on the head with it before squiring the white liquid onto his skin.
“Will you do me?” Ryan asked, indicating the broad plains of his back devoid of sun screen.
Alex snickered, wrapping his arms around Ryan from behind and whispered “You know I’ll always do you, babe,” in his ear. Ryan couldn’t help but blush a little, but he did manage to bite back the goofy smile. Alex always made him feel like a 13 year old girl.
“Yeah, not on a public beach,” Ryan managed, though it didn’t sound as scathing as he would have liked. He waved the sun tan lotion in Alex’s face, and the older man laughed, releasing him to take the lotion.
Ryan sighed, relaxing as Alex set to work rubbing the sun screen into his skin. He let his mind drift, objectively noting that he liked the way Alex’s hands felt on his back. Not that liking Alex’s touch was anything particularly unusual, but that didn’t stop him from leaning back into it happily.
“There you go princess,” Alex said, and Ryan could practically hear the grin in his voice. Alex kissed the side of his neck before moving away though, and Ryan thought maybe he could forgive him.
Ryan settled himself down onto the towel, watching with what he refused to call an affectionate smile as Alex took of towards the water, belly flopping in as soon as he was deep enough. He came up soaking wet and turned to grin at Ryan, who just grinned back.
He let time slip away from him as he watched Alex goof off in the surf. The sun warmed his skin, making him feel drowsy. Almost without thinking, he drew out his phone, typing a text. I’m at the beach He selected Brendon’s name also without thinking about it, but hesitated before sending. Ryan looked out at the ocean, and where Alex’s head was bobbing in the water, harassing some sea gulls. He hit send.
The reply came back quickly. lucky! im in studio. wanna SUUUURF! Ryan smiled, and rested his head on his arms, eyes slipping shut.