On Pain, Punishment and Perverse Incentives

[emanix]

I am not a brat.

I tend to keep my submissive streak rather quiet. Partly because it's very very rare that it comes out. I have gone most of thirty years and only been submissive for a few days of that, at most. Partly because I see the lack of respect towards submissives in certain parts of the kink scene and perhaps a bit selfishly, to avoid

Comments

[lovelybug]

*nods* interesting thoughts

[lovelybug]

Reading back I wonder if this sounds like I think 'topping from bottom' in scene always bad, which I definitely don't!

[pir]

Makes sense to me, particularly also being a switch whose subby side very rarely comes out... though I'm also more of a sadist than masochist.

[world_rim_walke]

I'm reminded of a joke. A masochist says to a sadist "Hurt me" and the sadist says "no".

I've fortunately never encountered or before heard of that sort of misbehaving or brattery. I've only ever heard of one instance of actual disrespectful actions towards a sub, but I get the impression there were other problems in that relationship.

I did speak with a domme about her and her husband's subs, and she didn't consider what they, meaning her and her husband, did to them, meaning the subs, to be punishment. It was reward, and I think punishment was something like making them sit in a corner.

I'm also not as active in my community as you are in yours, so there is a difference in the groups sampled and number of samples.

I guess it's a good thing that I enjoyed the essay, as I'm not in range to spank you anyway.

[baby_rissa_chan]

I've been thinking about this off and on throughout the day, trying to gauge where I lie in relation to what you're saying, and my basic conclusion is this