This is such a searching examination of desire and the need to be desired--the closing paragraphs in particular are so moving, about the lies we tell ourselves to avoid pain, and the sadness of hoping for oblivion to replace pain. Very moving.
Thank you. I was looking to evoke a sympathetic emotional reaction from the reader with this piece, and the feedback indicates I was rather successful in that regard. My first draft was significantly rougher, though, and I seriously doubted that it could be salvaged into something worth posting. I am extremely grateful to my team mates for both assuring me that the first draft did have great bones and for giving me concrit to make it better. Oddly enough, a couple of them told that I should *ADD* more details, and that apparently did help make the piece more interesting... though I did also trim some bits that I realized were completely unnecessary.
Oh wow. This was so well done! It gives cause for a lot of reflection, as how we all interact, romance, dancing, and "dancing," are all things most adults have experienced. So since readers will relate to it, I think it's natural that readers will also reflect on how it corresponds to their own experiences.
Also, being someone who has never, ever understood games that people play, I didn't even know girls used to (and even may still?) do that thing where the offer to pretend date is really an offer to really date. Whoa. I'm kind of glad I'm so clueless in this arena. I like to live in the "say what you mean and mean what you say" kind of life philosophy, though I get that young kids are just experimenting with how to approach these things, and it's harder when you're shy, or aren't supposed to be too forward, or something.
Dude. Welcome to being a guy. Most of the fellas I know could have probably written this themselves just as easily. It's not just you, man. It's not just you. Whatever signals you think you may or may not be reading, they're probably mixed, anyway. Women are confusing. Plain and simple. End of story.
Sorry to hear about the plumbing issues, but you seem nearly at peace about it, so good for you. You wouldn't believe it to look at most of the world, but it really isn't everything that matters in life. To a large degree, you're in a much better position to live a richer, more fulfilling life without trying to focus so much of it on dancing. Live the life you want, be honest with yourself, true to your nature, and surround yourself with people who accept you as you are. This is your best shot at genuine happiness. ;)
Most of the fellas I know could have probably written this themselves just as easily.
I'm hoping that sense of familiarity made the emotional aspects of the piece resonate with you, as opposed to seeming trite.
Sorry to hear about the plumbing issues.
I am glad to find that you found the piece to be convincing as apparent non-fiction. But in truth, I'm going to continue to leave my readership guessing as to whether I really have that problem or if I made it all up.
I sincerely thank you for your comment, and appreciate the support.
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There's a small part of me that's slightly miffed at how you're only just realizing that now... but only a very small part. ;)
Seriously though: I am deeply honored and flattered by your comments. Thank you so much.
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Thanks so much for your feedback!
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Also, being someone who has never, ever understood games that people play, I didn't even know girls used to (and even may still?) do that thing where the offer to pretend date is really an offer to really date. Whoa. I'm kind of glad I'm so clueless in this arena. I like to live in the "say what you mean and mean what you say" kind of life philosophy, though I get that young kids are just experimenting with how to approach these things, and it's harder when you're shy, or aren't supposed to be too forward, or something.
Anyway, this was wonderfully done!
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Sorry to hear about the plumbing issues, but you seem nearly at peace about it, so good for you. You wouldn't believe it to look at most of the world, but it really isn't everything that matters in life. To a large degree, you're in a much better position to live a richer, more fulfilling life without trying to focus so much of it on dancing. Live the life you want, be honest with yourself, true to your nature, and surround yourself with people who accept you as you are. This is your best shot at genuine happiness. ;)
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I'm hoping that sense of familiarity made the emotional aspects of the piece resonate with you, as opposed to seeming trite.
Sorry to hear about the plumbing issues.
I am glad to find that you found the piece to be convincing as apparent non-fiction. But in truth, I'm going to continue to leave my readership guessing as to whether I really have that problem or if I made it all up.
I sincerely thank you for your comment, and appreciate the support.
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(Or so I've been told.)
Seriously.. I miss all the signs.
And, honestly, I hate dating anyway, so stopping has done me no harm.
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Thanks for the feedback!
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It all felt very true. Especially as someone struggling with (and lately losing the fight with) diabetes.
I have days... weeks of really good behavior and everything is good, and then there's this week...
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