(More) reasons to be a feminist. Kinda rambly.

Nov 15, 2007 18:46

I happened to check out the Guardian today, and this blog post got my attention. The news hook to it is a study about feminism and heterosexual relationships ( Read more... )

self-image, sexual politics, relationships, feminism, sex, gender issues

Leave a comment

Comments 32

wendykh November 16 2007, 00:10:24 UTC
I have to say that in my younger years particularly, I wasted far too much mental and emotional energy on Relationships. I am thinking in the teen years. I should have been focused on getting good grades and into a good college and earning scholarships. Instead I paid enough attention to get by when I could have been a national merit scholar and Obsessing About Boys. I also share a trait, despite considering myself to have feminist ideals, with many of my women friends in that if my personal life is fucked up, I cannot concentrate on anything else. I have to solve that like now. Meanwhile, if my personal life is going well, I excel in work and academics. The opposite is true for many men I know.

I think one reason feminists may have better relationships is they are likely to SAY "this is not working, this needs to work this way" and talk about what they actually need in a relationship instead of putting up with crap. That goes for both genders by the by.

Reply

dzuunmod November 16 2007, 00:18:42 UTC
Meanwhile, if my personal life is going well, I excel in work and academics. The opposite is true for many men I know.

Why do you think it's so for men? Also, I agree lots with your last point.

Reply

wendykh November 16 2007, 00:25:11 UTC
Sociological stuff. Women are brought up that their utmost priority is to be in a relationship and doing well in it, men are brought up their first priority is to make money and excel professionally. Of course there are exceptions but I don't think it is possible to deny this sociological construct exists.

Reply

dzuunmod November 16 2007, 01:38:37 UTC
Oh, I totally agree, but what I meant was why do you think that when men have shitty personal lives, their professional lives necessarily improve? (Unless I'm misreading...)

Reply


inever November 16 2007, 00:16:42 UTC
I am afraid that my opinions on Feminism in heterosexual relationships will be steeped in my discontent at the state of Feminism within my own "heterosexual" relationship ( ... )

Reply

dzuunmod November 16 2007, 00:22:59 UTC
I'm not necessarily coming down on this one way or the other (that would be for another post, I guess), but do you support the idea that men are "allowed" to have their own spaces, too?

It's an issue I'm really torn on, but I do know for sure that I believe this: If any one, single group (gays, Pakistanis, men, tall people) is allowed to form organizations or is allowed to open businesses or is allowed to create institutions that discriminate against people who are not members of that group, then every group needs to have that right.

Reply

wendykh November 16 2007, 00:37:23 UTC
I am not the original poster, but just to share... I think guys spending time together and nurturing one another as men is vital, to be sincere. I don't find a lot of guys who get together (especially once paired off) to just, hang and be boyz so to speak. Sometimes I think it would really help if guys could get together and be honest and male without having to censor themselves for women ( ... )

Reply

wendykh November 16 2007, 00:40:11 UTC
and just to throw some oil on the fire, I think the dilution of people's issues, whether through the erasure of the Concordia Women's Centre becoming "anyone but straight males centre" or GLBTQ conglomerations that dilute the uniqueness of certain groups, or "multicultural centres" which are really "anyone not caucasian" centres is really sad.

Reply


lupinlover November 16 2007, 00:40:06 UTC
technically, a feminist is someone who believes in equal rights for men and women or that they're equal, one of the two. Anyway, it's all about equality. So I'd hope there are male feminists out there :D

Reply

bee_york November 16 2007, 01:01:37 UTC
I agree with this. :)

Reply

dzuunmod November 16 2007, 01:46:59 UTC
Hey, you're preaching to the choir. But I am aware that there are dissenters, and I basically just said what I said to prevent this post from getting railroaded into talking about that. :)

Reply


bee_york November 16 2007, 01:05:44 UTC
I didn't read the whole thing (^^;;;!), but, I just wanna say, I think it's too bad that feminists get a bad rep due to the "feminazis" who tend to hate men. As in with ANY group, there's a few bad apples who taint the others. I'm going to agree 100% with lupinlover's definition of a feminist and say that it's someone who believes women and men should be equal. Unfortunately, there are some who believe that women are superior to men (and not in a joking or friendly way) and put down men and are basically male-bashers. This attitude is not helpful to the progression of women's position in society and is part of the reason why so many well-meaning feminists get a bad rep and are considered to be bitches, which is completely unfair.

Reply

dzuunmod November 16 2007, 01:48:06 UTC
I didn't read the whole thing (^^;;;!)

Sometimes the writer in me comes out, is all. ;)

So, do you consider yourself a feminist?

Reply


thepersona November 16 2007, 08:55:00 UTC
I'm always critical of these kinds of studies, because they rely on human input, and humans always lie.

They also imply, when two things are found to correlate, that one causes the other, sometimes with no evidence whatsoever.

In this case, for example, what's to show that it's not the other way around: Women who have good sex are more likely to think their men are feminists?

Reply


Leave a comment

Up