(More) reasons to be a feminist. Kinda rambly.

[dzuunmod]

I happened to check out the Guardian today, and this blog post got my attention. The news hook to it is a study about feminism and heterosexual relationships

Comments

[wendykh]

I am not the original poster, but just to share... I think guys spending time together and nurturing one another as men is vital, to be sincere. I don't find a lot of guys who get together (especially once paired off) to just, hang and be boyz so to speak. Sometimes I think it would really help if guys could get together and be honest and male without having to censor themselves for women.

I am wishy washy on stuff like a men's only space. Partially because the reason we need women's stuff is due to the fact men, particularly white men, tend to just, by sociological construct and not necessarily through fault of anyone, dominate space by design. I mean have you ever seen a "Tools for Minorities Working for Social Change" kind of flyer? (See http://www.xyonline.net/tools.shtml for what I mean.) No, because they don't NEED one.

That said, as a mother of a son, I hate stuff like "boys are stupid" pins. No it's not fucking funny and no I don't need a sense of humour.

I do however, believe in "men's issues" particularly as it relates to parenting young men in training. It is really okay to let your boys play with guns, have war play, wear blue, and you need not fret if they behead the ethnically diverse and anatomically ambiguous doll you got for him to nurture.

Here are two of my favourite boy raising books.
http://www.amazon.ca/Real-Boys-Rescuing-Myths-Boyhood/dp/0805061835/ref=pd_sim_b_img_4/105-8206304-3316403
http://www.amazon.ca/Whos-Calling-Shots-Effectively-Fascination/dp/0865711658/ref=sr_na_2/702-5812163-2296036?ie=UTF8&qid=1195173286&sr=1-2

(the latter is about children in general, but let's face it, boys are generally more interested in war play and the authors do discuss this)

[wendykh]

and just to throw some oil on the fire, I think the dilution of people's issues, whether through the erasure of the Concordia Women's Centre becoming "anyone but straight males centre" or GLBTQ conglomerations that dilute the uniqueness of certain groups, or "multicultural centres" which are really "anyone not caucasian" centres is really sad.

[wendykh]

and damn I am chatty... you can read the first few pages here, and I have to say it breaks my damn heart how many men I know who relate waaaaay too well to the story of "Adam." That really fucks a guy up.

[dzuunmod]

I do however, believe in "men's issues" particularly as it relates to parenting young men in training. It is really okay to let your boys play with guns, have war play, wear blue, and you need not fret if they behead the ethnically diverse and anatomically ambiguous doll you got for him to nurture.

I'd love to see this expanded, if you have the time/interest.

[wendykh]

Well, I think to pretend there are not issues directly affecting the parenting of men in training and facing men in general (how confusing to be a man today, when some women get offended if you open the door and some get offended if you do not!) not to mention health issues (wtf is with so many boys being on ADHD meds? Seriously. not to mention the push with viagra... wtf why are healthy young men with perfectly normal erections and refractory time taking viagra?) and such is being really obtuse. Patriarchy has not been good to men either, and to pretend they do not suffer from it is ...well... being obtuse!

[sultrysong]

Also as the mom of a son, I loved this book:
http://www.amazon.com/Killing-Monsters-Children-Make-Believe-Violence/dp/0465036953