[Human!TF] Candy Hearts and Roses Day

[dytabytes]

Title: Organic Life (Issue 8)- Candy Hearts and Roses Day
Fandom: Transformers
Characters: Wheeljack/Ratchet, Elita/Optimus, Chromia/Ironhide, Bluestreak, Sunstreaker, Sideswipe, Firestar/Red Alert/Inferno, Skyfire/Starscream
Rating: R for implied sex
General Summary: It's my deranged human!TF AU where there are no wars, giant robots, or giant

Comments

[systemscrash]

Damn, Toast! This is so freaking precious. (And in some cases sexy, hahaha.)

God I can just imagine Wheeljack's adorable pancakes, and Mr. Grumpybutt's corresponding hug... and the very girly giggle.

Optimus isn't getting any more whipped than that, though Elita giving him roses is about the sweetest thing I've ever heard of.

Ironhide's accent getting more prevalent as he gets angry is a fantastic touch... CHROMIA YOU FOX YOU.

Sunny's a traitor. No lies. TRAITOR.

...Hey! Wrong hole! WRONG HOLE." JUST. YES. I laughed so hard.

Oh goodness. What have you gotten yourself into THIS time Starscream. YOU FOUL MOUTHED BOY, YOU. This one was a surprise, Haha.

STOP BEIN' COOL TOAST. >:/

[dytabytes]

OBVIUSLY I SHOULD WRITE MORE OFTEN AT 3 IN THE MORNING. BECAUSE THAT'S WHEN ALL THE GOOD STUFF SEEMS TO HAVE BEEN WRITTEN. HOLY SHIT MY BRAIN'S GONNA DIE

[systemscrash]

TOAST YOU'RE ALWAYS COOL, STFU. 3 AM IS JUST A TIME OF DAY. IN, LIKE, CHINA IT WAS NOONTIME OR SOMETHING ANYWAY.

Wheeljack would be a bad housewife on the WHOLE. I mean, the cooking would be fantastic, BUT HE'D BLOW UP THE VACUUM ALL THE TIME. THat would be VERY BAD.

Elita wears the pants in that relationship. End of story. I bet Optimus gets teased endlessly about it too.

ALL I KNOW IS THAT I WOULD SPANK THAT TEACHER ANY DAY. She's a MILF to the extreme. And poor Ironhide, DEFEAT THOSE STEROTYPES. YOU CAN DO IT. ...I bet when his daughters get married he's on the verge of tears, and he gets a REALLY THINK accent going. AWWW. WHY CAN'T I STOP IT WITH THE FAMILY STUFF.

Firestar's a superhero for it anyway. NOTHING WOULD BE WORSE THAN THE WRONG HOLE AT A BAD TIME.

...NOW I WANT MORE OF THIS. FUCK TOAST.

STOP EMOING YOU CRAZY WHORE I'LL RAPE SOME HAPPY INTO YOU.

[dytabytes]

... >> ... << ... He actually can't blow the vacuum up beacuse.. um... he turned it into Sludge the dinobot. So uh... yeeeeeeeeesssssssss...

Optimus gets teased, but he's in wuuuuuuv. He likes having a girl who stands up to him. Such a nice change of pace XD

WHEN IRONHIDE'S GIRLS GET MARRIED HE WILL BE COMPLETELY IMPOSSIBLE TO UNDERSTAND UNLESS YOU HAPPEN TO BE OPTIMUS, CHROMIA OR ONE OF THE OTHER O'HARAS. THAT'S JUST THE WAY THINGS ARE. And... you don't spank Chromia. CHROMIA SPANKS YOU. XDDD

;3 Firestar and Starscream... does this mean that pairing's Firescream? Damn. That's one hell of a name to live up to XDD

OH NOES. MY POOR VAG.

[akastreakychan]

I aww'd. And then I lol'd big time because of "WRONG HOLE."

Ironhide's accent coming out as he gets pissed is nothing short of brilliant. And, you know, everything about Starscream is. Because he's Starscream. I need to start thinking up things to type when I've just woken up. D:

[dytabytes]

X3 I am so happy you liked it. To tell the truth, oroiginally, Ratch and Wheeljack's scene was going to be the 'holy shit, there's four people in this bed' thing. But then it got waaaay too complicated because four voices in a dialogue piece = very confusing. I've got big ideas for it, though. For some reason, it's easier to write people porn than it is to write it for TFs. Hmmm >>;

Chromia loves it. Is very sexeh ;D

And don't worry, typing in morning is difficult. Is okay. To be honest, I wasn't expecting you to be around =O!

[akastreakychan]

The four-person thing would have been funny, but their scene was amazing anyway, and really cute with just those two.

Does your life at least partially revolve around the writing of porn? Because if it does, that rocks. XD

I've been sneaking online here and there. I wrote that comment when my friend was off in math class with her crazy Russian teacher and I was waiting for her to come back.

[dytabytes]

I may attempt it one day. I've got Ratchet's voice and Liz's pretty well down, I think. They're both more calm, but Ratchet uses big words, whereas Liz speaks like a 'normal' person. It's just that Jinn and Wheeljack come out to sounding like the same person talking twice as much. Because their speaking styles are, to me, very similar in that high-contraction, low-sense, innocently childish sort of way. I have to work it out =p

Uh... it looks that way, doesn't it? Maybe I should just give up on medicine and just churn out smut for the rest of my life XDDD;

Woo, sneaking on for internets! As long as you're alive, oh streaky one =3

[pax_athena]

*ggg* Insomnia is bad for you but good for us ;)

And you did it again, this time it's Starscream and Skyfire whom I absolutely can't get out of my head (and I read the story at work and could not concentrate on the stuff I had to do afterwards...).

Wheeljack is absolutely sweet :) And I'm so looking forward to more Elita&Optimus and 'Hide&Chromia. Chromia as a teacher - yeah, that totally works. And if her students knew what she is really like... Guess it's better than the fantasies of junior high students.
Any ideas already what Elita does for living?

Oh, and it was perfectly understandable who is speaking when, even with Firestar, Red Alert and Inferno - and three people speaking are hard to write. Absolutely great :)

[dytabytes]

Unfortunately true.

XDD Hey, if you have ideas, throw 'em at me. I'll pro'lly end up writing them eventually. God knows I've already done 5 bajillion of systemscrash's THAT BITCH. XDD

*cough*

But yeah XD. Elita's an environmentalist who does consulting for companies and also teaches at the local uni.

Oh I'm so glad it was clear =D!!

[systemscrash]

DON'T PRETEND LIKE YOU DIDN'T ENJOY IT.

>Bl

...unless you didn't.

IN WHICH CASE I'M SORRYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY. D8

[dytabytes]

*cries a little*

IS OKAY. AM GETTING USED TO THE CONSTANT BUGGERY. REALLY. D=

[cinderburster07]

TOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSST.

Have I told you how much you are my hero lately? No? YOU ARE MY HERO. Thar, I said it. :3

...I probably shouldn't comment on things after my Mongo-sized coffee cup of doom is emptied. Ah,well.

Anyway! This was awesome, as usual. XD I'm gonna go ahead and repeat everyone else: Wheeljack is cuteness cubed. Which is kind of frightening, when you think about it. Ironhide and Chromia are just made of WIN and awesome all over. <3

...and Starscream made me giggle. SO HARD. As did Firestar. Mwhahaha.

[dytabytes]

*giggles*

Thank you!

Every time I think of something cute, it goes on a list labelled "Things Wheeljack has/is/will do". The list is very long.

I am... highly motivated to do an IH/C fic now. We'll see where that takes me. =D

[oni_gil]

BWAAA. *dies* Apparently someone's idea of Valentine's Day is... *cough* more interesting than others'... *coughSkyfirecough* >3

And, er, if I had a boyfriend, I think I'd totally buy him roses too. XD

[dytabytes]

Heh. Indeed.

Also, yes, so would I. After all, who says that flowers are only for girls?