Comments | ds_flashfiction: TEAM ANGST: Day 14, "Dead on Arrival"

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TEAM ANGST: Day 14, "Dead on Arrival"

Nov 06, 2007 13:01

Title: Dead on Arrival
Author: secretlybronte
Team: Angst
Prompt: "She was the last one."
Pairing(s): F/K
Length: 31,000 words
Rating: NC-17
Warnings: graphic violence, non-graphic sexual violence involving an underage character, minor character death, very mild bondage
Author's Notes: This story had no hope of being everything I wanted it to be, but, in it, I ( Read more... )

team angst, ds match

Comments 27

brynnmck November 6 2007, 21:48:28 UTC

Awww! Man, what a great read. So well-plotted and paced, absolutely fantastic details, strong secondary characters, intense without being over-the-top, and I think my favorite thing about it was the strong undercurrent of humor running throughout, which balanced the more intense stuff just beautifully. And I love the idea of Ray teaching the cadets, and I adore beyond words Fraser assuming that Ray's a ghost, and having to be repeatedly convinced, and honestly, even after having finished the story, I'm still not sure that Fraser wasn't just fucking with him, in his own big-blue-eyed Mountie way. (Well, I mean. Obviously he was fucking with him. Just not necessarily like that. Hee.) Great idea, great execution, and man, if you wrote all this in a month, mystery author, my hat is off to you even more. :) Very nicely done!

grey853 November 6 2007, 23:48:52 UTC

This was a great story. I loved the parts with Ray and Fraser the most, of course. Poor Fraser, thinking Ray was a ghost even when he was really there. I really enjoyed that the most.

corbeaun November 7 2007, 00:36:29 UTC

I love how Ray knew he had to rescue those little girls, even though it would be blowing his cover - it didn't even occur to him he could do anything else. And the disbelief when he realized Anastazi was just going to let it go in order to catch "bigger" fish. So of course he goes off and does a little creative solving the problem of his own. *g* I also adore how Ray tried to tip off the border guard with the halibut - because obviously all Canadians would think like Fraser.

Those last few sections with Fraser and his absolute conviction that Ray was a ghost really made me anxious, because this story was designated as a tragedy (and isn't the definition of a tragedy, a sad ending?), and Fraser's insistence was really beginning to convince me that maybe he was onto something...

I'm relieved everything turned out happy for the characters involved. ^^

corbeaun November 7 2007, 01:17:57 UTC

Ooops, just realized it's Team ANGST, not team tragedy. Apparently, I've been reading this entire month with the wrong preconceptions. *hangs head*

bluebelle789 November 7 2007, 01:31:05 UTC

Wow, wow, WOW. That was completely and utterly fantastic. I thought the Kowalski-undercover parts were particularly gripping - and nasty. God how horrible for him being there alone, witnessing all that, having to be a part of it. *shudders* I was glad that after all that, the story took a little bit of a lighter turn with bits of humour thrown in. Especially when Ray finally finds Fraser, and Fraser thinks he's a ghost. Oh, that made me giggle!

So, yes. It is awesome times a millionty. Well done! :D

basking_lizard November 7 2007, 02:39:03 UTC

I had to go home when I was about 3/4 done and then when I got home I had to leave the house again, so there were about 5 hours where I didn't get to finish the story. I've just finished it and zomg what a fantastic read. I love that it was long and plotty, that it had undercover!Ray, that it had a real case in it, that it still had moments that were really funny.

(Also? Ray really does make an awesome teacher. :D 'HOW TO LIE' was terrific!)