Round 3, Challenge 9:The Screening
Grab a soda and some popcorn, movie fans … It’s time for the week nine screening!
Welcome all to the World Premiere of "Spontaneity has its time and place."
A couple of things to remember when deciding which drabbles to vote for (most and least favorite):
Guidelines:
As a voter, you have the option of leaving a brief statement about why you voted the way you did, for both most and least favorite. Your feedback will then be given to the drabble writer (if they want the feedback) ANONYMOUSLY.
Example: Most - #40: the ending was brilliant - OR - Least - #57: the ending fell flat
Please remember writers, that you may not vote for yourselves.
Here we go for week Nine!
Choose your favorite and least favorite drabbles. Favorites will receive +1 point per vote, and least favorites -1 point per vote.
Voting ends at 11:59pm, Friday, March 27th.
"Spontaneity has its time and place."
Scene (inspirational movie): The Sure Thing
Action (must include): Road trip setting; Knight Bus!
Theme (additional information): bickering/snark
1
Title: Not My Fault!
Author: hathorx
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: bad words
Word Count: 499
It all started when Hermione offered to take Malfoy to Harry’s birthday weekend in Dorset and curious to experience Muggle driving, he agreed.
That was before the engine gave a final cough and then stopped altogether.
“You’d better pull over, Granger,” Draco stated dryly. “I think the engine just died.”
Hermione barely glanced at him as she parked her old Muggle car on the side road. “Yes, I kind of figured that out for myself, Malfoy.”
“Not that I like to brag or anything, but I did tell you so,” he remarked loudly.
Hermione grit her teeth and hit the car wheel in frustration. “Damn it! I just don’t understand why it keeps dying on me.”
“Maybe 'cause you drive like a bloody maniac,” she heard the blond man say in undertones as he kicked open the passenger door.
“My driving is fine, thank you very much,” Hermione snapped after him. “It wasn’t my fault that damn tractor nearly ran into us earlier!”
“Whatever you say,” he answered snidely, leaning sideways against the car.
Hermione ignored his comment and retrieved her phone instead. “Crap, still no signal. What do we do now?”
“Pop the hood up, I’ll take a look at the engine,” Draco told her, moving to the front of the car.
Hermione eyed him suspiciously, but obliged.
“Well, colour me impressed,” she exclaimed, astonished to see him lift up the hood. “You’ve actually learnt something about cars.”
She stepped out again and stood beside him, watching as he glanced thoughtfully from one pipe to the next. Finally noticing his vague look, she took a deep, stabilising breath.
“You’ve got no idea what you’re doing, do you?” she asked.
“Nope, none,” he replied with a smirk. “Just seemed like the manly thing to do.”
“Damn it Malfoy,” Hermione finally exploded. “This is all your fault!”
“My fault?” he retorted, no longer amused. “Well, isn’t that rich? You’re the bloody driver!”
“Yes, but you were reading the map,” she hissed, throwing up her arms in exasperation. “If you had just followed my directions more closely, we wouldn’t be on this country road right now. I might not be the best driver, but you’re the most useless map-reader ever! I mean look where we are! We’re standing between two fields of cows!”
“Well why don’t you go join them?” Draco yelled in return. “I’m sure you’ll feel right at home!”
Hermione immediately fell silent, glaring at him angrily instead. If looks could kill, Draco Malfoy would be dead.
“That’s it, we’re taking the Knight Bus.”
Malfoy’s mouth sagged open in shock. “The Knight Bus?! Isn’t that for... commoners?”
Hermione shook her head in disbelief and stuck out her wand hand. “I can’t wait to see what you think of Ernie’s driving.”
“Well if it’s just as bad as yours...” However, he suddenly stood closely behind her, his voice lowering to a whisper. “Although I have to admit, Granger, the way you insulted that poor driver earlier; that was bloody sexy.”
2
Title: Stan Shunpike, Ladies Man
Author: luvscharlie
Rating: PG
Warnings: One very full of himself ladies man
Word Count: 493
These days it seemed like his "assignments" were more in the realm of 'let's see what it takes to drive Malfoy to commit murder.' The Ministry didn't allow former Death Eaters to go around with wand in hand. They were required to have "partners" and they had paired him with her.
They had spent two days chasing a marauding poltergeist who had an entire village terrified to come out-of-doors. The villagers all had to be Obliviated after watching the wee demon pull Draco up and down the street. Merlin, he hated this job.
"I'm not allowing you to side-along Apparate me," Draco shouted. "As tired as you are, we'll get splinched. We take the Knight Bus or we stay here."
Hermione made a noise in the back of her throat indicating she thought he was being ridiculous, then she reluctantly stuck out her wand. The Knight Bus came roaring into view moments later.
The door opened and Stan Shunpike stuck out his head. "I hope ye don't think you'll be riding on my bus," he said, crossing his arms. "Of course, I'd not be meaning you, little lady. You are always welcome. That one-he jabbed a finger at Draco-is not."
Hermione smiled. "Mr. Shunpike, I understand your reluctance considering what Mr. Malfoy's kind did to you during the war, but I would consider it a personal favour if you would allow him to ride your bus just this once." She fluttered her eyelashes at the homely little man and Draco had to bite his tongue not to laugh when Stan went red in the face.
"Well, madam, since you asked so nice and all," Stan said, straightening his robes, then turned to Draco. "One wrong move out of you, and don't think I won't toss your sorry arse off my bus."
Draco grunted his compliance and followed Hermione onboard. He had to admit she did have a way with people.
They both took a seat on a bench as the Knight Bus went roaring into motion. Draco chuckled as he saw Stan spray something into his mouth and attempt to smooth down his hair. He sidled over, wedging himself between them, and knocking Draco to the floor in the process.
Draco stood and brushed himself off, cracking his knuckles. Hermione caught his gaze and shook her head. He took a seat across from them and attempted to calm himself.
"You're a pretty lady, you are," Stan said, scooting closer.
Hermione attempted to move away, but Stan was stuck to her like glue. "Why don'cha give Ol' Stan a little smooch, darlin'?"
And that was it. Draco snapped. His fist slammed into Shunpike's nose, sending the man sprawling.
"What has gotten into you?" Hermione shouted, using her wand to heal the unconscious man's nose.
Draco wondered that himself.
Stan came round shortly. "Whoa, that was some kiss." He straightened up proudly, "When a girl's kissed by Stan Shunpike, she doesn't forget it!"
3
Title: 3 AM
Author: dazzled_x
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: cussing?
Word Count: 341
Draco Malfoy stared coldly at the newest occupant on the Knight Bus.
“Go away, Granger.”
“Trust me, Malfoy, I would if I could.”
“Do you enjoy speaking in dimwitted riddles?”
“I’m not a dimwit, you prat! I’m here to fetch you because your wife wouldn’t get off my property.”
“Thank you so much for caring about me, Granger. Your compassion is like warmth from the sun,” Draco Malfoy said sarcastically.
“You just told me to go away! And it is currently three in the blood morning - much too early to care.”
“Are you always this delightful?”
“You’re impossible.”
“No, that bird’s nest that you call hair is impossible.”
“I am convinced that Astoria is mental for wanting you to go home.”
“So give up.”
“I can’t! I promised.”
“It was just a matter of time for that to come out, wasn’t it?”
“What are you talking about?”
“Your holier-than-thou attitude - it was only a matter of time for it to surface in this conversation.”
“I hate you!” Hermione said disgustedly.
Draco chuckled. “I don’t give a damn.”
The brunette witch threw her hands up in frustration and yelled to the driver of the Knight Bus, “I’d like to get off on the next stop, please! You have a severe ferret infestation on this vehicle, also!”
“Real mature,” Draco sneered at Hermione.
Hermione glared in return.
They sat in a tense silence until the Bus pulled in front of Hermione’s flat in London.
Then, “I left because she accused me of being in love with you. I suppose I might have overreacted.”
Brown eyes curiously gazed upon grey ones.
“Are you?” It was hard not to miss the tremor in Hermione’s voice and hope in her question.
“I think I have been in love with you since the first time I saw you on this Bus, years ago,” he whispered.
“I think I have been in love with you for longer than that,” Hermione said.
Draco smiled. “I suppose I should get off on your stop, then.”
“I suppose so,” she agreed.
4
Title: Motion Sickness
Author: kalina_blue
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: Post-DH, EWE
Word Count: 498
"I hope you realise that if I die on this crazy bus, you'll never be able to find another wizard as charming, not to mention good in bed, as I am," Draco said, just as the Knight Bus swerved to the right, narrowly missing a set of townhouses.
"Draco, a flubberworm has more charm than you do," Hermione replied promptly.
Before Draco had the chance to protest against his girlfriend's rather unflattering assessment of his charisma, the bus made a particularly violent lurch forward, and Draco was knocked backwards onto the bed he was presently occupying.
"This is madness," he mumbled once he was able to sit up again. His skin had taken on a slightly green pallor.
"Are you alright?" Hermione asked, unsuccessfully trying to suppress a smile. She was clutching one of the bedposts so she wouldn't fall off the bed, but still looked decidedly more chipper than Draco.
His only answer was a mumbled string of curses, which Hermione wisely chose to overhear.
The Knight Bus suddenly jerked to a halt and a tiny witch in pink robes exited on shaky legs.
"Next stop, Malfoy Manor," Stan called from the front of the bus and they were off again.
"Thank Merlin," Draco exclaimed. "I can't believe Potter isn't connected to the Floo."
"He just wants his privacy," Hermione explained. "Besides, if you hadn't drunken so much Firewhiskey, we could have Apparated back."
"It's bad enough you objected me to an evening in the company of those imbeciles. Don't expect me to suffer through it sober," Draco replied, wiping sweat from his forehead.
"You're not going to throw up, are you?" Hermione asked apprehensively ignoring the jibe at her choice of friends.
Draco swallowed. "If I made it through the Weasel's nauseating account of how he proposed to that silly Lavender gal and not loose my dinner, I'm sure I can finish this ride without puking." He clutched the edge of the bed as the bus made a sharp turn to the left.
Another five minutes later, and Hermione and Draco stumbled out of the Knight Bus. While Hermione turned around to wish Stan a good night, Draco just stood there, gulping in the fresh air.
"Never again," he swore once the bus had vanished with a loud bang.
"Don't be such a baby," Hermione admonished. "It wasn't that bad."
"Sure," Draco agreed, his trademark smirk back in place now that the world around him had stopped spinning. "Let's see if you say the same tomorrow when we go for a fly on my new broomstick.
Hermione blanched. "Draco…"
"Not backing out, are you?" Draco drawled slowly. "After all it was you who said we should spend more time together and share each others' interests. Which is the sole reason why I let you drag me to that dinner at Potter's tonight."
"Right," Hermione intoned.
"Good, then tomorrow we'll fly." Draco said, seemingly oblivious to Hermione's stricken face. "Do you know what a Wronski Feint is?
5
Title: Clair de Lune
Author: bookishwench
Rating: PG
Warnings: very mild language
Word Count: 499
“I don’t believe you got us thrown off the Knight Bus,” Hermione grumbled as she and Draco walked down the road.
“You’d prefer listening to that barmy old hag singing the best of Stubby Bordman?” he asked.
“You were dreadfully rude to poor Mrs. Purkiss,” Hermione said, though honestly she had been nearly as annoying as Ron’s constant whinging about food during the horcrux hunt.
“I’m hungry,” Draco announced, the unfortunate coincidence nearly costing him Hermione’s fist in his eye.
“You should have thought of that before Stan Shunpike threw you off the bus,” Hermione said.
“That skinny runt? I could trounce him with my wand arm tied behind my back!” Draco yelled.
“The road grit on your backside says otherwise.”
“Studying my bum, Granger?” he asked, leering at her
She snorted and strode faster down the road.
“Why can’t we transport this thing by owl or broom?” Draco said, glaring at the box he carried.
“If you hadn’t fallen asleep at the meeting, you’d know it’s sensitive to altitude. If the owl or broom flew too high, it would level anything in a one mile radius,” she explained.
Draco looked at the package with a good deal more respect.
“What’s in here again?” he asked.
“Boomslang liver,” Hermione said slowly in the same tone as a playgroup teacher.
“And why are we delivering it from London to Liverpool?” Draco asked.
“It’s something the Unmentionables need, and it requires careful supervision. Not unlike you,” Hermione said.
The Knight Bus was two miles from their destination when Shunpike punted them, which had been Draco’s plan. For months he’d been trying to find a minute alone with Hermione to ask her to dinner. He was admiring her silhouette by moonlight from behind (and perhaps doing some bum studying of his own) when she toppled forward, landing flat on the ground.
“What happened?” he asked, crouching beside her.
“My high heel snapped, you nitwit!” she said. “Now help me up!”
“No,” he said flatly.
“No?” she said, staring up at him.
“Not unless you agree to go to dinner with me,” he said.
“Are you mad, Malfoy?” she said angrily. “We loathe each other!”
“No we don’t,” he said, sounding rather hurt.
“You aggravate me, I annoy you, and we generally fight like a pair of… well…”
“Randy alley cats?” he supplied helpfully.
“Yes! I mean no!” she said.
He offered her his hand.
“Fine,” she said, taking it. “One dinner, but not the Three Broomsticks. I don’t fancy watching you pant after Madam Rosmerta.”
“She’s nearly sixty, Hermione,” he said. “I think I can control myself.”
She gave him a look.
“Agreed,” Draco said reluctantly. “Now let’s deliver this thing before we wind up blowing a pit halfway to hell.”
“Yes, by all means, save the tour of Hades for our first date,” she said, and as she leaned on his arm to keep from limping with her broken shoe, Draco thought what a lovely night it was for a stroll.
6
Title: Running
Author: floorcoaster
Word Count: 497
Rating: PG
Warnings: None
Draco sat slouched on the Knight Bus, third floor, all the way in the back, his cloak pulled tightly around him. Beside him was a backpack that held everything he had-not much after being disowned by his family.
For two months he’d been on his own and had discovered that the best place to sleep was on the Knight Bus, provided you could sleep through the reckless, erratic driving.
When the Bus stopped, Draco silently pleaded with the new arrivals to avoid the top level, but after a few moments, he heard the sound of footsteps on the wooden staircase.
Annoyed, Draco watched, ready to chase away whoever it was. A frizzy brown mass appeared, followed by the spectacular body of Hermione Granger. She glanced around until her eyes rested on him.
“Malfoy?” she whispered.
Draco inwardly groaned and ignored her, pretending to be fast asleep. He could sense her staring at him for a few long moments before she came and sat on the sofa with him.
“Draco?”
“Bugger off,” he snapped, pulling his pack closer.
“I-I heard about what happened. I’m so sorry.”
The last thing he wanted was her pity, her kind words, her genuine heart. They were like salt in an open wound. “I said, bugger off.”
Not surprisingly, she didn’t.
“I’m glad to see you’re all right, at least.” She sighed. “I’ve been so worried, the way you disappeared.” Now her tone had a sharp edge to it. “You could have at least let me know you were all right, though I suppose it’s beyond you to really think about someone other than yourself.”
“This has nothing to do with you,” he sneered, finally looking her in the eye.
She shook her head. “That’s absurd! It has everything to do with me, you inconsiderate sod! Your parents disinherited you because of me!”
Draco scowled. He’d spent two months thinking about her, been terrified he’d thrown away the best thing in his life.
“You’re so stubborn,” she hissed. “Why didn’t you come to me? Did you regret what you said?”
“Never!” He rounded on her, anger bubbling hot. “How dare you ask that?”
“How dare you drop off the planet without a word?!” she countered, eyes fierce. “I was worried! I love you! I had every intention of marrying you, and this is how you treat me?”
The sweet memories of their last night together flooded his mind, sending pain shooting through his heart. “I have nothing to give you. Nothing. No future, no hope. I had to leave.”
“I’m sorry you feel that way.”
He shrugged. “You deserve better.”
Hermione put a hand on his arm. “I want you. I don’t care if you don’t have money or family. You don’t need them; you have me.”
“Are you absolutely certain?” he asked. “Can you forgive me for running?”
“Already done.” She was far too good for him.
He would spend the rest of his life trying to be worthy of her.
7
Title: Our History
Author: greenschist
Rating: G
Warnings: none
Word Count: 499
Parchment and quill ready, Hermione climbed into the Knight Bus and beamed at its purple-clad conductor.
"Good evening, Mr. Shunpike. We're back." She moved aside long enough to allow Draco to reach past and drop twenty-two Sickles into the box, thus-as Draco thought of it-paying for the privilege of harassing Stan Shunpike for a few hours.
"As I'm sure you remember, Mr. Malfoy and I are volunteering on behalf of the Batilda Bagshot Memorial Oral History Project, and we're here to give you the chance to tell the story of your wartime experiences in your own words." Hermione adopted her most encouraging tone, the one practiced to perfection on Harry and Ron. "I know you weren't in the mood to speak with us the last three times we were here, but I'm sure we'll have a nice talk tonight. What do you think?"
Shunpike glared, retreated up by the driver, barked, "No distractin' of the driver an' conductor!" and yanked shut the purple curtain he had put up after Draco and Hermione's first visit, blocking their view.
"Well, this promises to be another wasted evening." Draco commandeered the bed closest to the curtain and held on to the brass rail when the bus leaped forward. He caught Hermione as she fell toward the back of the bus and dropped her beside him on the bed. "You clearly terrify the man, Granger. Do all men hide when you start talking, or is it just your approach here?"
"My approach is fine, thank you. If Mr. Shunpike is terrified, it's because of the way the Ministry and Voldemort tormented him. You know, you've been remarkably unhelpful during these interviews, Malfoy. If you think it's easy forging a personal connection with Mr. Shunpike and persuading him to talk, let's see you try it."
"Fine." Draco straightened his spine and yelled, "Shunpike! As a former Death Eater, I order you to come out here and spill your guts!"
The bus swerved wildly, dumping one small bearded wizard out of his bed and rolling him under his neighbor.
"What is wrong with you?" Hermione leaped from the bed and stuck her head through the curtain. "Mr. Shunpike, I apologize. He didn't mean-"
"Back behin' the yellow line!" Shunpike shoved Hermione back far enough that she landed next to Draco again.
"Look," Draco pointed as he helped her sit up. A squiggly line had been painted on the floor behind the driver. "I guess he painted that after our last visit."
Hermione exhaled audibly. "Malfoy, we're here for one reason."
"Court-ordered community service?"
"No, a commitment to preserving our history!"
"Or perhaps the fact that I read the Op-Ed piece you wrote on volunteering and took the opportunity to spend time with you?"
The bus weaved around them, but Hermione ignored it. "Why would you do that?"
"Easy." Draco grabbed her quill as it rolled and gave it to her, letting his fingers brush hers, "I'm ready to move past our history."
8
Title: Obstacle Course.
Author: midnight_birth
Rating: PG
Warnings: None really.
Word Count: 499
“If those two crows don’t stop singing I’m going to Avada Kedavra them,” Draco growled.
“I happen to like show tunes.”
“Well, you also liked Arithmancy. You’re not exactly what I’d call a good judge of exciting things.”
If there was hell, this trip was probably the closest Hermione had ever come in her life to knowing what it was like. It was like an obstacle course. Pouring rain, misplaced baggage, horribly creepy Muggles and wizards alike, not to mention the indeed annoying elderly couple that insisted on singing Age of Aquarius loudly and repeatedly for the last three hours. (She didn’t like show tunes that much, for Merlin’s sake).
To top it off, she was traveling with Draco Malfoy, who was acting decidedly Malfoy. She knew, of course, that she wasn’t exactly being a lovely traveling companion herself presently, but nonetheless it was entirely his fault. His reckless, always whining, never satisfied, always teasing self was not built for these kinds of trips. She didn’t know what she was thinking when she agreed to this.
“Hot chocolate?” The conductor offered a steaming cup to Draco with a nervous smile, receiving a glare in return.
“None for me. Give it to the princess over there.” Draco gestured at Hermione. “I hear chocolate makes one less pissy.”
“That is it!” Hermione threw the book she was holding on the ground and the conductor scurried away hastily, knowing better than to stick around. “I’m pissy? It’s not like your incessant scorn about everything, not to mention your whining, has helped any!”
She glared at him as he stared back angrily. But looking into his face, she could see how tired he was. The anger seeped out of her as it was replaced by a rather strong sense of guilt. This whole thing was her idea.
“You’re hating this, aren’t you?” she asked.
“With every pore in my body.” He seemed to have conceded a truce. He didn’t sound angry.
She sighed and buried her face in her hands. It was only a couple of minutes before his arms came around her awkwardly.
“What is the matter with us?” she asked quietly, lifting up her face to look into his. “This wasn’t what I had in mind. Is this always going to be like this, fighting like cats and dogs?”
Draco frowned and took her hand. “It’s us,” he told her slowly. She’d asked this before. Every time she did, she could feel his heart skip a beat before he launched into a defence of “them”. “It will be like this some time. I doubt you and I can really be any other way with each other. But moments like these,” he nodded at their intertwined hands, “are worth it. I never said it was going to be easy.”
“You think?” She tried to smile. “It’s going to be better next time?”
A small smirk creased his lips and he rolled his eyes. “Yes. Decidedly. Mainly because we’re going to take brooms.”
ooo
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Welcome all to the World Premiere of "Spontaneity has its time and place."
A couple of things to remember when deciding which drabbles to vote for (most and least favorite):
Guidelines:
- Which drabble best incorporates the prompt?
- Is the drabble clever, different, fresh? Does it evoke an emotional response (good or bad)?
- Does the drabble contain grammar, canon or spelling errors?
- The movies merely serve as inspiration for the prompts. The requirements and theme are most important.
As a voter, you have the option of leaving a brief statement about why you voted the way you did, for both most and least favorite. Your feedback will then be given to the drabble writer (if they want the feedback) ANONYMOUSLY.
Example: Most - #40: the ending was brilliant - OR - Least - #57: the ending fell flat
Please remember writers, that you may not vote for yourselves.
Here we go for week Nine!
Choose your favorite and least favorite drabbles. Favorites will receive +1 point per vote, and least favorites -1 point per vote.
Voting ends at 11:59pm, Friday, March 27th.
"Spontaneity has its time and place."
Scene (inspirational movie): The Sure Thing
Action (must include): Road trip setting; Knight Bus!
Theme (additional information): bickering/snark
1
Title: Not My Fault!
Author: hathorx
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: bad words
Word Count: 499
It all started when Hermione offered to take Malfoy to Harry’s birthday weekend in Dorset and curious to experience Muggle driving, he agreed.
That was before the engine gave a final cough and then stopped altogether.
“You’d better pull over, Granger,” Draco stated dryly. “I think the engine just died.”
Hermione barely glanced at him as she parked her old Muggle car on the side road. “Yes, I kind of figured that out for myself, Malfoy.”
“Not that I like to brag or anything, but I did tell you so,” he remarked loudly.
Hermione grit her teeth and hit the car wheel in frustration. “Damn it! I just don’t understand why it keeps dying on me.”
“Maybe 'cause you drive like a bloody maniac,” she heard the blond man say in undertones as he kicked open the passenger door.
“My driving is fine, thank you very much,” Hermione snapped after him. “It wasn’t my fault that damn tractor nearly ran into us earlier!”
“Whatever you say,” he answered snidely, leaning sideways against the car.
Hermione ignored his comment and retrieved her phone instead. “Crap, still no signal. What do we do now?”
“Pop the hood up, I’ll take a look at the engine,” Draco told her, moving to the front of the car.
Hermione eyed him suspiciously, but obliged.
“Well, colour me impressed,” she exclaimed, astonished to see him lift up the hood. “You’ve actually learnt something about cars.”
She stepped out again and stood beside him, watching as he glanced thoughtfully from one pipe to the next. Finally noticing his vague look, she took a deep, stabilising breath.
“You’ve got no idea what you’re doing, do you?” she asked.
“Nope, none,” he replied with a smirk. “Just seemed like the manly thing to do.”
“Damn it Malfoy,” Hermione finally exploded. “This is all your fault!”
“My fault?” he retorted, no longer amused. “Well, isn’t that rich? You’re the bloody driver!”
“Yes, but you were reading the map,” she hissed, throwing up her arms in exasperation. “If you had just followed my directions more closely, we wouldn’t be on this country road right now. I might not be the best driver, but you’re the most useless map-reader ever! I mean look where we are! We’re standing between two fields of cows!”
“Well why don’t you go join them?” Draco yelled in return. “I’m sure you’ll feel right at home!”
Hermione immediately fell silent, glaring at him angrily instead. If looks could kill, Draco Malfoy would be dead.
“That’s it, we’re taking the Knight Bus.”
Malfoy’s mouth sagged open in shock. “The Knight Bus?! Isn’t that for... commoners?”
Hermione shook her head in disbelief and stuck out her wand hand. “I can’t wait to see what you think of Ernie’s driving.”
“Well if it’s just as bad as yours...” However, he suddenly stood closely behind her, his voice lowering to a whisper. “Although I have to admit, Granger, the way you insulted that poor driver earlier; that was bloody sexy.”
2
Title: Stan Shunpike, Ladies Man
Author: luvscharlie
Rating: PG
Warnings: One very full of himself ladies man
Word Count: 493
These days it seemed like his "assignments" were more in the realm of 'let's see what it takes to drive Malfoy to commit murder.' The Ministry didn't allow former Death Eaters to go around with wand in hand. They were required to have "partners" and they had paired him with her.
They had spent two days chasing a marauding poltergeist who had an entire village terrified to come out-of-doors. The villagers all had to be Obliviated after watching the wee demon pull Draco up and down the street. Merlin, he hated this job.
"I'm not allowing you to side-along Apparate me," Draco shouted. "As tired as you are, we'll get splinched. We take the Knight Bus or we stay here."
Hermione made a noise in the back of her throat indicating she thought he was being ridiculous, then she reluctantly stuck out her wand. The Knight Bus came roaring into view moments later.
The door opened and Stan Shunpike stuck out his head. "I hope ye don't think you'll be riding on my bus," he said, crossing his arms. "Of course, I'd not be meaning you, little lady. You are always welcome. That one-he jabbed a finger at Draco-is not."
Hermione smiled. "Mr. Shunpike, I understand your reluctance considering what Mr. Malfoy's kind did to you during the war, but I would consider it a personal favour if you would allow him to ride your bus just this once." She fluttered her eyelashes at the homely little man and Draco had to bite his tongue not to laugh when Stan went red in the face.
"Well, madam, since you asked so nice and all," Stan said, straightening his robes, then turned to Draco. "One wrong move out of you, and don't think I won't toss your sorry arse off my bus."
Draco grunted his compliance and followed Hermione onboard. He had to admit she did have a way with people.
They both took a seat on a bench as the Knight Bus went roaring into motion. Draco chuckled as he saw Stan spray something into his mouth and attempt to smooth down his hair. He sidled over, wedging himself between them, and knocking Draco to the floor in the process.
Draco stood and brushed himself off, cracking his knuckles. Hermione caught his gaze and shook her head. He took a seat across from them and attempted to calm himself.
"You're a pretty lady, you are," Stan said, scooting closer.
Hermione attempted to move away, but Stan was stuck to her like glue. "Why don'cha give Ol' Stan a little smooch, darlin'?"
And that was it. Draco snapped. His fist slammed into Shunpike's nose, sending the man sprawling.
"What has gotten into you?" Hermione shouted, using her wand to heal the unconscious man's nose.
Draco wondered that himself.
Stan came round shortly. "Whoa, that was some kiss." He straightened up proudly, "When a girl's kissed by Stan Shunpike, she doesn't forget it!"
3
Title: 3 AM
Author: dazzled_x
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: cussing?
Word Count: 341
Draco Malfoy stared coldly at the newest occupant on the Knight Bus.
“Go away, Granger.”
“Trust me, Malfoy, I would if I could.”
“Do you enjoy speaking in dimwitted riddles?”
“I’m not a dimwit, you prat! I’m here to fetch you because your wife wouldn’t get off my property.”
“Thank you so much for caring about me, Granger. Your compassion is like warmth from the sun,” Draco Malfoy said sarcastically.
“You just told me to go away! And it is currently three in the blood morning - much too early to care.”
“Are you always this delightful?”
“You’re impossible.”
“No, that bird’s nest that you call hair is impossible.”
“I am convinced that Astoria is mental for wanting you to go home.”
“So give up.”
“I can’t! I promised.”
“It was just a matter of time for that to come out, wasn’t it?”
“What are you talking about?”
“Your holier-than-thou attitude - it was only a matter of time for it to surface in this conversation.”
“I hate you!” Hermione said disgustedly.
Draco chuckled. “I don’t give a damn.”
The brunette witch threw her hands up in frustration and yelled to the driver of the Knight Bus, “I’d like to get off on the next stop, please! You have a severe ferret infestation on this vehicle, also!”
“Real mature,” Draco sneered at Hermione.
Hermione glared in return.
They sat in a tense silence until the Bus pulled in front of Hermione’s flat in London.
Then, “I left because she accused me of being in love with you. I suppose I might have overreacted.”
Brown eyes curiously gazed upon grey ones.
“Are you?” It was hard not to miss the tremor in Hermione’s voice and hope in her question.
“I think I have been in love with you since the first time I saw you on this Bus, years ago,” he whispered.
“I think I have been in love with you for longer than that,” Hermione said.
Draco smiled. “I suppose I should get off on your stop, then.”
“I suppose so,” she agreed.
4
Title: Motion Sickness
Author: kalina_blue
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: Post-DH, EWE
Word Count: 498
"I hope you realise that if I die on this crazy bus, you'll never be able to find another wizard as charming, not to mention good in bed, as I am," Draco said, just as the Knight Bus swerved to the right, narrowly missing a set of townhouses.
"Draco, a flubberworm has more charm than you do," Hermione replied promptly.
Before Draco had the chance to protest against his girlfriend's rather unflattering assessment of his charisma, the bus made a particularly violent lurch forward, and Draco was knocked backwards onto the bed he was presently occupying.
"This is madness," he mumbled once he was able to sit up again. His skin had taken on a slightly green pallor.
"Are you alright?" Hermione asked, unsuccessfully trying to suppress a smile. She was clutching one of the bedposts so she wouldn't fall off the bed, but still looked decidedly more chipper than Draco.
His only answer was a mumbled string of curses, which Hermione wisely chose to overhear.
The Knight Bus suddenly jerked to a halt and a tiny witch in pink robes exited on shaky legs.
"Next stop, Malfoy Manor," Stan called from the front of the bus and they were off again.
"Thank Merlin," Draco exclaimed. "I can't believe Potter isn't connected to the Floo."
"He just wants his privacy," Hermione explained. "Besides, if you hadn't drunken so much Firewhiskey, we could have Apparated back."
"It's bad enough you objected me to an evening in the company of those imbeciles. Don't expect me to suffer through it sober," Draco replied, wiping sweat from his forehead.
"You're not going to throw up, are you?" Hermione asked apprehensively ignoring the jibe at her choice of friends.
Draco swallowed. "If I made it through the Weasel's nauseating account of how he proposed to that silly Lavender gal and not loose my dinner, I'm sure I can finish this ride without puking." He clutched the edge of the bed as the bus made a sharp turn to the left.
Another five minutes later, and Hermione and Draco stumbled out of the Knight Bus. While Hermione turned around to wish Stan a good night, Draco just stood there, gulping in the fresh air.
"Never again," he swore once the bus had vanished with a loud bang.
"Don't be such a baby," Hermione admonished. "It wasn't that bad."
"Sure," Draco agreed, his trademark smirk back in place now that the world around him had stopped spinning. "Let's see if you say the same tomorrow when we go for a fly on my new broomstick.
Hermione blanched. "Draco…"
"Not backing out, are you?" Draco drawled slowly. "After all it was you who said we should spend more time together and share each others' interests. Which is the sole reason why I let you drag me to that dinner at Potter's tonight."
"Right," Hermione intoned.
"Good, then tomorrow we'll fly." Draco said, seemingly oblivious to Hermione's stricken face. "Do you know what a Wronski Feint is?
5
Title: Clair de Lune
Author: bookishwench
Rating: PG
Warnings: very mild language
Word Count: 499
“I don’t believe you got us thrown off the Knight Bus,” Hermione grumbled as she and Draco walked down the road.
“You’d prefer listening to that barmy old hag singing the best of Stubby Bordman?” he asked.
“You were dreadfully rude to poor Mrs. Purkiss,” Hermione said, though honestly she had been nearly as annoying as Ron’s constant whinging about food during the horcrux hunt.
“I’m hungry,” Draco announced, the unfortunate coincidence nearly costing him Hermione’s fist in his eye.
“You should have thought of that before Stan Shunpike threw you off the bus,” Hermione said.
“That skinny runt? I could trounce him with my wand arm tied behind my back!” Draco yelled.
“The road grit on your backside says otherwise.”
“Studying my bum, Granger?” he asked, leering at her
She snorted and strode faster down the road.
“Why can’t we transport this thing by owl or broom?” Draco said, glaring at the box he carried.
“If you hadn’t fallen asleep at the meeting, you’d know it’s sensitive to altitude. If the owl or broom flew too high, it would level anything in a one mile radius,” she explained.
Draco looked at the package with a good deal more respect.
“What’s in here again?” he asked.
“Boomslang liver,” Hermione said slowly in the same tone as a playgroup teacher.
“And why are we delivering it from London to Liverpool?” Draco asked.
“It’s something the Unmentionables need, and it requires careful supervision. Not unlike you,” Hermione said.
The Knight Bus was two miles from their destination when Shunpike punted them, which had been Draco’s plan. For months he’d been trying to find a minute alone with Hermione to ask her to dinner. He was admiring her silhouette by moonlight from behind (and perhaps doing some bum studying of his own) when she toppled forward, landing flat on the ground.
“What happened?” he asked, crouching beside her.
“My high heel snapped, you nitwit!” she said. “Now help me up!”
“No,” he said flatly.
“No?” she said, staring up at him.
“Not unless you agree to go to dinner with me,” he said.
“Are you mad, Malfoy?” she said angrily. “We loathe each other!”
“No we don’t,” he said, sounding rather hurt.
“You aggravate me, I annoy you, and we generally fight like a pair of… well…”
“Randy alley cats?” he supplied helpfully.
“Yes! I mean no!” she said.
He offered her his hand.
“Fine,” she said, taking it. “One dinner, but not the Three Broomsticks. I don’t fancy watching you pant after Madam Rosmerta.”
“She’s nearly sixty, Hermione,” he said. “I think I can control myself.”
She gave him a look.
“Agreed,” Draco said reluctantly. “Now let’s deliver this thing before we wind up blowing a pit halfway to hell.”
“Yes, by all means, save the tour of Hades for our first date,” she said, and as she leaned on his arm to keep from limping with her broken shoe, Draco thought what a lovely night it was for a stroll.
6
Title: Running
Author: floorcoaster
Word Count: 497
Rating: PG
Warnings: None
Draco sat slouched on the Knight Bus, third floor, all the way in the back, his cloak pulled tightly around him. Beside him was a backpack that held everything he had-not much after being disowned by his family.
For two months he’d been on his own and had discovered that the best place to sleep was on the Knight Bus, provided you could sleep through the reckless, erratic driving.
When the Bus stopped, Draco silently pleaded with the new arrivals to avoid the top level, but after a few moments, he heard the sound of footsteps on the wooden staircase.
Annoyed, Draco watched, ready to chase away whoever it was. A frizzy brown mass appeared, followed by the spectacular body of Hermione Granger. She glanced around until her eyes rested on him.
“Malfoy?” she whispered.
Draco inwardly groaned and ignored her, pretending to be fast asleep. He could sense her staring at him for a few long moments before she came and sat on the sofa with him.
“Draco?”
“Bugger off,” he snapped, pulling his pack closer.
“I-I heard about what happened. I’m so sorry.”
The last thing he wanted was her pity, her kind words, her genuine heart. They were like salt in an open wound. “I said, bugger off.”
Not surprisingly, she didn’t.
“I’m glad to see you’re all right, at least.” She sighed. “I’ve been so worried, the way you disappeared.” Now her tone had a sharp edge to it. “You could have at least let me know you were all right, though I suppose it’s beyond you to really think about someone other than yourself.”
“This has nothing to do with you,” he sneered, finally looking her in the eye.
She shook her head. “That’s absurd! It has everything to do with me, you inconsiderate sod! Your parents disinherited you because of me!”
Draco scowled. He’d spent two months thinking about her, been terrified he’d thrown away the best thing in his life.
“You’re so stubborn,” she hissed. “Why didn’t you come to me? Did you regret what you said?”
“Never!” He rounded on her, anger bubbling hot. “How dare you ask that?”
“How dare you drop off the planet without a word?!” she countered, eyes fierce. “I was worried! I love you! I had every intention of marrying you, and this is how you treat me?”
The sweet memories of their last night together flooded his mind, sending pain shooting through his heart. “I have nothing to give you. Nothing. No future, no hope. I had to leave.”
“I’m sorry you feel that way.”
He shrugged. “You deserve better.”
Hermione put a hand on his arm. “I want you. I don’t care if you don’t have money or family. You don’t need them; you have me.”
“Are you absolutely certain?” he asked. “Can you forgive me for running?”
“Already done.” She was far too good for him.
He would spend the rest of his life trying to be worthy of her.
7
Title: Our History
Author: greenschist
Rating: G
Warnings: none
Word Count: 499
Parchment and quill ready, Hermione climbed into the Knight Bus and beamed at its purple-clad conductor.
"Good evening, Mr. Shunpike. We're back." She moved aside long enough to allow Draco to reach past and drop twenty-two Sickles into the box, thus-as Draco thought of it-paying for the privilege of harassing Stan Shunpike for a few hours.
"As I'm sure you remember, Mr. Malfoy and I are volunteering on behalf of the Batilda Bagshot Memorial Oral History Project, and we're here to give you the chance to tell the story of your wartime experiences in your own words." Hermione adopted her most encouraging tone, the one practiced to perfection on Harry and Ron. "I know you weren't in the mood to speak with us the last three times we were here, but I'm sure we'll have a nice talk tonight. What do you think?"
Shunpike glared, retreated up by the driver, barked, "No distractin' of the driver an' conductor!" and yanked shut the purple curtain he had put up after Draco and Hermione's first visit, blocking their view.
"Well, this promises to be another wasted evening." Draco commandeered the bed closest to the curtain and held on to the brass rail when the bus leaped forward. He caught Hermione as she fell toward the back of the bus and dropped her beside him on the bed. "You clearly terrify the man, Granger. Do all men hide when you start talking, or is it just your approach here?"
"My approach is fine, thank you. If Mr. Shunpike is terrified, it's because of the way the Ministry and Voldemort tormented him. You know, you've been remarkably unhelpful during these interviews, Malfoy. If you think it's easy forging a personal connection with Mr. Shunpike and persuading him to talk, let's see you try it."
"Fine." Draco straightened his spine and yelled, "Shunpike! As a former Death Eater, I order you to come out here and spill your guts!"
The bus swerved wildly, dumping one small bearded wizard out of his bed and rolling him under his neighbor.
"What is wrong with you?" Hermione leaped from the bed and stuck her head through the curtain. "Mr. Shunpike, I apologize. He didn't mean-"
"Back behin' the yellow line!" Shunpike shoved Hermione back far enough that she landed next to Draco again.
"Look," Draco pointed as he helped her sit up. A squiggly line had been painted on the floor behind the driver. "I guess he painted that after our last visit."
Hermione exhaled audibly. "Malfoy, we're here for one reason."
"Court-ordered community service?"
"No, a commitment to preserving our history!"
"Or perhaps the fact that I read the Op-Ed piece you wrote on volunteering and took the opportunity to spend time with you?"
The bus weaved around them, but Hermione ignored it. "Why would you do that?"
"Easy." Draco grabbed her quill as it rolled and gave it to her, letting his fingers brush hers, "I'm ready to move past our history."
8
Title: Obstacle Course.
Author: midnight_birth
Rating: PG
Warnings: None really.
Word Count: 499
“If those two crows don’t stop singing I’m going to Avada Kedavra them,” Draco growled.
“I happen to like show tunes.”
“Well, you also liked Arithmancy. You’re not exactly what I’d call a good judge of exciting things.”
If there was hell, this trip was probably the closest Hermione had ever come in her life to knowing what it was like. It was like an obstacle course. Pouring rain, misplaced baggage, horribly creepy Muggles and wizards alike, not to mention the indeed annoying elderly couple that insisted on singing Age of Aquarius loudly and repeatedly for the last three hours. (She didn’t like show tunes that much, for Merlin’s sake).
To top it off, she was traveling with Draco Malfoy, who was acting decidedly Malfoy. She knew, of course, that she wasn’t exactly being a lovely traveling companion herself presently, but nonetheless it was entirely his fault. His reckless, always whining, never satisfied, always teasing self was not built for these kinds of trips. She didn’t know what she was thinking when she agreed to this.
“Hot chocolate?” The conductor offered a steaming cup to Draco with a nervous smile, receiving a glare in return.
“None for me. Give it to the princess over there.” Draco gestured at Hermione. “I hear chocolate makes one less pissy.”
“That is it!” Hermione threw the book she was holding on the ground and the conductor scurried away hastily, knowing better than to stick around. “I’m pissy? It’s not like your incessant scorn about everything, not to mention your whining, has helped any!”
She glared at him as he stared back angrily. But looking into his face, she could see how tired he was. The anger seeped out of her as it was replaced by a rather strong sense of guilt. This whole thing was her idea.
“You’re hating this, aren’t you?” she asked.
“With every pore in my body.” He seemed to have conceded a truce. He didn’t sound angry.
She sighed and buried her face in her hands. It was only a couple of minutes before his arms came around her awkwardly.
“What is the matter with us?” she asked quietly, lifting up her face to look into his. “This wasn’t what I had in mind. Is this always going to be like this, fighting like cats and dogs?”
Draco frowned and took her hand. “It’s us,” he told her slowly. She’d asked this before. Every time she did, she could feel his heart skip a beat before he launched into a defence of “them”. “It will be like this some time. I doubt you and I can really be any other way with each other. But moments like these,” he nodded at their intertwined hands, “are worth it. I never said it was going to be easy.”
“You think?” She tried to smile. “It’s going to be better next time?”
A small smirk creased his lips and he rolled his eyes. “Yes. Decidedly. Mainly because we’re going to take brooms.”
ooo
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