FIC: Potter’s Parselprostate (and the Chamber of Secrets) (NC-17)

[dracotops_mods]

Happy Birthday, winnett!

Title: Potter’s Parselprostate (and the Chamber of Secrets)
Author: dicta_contrion
Prompt: # 29
Summary: Hogwarts’ future depends on Malfoy’s texts. Too bad the key is up Potter’s arse.
Rating: NC-17
Warning(s): (highlight for details): *mild dubcon - Harry is pressured to have sex to help Hogwarts/Hermione.*
Word Count: 17,437
Author's Notes:

Comments

[zeitgeistic]

YESSS. I am so here for this! Cannot wait to read. Thank you for picking my prompt! Absolutely nothing wrong with 17k of parselsmut.

Oh my god, the title. I am already cackling and I know this is going to be amazing.

Oh my god, the summary. I am AT WORK. Author, what are you trying to do? I am DYING.

[zeitgeistic]

Oh my god. Author. This was amazing. I am astounded that you took this alleged "prompt", which was really only a badly disguised attempt to get parselsmut and bossy-bottom!Harry in the same story, and somehow made it into this amazing, hilarious, adorable, SEXY fic. Brava! There is so much I loved about it. I would quote all of the lines I like, but you wrote the story so you know what it looks like. Instead I'll just quote 5 or so. We'll see how it goes:

Harry shook his head miserably. “There isn’t. I can’t, you know….”
“Reach?”
“Focus,” he hissed. “Magic takes focus.”

*cackles* Harry was so indignant, and Hermione trying to ~get it~ and remain ~academic~ was so perfect.

“Or you could just have me fuck you.”
Two heads snapped towards Malfoy.
“Please. You must realise I’m not actually a first year Hufflepuff, and your quasi-euphemisms are hardly sophisticated. Potter here needs it up the arse to translate, fine.”

Hahaha. I adore that they thought they were being subtle and the whole time, Draco knew what was going on.

“I’m going

[dicta_contrion]

I can’t even tell you how much flail this comment induced! There was grinning and happy dancing and all-around glee.

This prompt was so much fun to write, start to finish. It was the perfect amount of structure and room to run free and I had an absolute blast with all the things you mentioned. Snape was very opinionated about everything, Draco was pleased with himself for seeing through the Gryffindors (in addition to being unimpressed with their euphemisms), Narcissa is secretly on top of everything, and all of the details were absolutely delightful to come up with. And how often does anyone actually get to tell a penis/snake joke? Let the snarky comments run wild? Not frequently enough, and this fic was the perfect excuse to play in those fields.

Thank you for the fantastic prompt and the amazing comment. I’m so thrilled that you were pleased!!

[zeitgeistic]

I laughed again reading the quotes from my original comment. *glomps*

[digthewriter]

HA.

This was super hot, and I laughed so much while reading it.

Loved the dirty talk and everything! What a great way to start the fest! <3

[dicta_contrion]

Thank you!! It was a delight to write and I'm so glad you laughed. ♥

[raitala]

[dicta_contrion]

Thank you!! I adored writing awkward Harry, ditto their reluctant interest. This was tremendous fun to write and I’m so glad it was fun to read as well!

[thrilladdict]

That was hilarious. And quite hot. Oh my!

[dicta_contrion]

Thank you!! That was exactly the goal :)

[kurosaki_ami]

OMFG this was absolutely HOT! And hilarious, an even cute, if I squint a little. I loved it! I think it's a wonderful way to start the fest! :) Thank you for such a nice story, Mistery Author!

[dicta_contrion]

Thank you so much for your lovely comment! So glad you liked it!