I think that your approach is best--especially considering the year I'm coming up on. Will you be Yoda to my Luke Skywalker and explain to me how it is done? ;)
The key is to care, but not in an attached sort of way. I really do adore all the guys I see when I travel, but the distance keeps me from being able to get REALLY attached. I do sometimes cry when I leave them, but it all sorts itself out. I keep in touch with them mostly too.
And you can't get sucked in with guys who are all about one night stands. I like mine to be a long series of cuddly one night after another stands. I don't think I've ever had an honest to god one night stand tho.
Wow. I saw a big post and thought it was going to be this long, introspective depressed thing about what went wrong and what-not. You are truly more amazing than you know for dealing with a break-up in this way! To actually recognize the freedom that you have and not feel chained to emotions that you used to feel... It's fabulous! I guess that post about "growing up" was true - you have wisdom I don't think I ever learned.
Anyway, I know it is a rocky time and it will be difficult to move on despite knowing that it's probably good for you. But I just wanted to drop you a little line of encouragement and say: you are dealing with this so well! There is no doubt in my mind that you will make it through to the other side, and quickly.
*shrugs* I know what went wrong and it can't be fixed right now, so I've pretty much resigned myself to not thinking about that part of it.
And, well... I'm still chained to some of those emotions. I'm just trying to concentrate on all the good parts about this, instead. It's funny, I went back to that "growing up" post and saw that line about giving up destructive friendships as soon as they're presented to me and I realized that's exactly what I did last week. I recognized what was about to turn into something really unhealthy for me and I stopped it before I could start.
I miss him. I miss him like nothing else--he was my best friend and my lover and my favorite person and he disappointed me utterly and that HURTS. But I'm proud of myself--I did the right thing. I can't even BELIEVE I had the strength to do it, but I did.
Also, it helps that my optimism is indestructible.
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I took year off from seriously dating anyone, and it's been GREAT. It changes everything about approaching life, in the best way.
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(that sounds so dirty for some reason)
The key is to care, but not in an attached sort of way. I really do adore all the guys I see when I travel, but the distance keeps me from being able to get REALLY attached. I do sometimes cry when I leave them, but it all sorts itself out. I keep in touch with them mostly too.
And you can't get sucked in with guys who are all about one night stands. I like mine to be a long series of cuddly one night after another stands. I don't think I've ever had an honest to god one night stand tho.
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Anyway, I know it is a rocky time and it will be difficult to move on despite knowing that it's probably good for you. But I just wanted to drop you a little line of encouragement and say: you are dealing with this so well! There is no doubt in my mind that you will make it through to the other side, and quickly.
Love ya!
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And, well... I'm still chained to some of those emotions. I'm just trying to concentrate on all the good parts about this, instead. It's funny, I went back to that "growing up" post and saw that line about giving up destructive friendships as soon as they're presented to me and I realized that's exactly what I did last week. I recognized what was about to turn into something really unhealthy for me and I stopped it before I could start.
I miss him. I miss him like nothing else--he was my best friend and my lover and my favorite person and he disappointed me utterly and that HURTS. But I'm proud of myself--I did the right thing. I can't even BELIEVE I had the strength to do it, but I did.
Also, it helps that my optimism is indestructible.
Love you, too! Hope you're doing well! *godivas*
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