Comments | docbrite: And Then

docbrite

And Then

Oct 17, 2011 12:39

And then there are those times when you're attacked by body dysphoria so severe you want to peel your skin off, and it lasts two days and counting, and you feel like you're not making any progress, you're just fooling yourself, and everyone in the world helpfully reinforces that by mis-pronouning you, and you're becoming way too dependent on your ( Read more... )

liquor, transgender, aargh, ftm, health

Comments 19

arielstarshadow October 17 2011, 21:48:38 UTC

In all of the recent photos you've shared, you absolutely look like a dude to me! It's so awesome to see.

creatore_magico October 18 2011, 08:18:41 UTC

Hang in there Doc. Remember you're not alone. I saw this piece of art and it bought up so many emotions, I hope it gives you something too, even if it is just the understanding that we stand alone and together too.

pansycore October 18 2011, 12:43:10 UTC

i know how horrible it feels but it'll pass at least to the extent that it's not so dominant in your mind and body, you just gotta wait it out and you'll get a break soon. are there any local trans groups you could go to, if you think you'd be interested in that? that might help. at least hanging out with my friends who are also trans* helps me feel better a lot of the time. also, distractions can help, anything to put your mind away from yourself a little.
take care

tamago23 October 18 2011, 21:22:37 UTC

You're not fooling yourself and you're not fooling us, because "fooling" would require a deception. There's nothing deceptive here. You're a man, full stop. Your body may not match that yet, but you're in the process of doing what you can to fix that. You are on the path of living your life with honesty to yourself and others, living as what you are: a man. If others can't (or refuse to) acknowledge or realize that, that's *their* failing, not yours ( ... )

cassandraterra October 19 2011, 00:10:29 UTC

It's times like this that I am glad my cat's don't give an ever loving fuck what my gender is. And dammit, their cuddles help.

I hear ya. I am constantly being betrayed by my body. I tell it NO! I AM MAN! It goes, NO, still a girl...have your period for like two weeks and counting...hahah! What meds?!

Me: RAAAAAGE!!!!!

And please eat. I've taken alcohol on an empty stomach and I dry heaved for hours. Maybe a grilled cheese sandwich? Something simple? Milk?