Title: Motions of the Infinite
Author:
digthewriter | Recipient:
maraudersaffairPairing: Neville/Charlie
Request/Prompt Used: Neville/Charlie + Secret Relationship. - For the
rarepair_shorts SUMMER WISHLIST 2019 event.
Rating: PG-13
Word Count/Art Medium: 1575
Summary: Neville hung his head low and he didn't turn around to face Charlie for what Charlie thought was forever. It wasn't supposed to be like this. It wasn't supposed to be this complicated.
Notes: Unbetaed. Thank you
maraudersaffair for allowing me a chance to write my favourite pairing! Also written for
enchanted_jae JMDC June Challenge: watch the sun set/enjoy the sunset
Charlie wasn't one to push anyone for more than they could give. Especially Neville. Their situation for lack of a better word had started as something temporary and for the longest time, Charlie had thought it was going to fizzle out.
Except, it hadn't.
It'd been almost three years now. Finding reasons to see each other, spending the night in the other's flat, and sometimes even making breakfast for each other.
He knew how sensitive Neville was about having a relationship. He'd never wanted one again.
Charlie had been in the audience when everyone was waiting for a wedding to start and it never had. Neville never emerged from his dressing rooms and the other groom had never even showed up. Neville had been left at the altar, and he'd been utterly crushed.
With Ginny, Ron, Harry and Charlie's help, they'd managed to send everyone home without much fuss. Sebastian, the fucking coward, never showed his face.
Weeks after, Charlie had run into Neville at a market in Romania. Though Neville was being cordial, Charlie could tell he was extremely uncomfortable at seeing someone who had been there.
"Let me buy you a drink," Charlie had said.
One thing led to another and now, three years later, they'd continued their arrangement without a setback.
Except, Charlie wanted more.
*
Sebastian had been all wrong for Neville. They barely spoke about it - but Charlie knew Neville was only settling for him. It hadn't been his idea to get married but it'd been his embarrassment to bear.
"You're thinking awfully hard," Neville said, rolling over to pull Charlie close to him and placing his head on Charlie's chest. "Dragons keeping you up at night again?"
"No…" Charlie said, humming. He loved the warmth spreading through him whenever Neville was close. He loved feeling Neville's smile against his skin even if he couldn't see Nev's face. "Well, yes. But not tonight."
"What's keeping you up tonight?" Neville chuckled and Charlie's entire body vibrated. "Wanna talk about it?"
"I thought we didn't talk," Charlie said absentmindedly. He wasn't thinking as he'd blurted it out and he felt Neville's body stiffen. "Shit."
"I'll go," Neville said as he started to pull away. "I always overstay my welcome."
"No." Charlie pulled on Neville's elbow and made sure Neville didn't leave his bed. "I don't want you to leave. And you neveroverstay-I want you here. More. That's what this is about."
Neville hung his head low and he didn't turn around to face Charlie for what Charlie thought was forever. It wasn't supposed to be like this. It wasn't supposed to be this complicated. But that's what he loved about them. He loved how much he felt for Neville and how it scared the shit out of him. Still, he didn't want to back away from that. Neville was also another scared, beautiful, magical creature Charlie wanted to be around. To make his.
With some hesitation, Charlie let go of his hold on Neville's arm and sat up in bed. "Will you look at me?" he asked softly.
Neville finally turned around. He sat cross legged and his gaze took another million seconds to meet Charlie's. "I hadn't meant for this."
Charlie snorted. "For what? To make me fall for you?" Might as well say it. Might as well lay it all out. It was now or never.
The confused look in Neville's eyes spoke volumes. There was a hint of fear there but Charlie was confident it wasn't fear because Charlie fancied him more than he was supposed to. It was because maybe, just maybe, Neville felt the same way.
"I don't know how it happened," Neville said, looking away from Charlie again. Why did they always have these deep, thoughtful conversations in the middle of the night - hours before they're supposed to be at work?
"I never wanted to get married, you know," he added and Charlie stayed quiet. He did know. Neville had told him in the beginning when they were drunk at a pub. "And after…and his letter…"
"What letter?"
"He wrote to me a few months later. I think it was supposed to be the anniversary of our first date. He wanted to meet and talk and I don't know…try again."
"I didn't kn-" Charlie stopped himself. They weren't a thing; it wasn't his place. "Did you tell anyone?"
Neville shrugged. "He wrote to me again, maybe a few times, every few months. I started burning without reading them. I knew I should have replied and a few months ago, I finally did."
Charlie's eyes widened. He had noticed a shift in Neville's behaviour around… "When Ginny got married?" He hadn't been able to figure out what it was that was different because if anything, he'd thought Neville was less distant since then.
Neville nodded. "I finally answered him."
"What did you say?" Charlie's heart was beating so fast. How could he have been so stupid? They'd talked about this in the past-this wasn't anything. But, he didn't know Neville was going to go back to that arsehole either. "Or maybe you shouldn't tell me."
"I told him the truth. I said I didn't read his letters. I'd burned them all and he needed to stop writing to me. If he didn't, then I was going to place a jinx on his owl."
A surprised laughter escaped Charlie; not only at Neville's answer to Sebastian but also at the thought of Neville ever hurting a creature. He was the kindest soul in the world. Without even thinking about it, Charlie pulled Neville close to him. Neville willingly came. He straddled Charlie's lap and buried his face in Charlie's neck.
"I love it when we're like this…" Charlie whispered into Neville's hair. He was glad it was still dark enough in his bedroom so they didn't have to look at each other. It was better this way. It was better for Charlie to be able to say the words he needed to. "I want more of this and more of…"
"Yeah?" Neville's breath tickled Charlie's skin.
"It's been three years almost. Aren't you tired of hiding it? Us?" If there is an 'us'. I can't even say there is. I don't know what you want.
"Everyone says I look happier than ever and want to set me up on dates."
"Oh." Charlie's stomach ached again and the longing which was starting to subside was back. How was he misinterpreting this entire situation?
"It's been difficult to keep it to myself. The reason I feel so good; the reason I'm happy is because of you. I know we don't see each other often and this might mean nothing to you-"
"It means everything to me," Charlie said quickly. "I want more than a casual owl and a shag. Not because I want some sort of long term commitment or whatever. I want to be able to see you more. Take you places. Tell my family…"
"Charlie, I don't know-" Neville sounded anguished and Charlie didn't know if he was pushing too much. But he needed to. He needed them to be more.
"I don't mean tomorrow. I…could you think about spending a weekend away with me? Or maybe staying at my place for a few days? Leave your things here…Or I could come to yours… I could show you how good we could be if it's not a series of one night stands. Unless…"
Why had Charlie not even thought about this? Had he seriously been so stupid? So blind?
"You're involved with other people or you pull-"
"Don't be daft," Neville said, shaking his head. "I haven't been with anyone else. I hadn't been with more than one person before Sebastian and not since you… That's why I don't-I can't-"
"I'm not going to leave you like that. I mean, you've told me you don't want to get married. I'm not asking for a marriage proposal. I'm saying I want to be able to have a lazy Sunday with you. I want to introduce you to my friends, and no, the dragons don't count."
Neville laughed before kissing Charlie's neck. "Is it crazy I think if you start loving me, I don't know if I can handle it when you'd stop?"
If I start? Charlie kept the thought to himself for a long minute. "I already love you. Love you being here. Love us like this."
Neville needed to hear it. Charlie felt it in his bones. Neville needed to be told he was special and they'd be so much more because Neville deserved that.
Finally, Neville pulled back to look at Charlie, and his fingers raked through Charlie's hair. Without any desire to continue their conversation, Charlie kissed him. They'd talked enough for the night and maybe they'd talk more in the morning over breakfast. Right now? Charlie needed to pour all the love he had for Neville in that kiss - in whatever they would do next.
So he did.
The next night, Neville returned with a small trunk of his things to leave at Charlie's. As the days continued, Neville stayed more and more. Eventually, he never left again.
Two years later, they had a small ceremony by the beach in Rio. No big wedding, no family, no fuss. Just them and a beautiful sunset.
Two people who fell in love and stayed as such for years to come.
This entry was originally posted at
https://digthewriter.dreamwidth.org/707895.html. Thanks for reading