(Untitled)

[1926bentley]

Drawing off of the paranoia in the Mansion and the fact that you can't go a week without seeing a crackplot happen (though they have been infrequent lately), a certain joke has been set into motion

Comments

[priceless_flaw]

Phedre makes her way cautiously past a vase that say, 'THIS WILL GIVE YOU WEBBED FEET' and a pair of sweaty sneakers (?) lying under a chain with a similar sign of, 'THIS WILL GIVE YOU LARGER BREASTS.' After pausing for a scant second, she focuses on the only one she can see in the room at the moment.

"Flash bastard?" She queries, sauntering over to the man and frowning at him. "I don't believe I've met you. Why would you voluntarily want to be a flash bastard?"

[1926bentley]

Crowley puts a startled sort of expression on his face, and going along with the spirit of the day, quirks an inquiring eyebrow. "What do you mean? I don't want--"

He trails off for a moment, eyes falling on the sign on the sofa. "--I didn't see that there. I suppose I'll have to carry on as usual, then. It's a difficult task being a flash bastard, but someone has to do it."

[priceless_flaw]

Phedre narrows her eyes, biting her lip before peering more closely at the man. "My next question, of course, is what is a 'Flash Bastard'? Who are you, haven't I seen you before?" The lovely woman, of course, doesn't so much demand answers as insinuate that this is knowledge she should possess but has merely slipped from her mind.

She brushes her hair back from her shoulders and takes a seat in a, thankfully, unmarked chair quite nearby. "Did you see anyone place all of these?" She eyes the sneakers again, seeming to contemplate whether the risk was worth it.

[1926bentley]

"I'm Crowley," he offers, still lounging on the couch. "And no, I would tell you if I knew, but I have no idea who did this."

[tartanineffable]

Aziraphale is just passing through (aren't they always?) when he happens to notice, on a nearby table, a silver tray, containing a fresh, steaming pot of tea, a plate of almond biscuits, and a well-filled sugarpot, labelled 'DRINKING THIS TEA WILL TURN YOU INTO A SOUTHERN PANSY.' He gives it a long, slow look, then turns and looks at the demon and the couch behind him.

"Really, my dear."

[1926bentley]

Crowley flashes him a deliberate grin, at the same time attempting (and not quite successfully) to look innocent. "What? Why don't you try it?"

[tartanineffable]

"Obviously, I already have." He takes a careful seat on the couch, choosing to ignore any possible danger of ensuing flash bastardry - and lo, he's totally safe. Still one hundred percent pansy, no flash bastard here. "Your sense of humor has gotten, if possible, even more puerile than before."

[1926bentley]

"Oh, lighten up. It's April Fool's." Crowley pauses for a moment, sitting up. "Not that every day isn't reason enough to do something like this, but today I actually have a legitimate excuse."

[illgotten]

Mordred pauses at the first sign, eyeing it skeptically. Pauses, then -- what the hell, life has been quiet lately, and he's got a boyfriend back whom it's always fun to scare -- picks up the teddy bear to which it's attached.

Nothing, of course, happens. He tosses it up and catches it a couple of times. "False advertising," he announces. "I demand a refund."

[1926bentley]

Typist: omg you stole the PB I wanted for Crowley. DDDD:

Crowley glances at the teddy bear, at the sign, at Mordred -- and there's a faint smirk on his face now. "Unless there's something you're not telling us."

[illgotten]

"You impugning my masculinity?"

[1926bentley]

"No, not at all." He eyes the sign again, more serious now. "You know, I didn't think people would actually want to touch any of the objects."

[callmestargirl]

Stargirl makes her way over to Crowley and flops onto his lap, with such ease it could be assumed that she's done it for years and years.

"Hello, Flash Bastard."

[1926bentley]

There's a startled look for an brief second, and then Crowley just looks annoyed.

"Hi," he says dryly. "Comfortable?"

[callmestargirl]

"Quite."

[1926bentley]

"Now that we've got that figured out -- go away."

[o_i_am_slain]

*is very much avoiding the potted plant with the sign "THIS WILL SET YOU ON FIRE"*

*muttering to himself* Well, well, 'tis only fortunate that someone has seen fit to warn us all of these dangers.

typist: he's not been set on fire in a while, has he? I haven't been keeping him that active.