Author: Hikaru Del Sogno
Fandom: DB5K
Pairings: Changmin x Junsu (MinSu), Yoochun x Junsu, Yunho x Jaejoong
Genre: Romance, Angst
Rating: PG
Disclaimer: They are not mine.
Changmin froze. His heart hurt so much.
Junsu removed Changmin’s arms from his body, and turned to face the heir.
“Changmin-ssi,” Junsu sighed, “I don’t know what we still have to talk about with each other, but this is not the time. It’s almost 1:30 in the morning. You’re not supposed to be here.”
“Junsu-yah…”
Changmin called the name pleadingly but Junsu would have none of it. The pianist continued like he hadn’t heard.
“Why are you here? We’re not even friends. My place is undeserving for someone of your status. If someone sees us…”
“Who is gonna see us at this hour?” Changmin nearly shouted, his eyes couldn’t see anything because Junsu’s words had caused him so much pain.
At the same time, he suddenly remembered that in the past, it had always been him who was scared that someone might spot him with Junsu. For the same stupid fear he had even pushed Junsu away the last time Junsu had kissed him, that time when they separated.
Now Changmin would give anything just to get Junsu to kiss him again. But that was not going to happen. How ironic and deserving of him.
His eyes were stinging. He opened his mouth, trying to find words to say.
However, Junsu’s patience seemed to have run out. The pianist raised his voice to cover whatever that Changmin was about to utter. “Changmin-ssi, I’m tired. Mentally. Physically. I just came back and no matter what you think you are or what you think I am I have the right to rest. Even a dog has a right to rest,” he said with bitter sarcasm, “Now can you leave?”
Junsu’s tired eyes were full of an obvious determination to kick Changmin out.
Changmin wanted to shout to get Junsu to listen to him. He felt so sad and frustrated. But right then, his mind processed the “I’m tired” statement and he observed the apparent fatigue on the pianist’s face.
Junsu had apparently gotten even thinner than before. His skin seemed darker. His body reeked of sunburnt and the smell of travelling. Some months ago when they had still been with each other, Junsu had had some meat in his cute cheeks. Now they looked gaunt and tired.
Changmin’s heart felt like it was clenched by a fist. Wasn’t it his fault that Junsu had turned this way? He just had to ruin everything while Junsu deserved so much better. Would he quit being a jerk?
Changmin inhaled deeply. He then looked up at Junsu with peace-offering eyes. “Junsu, please. I’m sorry. I was just… worried. I didn’t know where you have been.”
“You were worried?” Junsu smiled, not a mocking one but it was obvious he didn’t believe a word Changmin said. “Why would you be worried?”
“Junsu, please…”
“Where was I?” the pianist watched his own feet, “Ethiopia. I was in Ethiopia. There, your curiosity is satisfied. Now can you leave?”
Changmin couldn’t find any word to say. Junsu clearly didn’t want him here. And Changmin didn’t have the heart to hinder Junsu’s hot shower and night rest any longer.
He said with all his care. “Sorry, for making you stay here for so long. You go and rest then. I will… see you later.”
Junsu shook his head. “But I don’t wish to see you.”
The heir managed appear unaffected. “Goodnight, Junsu.”
Junsu said nothing more. The pianist bent down to pull his luggage in, then with a small slam he closed the door. Changmin was left in the dark again. All he could see was a thin bright line at his feet, coming from Junsu’ apartment inside.
The light at the other side of the door. The light of his life.
Changmin massaged his temples. He walked down the stairs. Junsu had come back but it seemed to be no chance that Changmin could get the pianist back.
Then, Changmin scolded himself. For how much longer would he continue being selfish? All he had had in mind was about himself. Had he ever thought for Junsu? He had hurt Junsu too much; he wasn’t in a position to complain.
Junsu had looked so tired. Changmin wanted to hit himself for making Junsu that way.
He realized he had become so protective of the older man. He wanted to do something for Junsu. He wanted to tuck Junsu into bed, to hug the pianist, to sing lullabies for him.
But none of that could be accomplished right now. Junsu wouldn’t even let him step into the house.
What else could do for Junsu?
Junsu had just finished his shower when he heard the knock. First he hesitated. It might be Changmin again and Junsu didn’t want to see Changmin. But then it might be someone else, and anyway Junsu could always slam the door if it was the Shim heir.
Thinking so, he opened it.
A stranger was at the other side of the door. “Is this Junsu-ssi’s place?”
“Yes?” Junsu answered carefully.
The person took from his big bag some plastic boxes. “One serving of fish rice soup. One serving of tender salad. Have a nice meal.”
“What?” Junsu was confused. It was then that he realized the bag the person carried wore some restaurant name. “I didn’t order anything…”
“Junsu-ssi, someone ordered, and has paid for it already.” The other person insisted while looking at the watch at one of the hands still holding the boxes of food. He was obviously tired too, and Junsu didn’t have the heart to make him linger here, so he took them.
“Goodnight,” the delivery man said. Junsu said thanks and closed the door.
Food? Someone had ordered and paid for him?
An idea occurred to him. Junsu peeped through his window. He saw Changmin leaning against his white car on the front yard of the apartment building. One minute late the delivery man was down too, and Junsu saw him talking to Changmin in a few sentences. Changmin nodded.
Changmin had ordered the food?
The fish soup was hot inside the box and the delicious smell went through the plastic cell. The sweet and warming scent of rice and hot pepper and seasonings soon filled the whole apartment.
Junsu looked at the boxes. The name was of a very famous restaurant, as it sounded familiar. How had Changmin got them to make Junsu fish rice soup and salad and deliver them to Junsu’s door at this hour of the night?
Money? Influence?
Getting to this part, his mind automatically replayed what Changmin had said that day at the Park’s place.
“How many men have you gone to bed with? Seems like you have a thing for rich people, don’t you? Park Yoochun, Choi Siwon, me, who else? What's your reason? Money? Influence?”
Junsu shuddered involuntarily. He felt so disgusted and horrible, and was sure it wasn’t possible that he could swallow the food Changmin had sent him anymore.
If Changmin thought he could make Junsu come back to be his toy by using money and influence, then he was dead wrong.
“Can we do anything about it, professor Kim?” Changmin asked.
“No, I’m sorry. He failed the exam and the scholarship will be cut. Passing the exam with high scores is the rudimentary requirement for scholarship qualifications. We can’t do anything about it, Changmin…ssi.”
The provost addressed Changmin with some careful hesitation at the end, as he eyed the young man with cunning but discreet observance. Changmin had come to inquire about a student’s scholarship status. It was never appropriate for a student to know about such a thing (Changmin was still a student at the university) so the provost assumed Changmin came as a person from the firm that had donated millions to the school. Still, nothing had been declared so it had put the provost at quite an uncomfortable situation.
Shim Changmin, on the other hand, didn’t seem to think about that. He had simply walked into the office, requested a meeting with the provost, and now was deep in thought. Some minutes later, the Shim heir looked up at the provost and said, “Well, professor. If that’s the case, can we Shim Foundation pay for all his expenses next year? Would you be so kind as to not let Junsu know about this? Can you just let him think it’s still the scholarship?”
“Well,” the provost fixed his spectacles, “it’s hard. Junsu must know his scholarship has already been cut. But I will find a way.”
“Thank you professor,” Changmin said in relief. He needed to atone at least for Junsu’s studying at the conservatory.
It was essential that Junsu must not know. Scholarships weren’t just about money, they were also about certifying one’s capabilities. Changmin wanted Junsu to be as least affected by his failing the exam as possible. He wondered how the provost would cover it all so as not to let Junsu know.
But soon, he didn’t have to wonder anymore, because upon walking out he saw Junsu standing there, a look of disgust and hatred spreading on his face.
“Why would you do that?” The pianist inquired.
End 49