Is Using a Minotaur to Gore Detainees a Form of Torture?

[dave_littler]

I don't know if The Onion has recently hired some new writers or something, but a lot of their recent stuff has been awesomely cockpunching. Like a return to their glory days.

Comments

[thepolishhammer]

Minotaurs are by far some of the coolest mythical creatures ever. Even when they are unconstitutionally torturing terrorist detainees.

Also I prefer
"Cockpunchingly awesome"
to
"Awesomely Cockpunching"

Though it really is just a matter of preference.

[johhnymayhem]

'Cockpunchingly' does have a certain.. panache to it.

That's a word I'll have to spell in Scrabble.

[nerdfury]

That seals it. I'm contacting Artemis Security first thing Monday and asking for someone give me a quote for the Infinite Labyrinth option for my place, with optional Minotaur upgrade. And ball of string detectors!