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[charuby]

I'm 27 years old and single. I've had five boyfriends in the past. Four of those only lasted three months or less. The first boyfriend I ever had admitted to me that he's 90% sure he's gay and was using me to try and find out for sure. That really hurt. The second one said I wasn't intelligent enough for him and told me he wanted deep, intelectual

Comments

[mahasin]

Dating jerks.

Seriously, ugh, any guy or person who tells you that they are using you or that they don't think you are good enough in any way is an asshole and not worth your time.

I'm the same age as you (though I just turned 27) and there isn't anything wrong with you. I think that it's normal to compare your life to other peoples but it's one of those "if everyone jumped off a cliff would you do it?". Like some of my friends are buying home because they feel like it's the thing for them to do, but they can't afford them and I think long term, they're going to have a bad time.

I think you should keep doing what you are doing, enjoying your life, doing the things that you enjoy and you'll probably be able to meet someone who has the same interests and will treat you right.

Don't give up!

[topf]

I think relationships are really hard; it's specially hard finding that certain person just for you, perfect for this moment and good enough to make it last (even more: to make you feel like you can share the huge responsibility of marriage and having children with them

[racergirl7]

so, here is something that i have learned after being single for quite a while. you need to learn to be happy ALONE before you can be with someone else. i have felt all those things that you are feeling before, trust me. but, i moved out on my own and started focusing on me, and, when the time was right, i met the right person. you just have to be patient and, i guess, learn who you are, before you will meet the right person.

long comment is long

[porcelain_ocean]

So there are a couple things going on in your post, they're neither good nor bad, just things to be aware of. Lets break down the relationships from an outsiders view, then we'll look at where to go from here. Also, I want to remind you that everyone bats a zero until they don't. And you won't know if it's a zero until you're dead because long relationships blow up, people die, people grow apart, life happens and there's nothing you can do about it so enjoy whatever ride you're on. Anyways

long comment is long #2

[porcelain_ocean]

So you've had these relationships where you weren't terribly compatible with these people. And you've had a whole bunch of dates where you weren't compatible, but thought if you just keep going on dates you'll eventually land on a keeper. But that's not how it works - if you're dating just to date you're going to meet a whole bunch of people who aren't right for you. Because humans aren't made for every other person - if we were a) we'd be boring cookie cutters and b) we would be stuck with the first person we hooked up with. You have a unique constellation of likes, dislikes, wants, and needs. There is someone out there for you, but you have to know what you're looking for in a boyfriend to make that happen

long comment is long #3

[porcelain_ocean]

So, what to do now. First off: stop dating around. It's not getting you anywhere and it's making you crazy. Some people can date around and they love it, some people date around and they hate it. I'm one of those who hates it, so I spend a lot of time talking to people online before I even think about going out with them in real life. I might be talking to 3 or more guys at a time, but if they can't carry on a conversation for a couple weeks, then chances are we're not going to get along because I value communication

[winter_ruins]

So, I'm in almost the same boat as you. Continuing to date, people just not seeming interested in dating me even when I want to date them, etc. etc. It sucks, and it kind of beats you down and wears away at your self-confidence, and you just feel like your Not Good Enough, and you wonder why.

But I think it's something that most people go through. There's probably nothing wrong with you, it's just you haven't found someone who you really click with. Someone once told me that every relationship fails until one doesn't. Don't get down on yourself, maybe take a break from relationships and try not to put too much stock in having one (hard, I know), and just... well, live your life and maybe someone will wander into it who wants to share it with you.