Side Issues

[helfyrtwylite29]

Basically, my boyfriends roommate sent me an email that was rather vicious in my opinion. I'm debating whether I should forward it to him or not. I'm under no illusions that it'll necessarily help things between he and I but I'm not entirely sure how much/if it'll only hurt things between us more, not to mention between friends of ours and possibly

Comments

[scien]

So technically according to the rules I was supposed to reject this post for including whole lengthy emails/chats instead of just summarising as I requested. But once I read your link, OMG. I haven't laughed so hard in days, I couldn't possibly deprive everyone else of it. Wow. I don't know if I'd go with 'vicious' so much as 'hilariously, absurdly patronising

[winter_ruins]

Is it possible that J sent that e-mail? It seems so weird and out of the blue (as well as "Well, you're clearly the one cheat on J" and all this other stuff about J's personal feelings involving the child). I mean, he just might be a little out of touch (which I'm going on about how he spent almost two paragraphs going on about what astrological sign you must identify with), but it seems a lot like either J asked him to, or J's been complaining so much to that dude that the dude took matters into his own hands.

I'd, personally, talk to J about it, but I'd be prepared for the worst possible outcome. Though, maybe take other, wiser people's advice before mine.

[scien]

Huh, now I'm wondering if I assumed the roommate was female because it was mentioned in a previous draft of this post or if that came straight from my imagination.

I'd be curious where the letter-writer got their information from too. It's one of the many things we don't know about the interpersonal connections in this situation!

[winter_ruins]

Ack. *J asked roommate to send e-mail, not that J sent it himself.

[ineverycolor]

I agree with that and I don't think it'd be out of line to show this email to the bf and see what his reaction is....

[helfyrtwylite29]

Sorry about the lack of detail. J is my boyfriend. Roommates are a female, her boyfriend and their child. She did indeed send the email, I received it over facebook

[scien]

Yeah, if this is how it is, I think the 'should I show him this email' question is just a distraction from the bigger questions here. And I agree, walking away from the relationship and attendent housemates sounds like ABSOLUTELY the right thing to do, oh my goodness. Get out of there :/

[ineverycolor]

I remember your previous post. Would have been good to add the link for that as well for other people reading: http://datinandrelatin.livejournal.com/2535013.html

I don't know what advice you want? It sounds to me like a lot of people are trying to walk all over you and take control of your life and you need to just decide what you think and what you want and what YOU BELIEVE is best for your baby. *big hugs*

[ineverycolor]

"also, i invite you to step into js shoes here. what options do you leave him, and what emotional reactions are you instigating? i feel. you are manipulating his moral fiber to your own ends and that is bad karma chica. he already feels obligated because in his mind he's failed his other children. ... and had it even crossed your mind that he may end up resenting you and possibly the baby, to even a subconscious degree because you have usurped a place in his life that he wishes his existing children could be?"

Wow. I want to slap her. Then he shouldn't be having sex if he's not prepared for the consequences it brings. Plain and simple.

[winter_ruins]

I also love the "no one who wasn't rich and successful ever had a child. Except for me. I made it work but you can't" mentality and the "no one who has ever disliked kids in the entire history of the universe has ever had a child they they love."