Comments | dancewithedevil: 3 [Accidental Video] Backdated to 4AM

dancewithedevil

3 [Accidental Video] Backdated to 4AM

Jul 17, 2011 08:33

[It was dark, terrifying, and in the distance the sounds of a million screams echoed off of the endless walls. Their cries for help, for mercy, were like distant memories. There was pain everywhere. Not just the pinpricks of being chained up, but of having every bone in your body broken only to be healed and broken again. The smell of burning flesh ( Read more... )

nightmares

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[Video] wingsandwill July 17 2011, 15:40:58 UTC

[He was already awake, so though the sudden screaming from his PCD startled him, that was all. Upon grabbing the device and glancing over the video, it was pretty obvious what had happened; nightmares were expected, but his main concern was the Wall.]

Sam?

[Video] wingsandwill July 18 2011, 06:10:43 UTC

[Have a knowing and unimpressed look.]

Of course he did.

[And then a confused one, from both the question and the staring. Sam usually didn't just stare like that.

And he hesitates a moment on answering, but it's not like his location's much of a secret by this point.]

The Temple. Why?

[Video-->offline] dancewithedevil July 18 2011, 06:17:38 UTC

Alright. I'll be there in ten minutes. I don't want to wake anyone else up.
[He wanted to be there in person to talk about this. That way you couldn't just turn off the PCD or something. So he breaks out his handy dandy map and walks over to the Temple. He decides to wait a minute or two outside before trying to stumble his way through inside a place he's never been while it was still dark outside.]

[offline] wingsandwill July 18 2011, 06:31:12 UTC

[Cas isn't sure why Sam wants to come over at 4AM but he's not complaining; maybe Sam just wanted the company, and he certainly didn't mind. So he's waiting near the front doors for when Sam arrives, the Temple near pitch-black as it has no electricity.

When Sam enters, he'll just melt out of the shadows in a good imitation of his usual appearing from nowhere flight.]

Sam.

[offline] dancewithedevil July 19 2011, 22:24:42 UTC

[Sam had mostly adjusted to Castiel coming out of nowhere, but this time it was different, silent. No fluttering of feathers followed his friend this time.]
Cas...
[He moved a little closer.]
Why didn't you tell me?

[offline] wingsandwill July 19 2011, 22:40:46 UTC

[At Sam's words, Castiel is suddenly concerned and a bit apprehensive. They were all powerless at the moment, so it doesn't cross his mind that Sam might be talking about his grace; he's much more worried someone had told Sam one of the many other, greatly more serious things that the younger Winchester had
yet to be filled in on.]

Tell you what?

[offline] dancewithedevil July 19 2011, 22:52:33 UTC

Your Grace...
[He takes another step closer. He knew that an angel's Grace was very important to them, even if he couldn't truly understand the gravity of losing it.]
Raphael told me that she ripped it from you. Why didn't you tell me?

[offline] wingsandwill July 19 2011, 23:02:30 UTC

[Oh. That. And since Sam wasn't freaking out, she must not have told him why, but that Raphael'd told him at all still angers Castiel. None of this was her business and she had no right to talk to Sam to begin with.

He doesn't move when Sam steps forward, except having to look farther up.]

I would have, I simply wanted to speak with you in person and needed to find a decent time.

[And he'd been concerned about the Wall, and stressing Sam out any more than he might already be being stuck here with Lucifer.]

[offline] dancewithedevil July 20 2011, 16:47:11 UTC

[He shakes his head a little. That would be the kind of response he expected from someone who was trying to avoid the situation. But right now he was more concerned with his friend's well-being.]

Any time would have worked for me Cas. All you had to do was ask to talk to me and I would have been there.

[offline] wingsandwill July 20 2011, 17:12:55 UTC

[He doesn't really want to talk about it at all He didn't want to explain what had happened and why. He didn't want to explain everything else, before it, either, but he knew he would have to.

Just not now.]

You had and have other things to be concerned with. I'm fine, and I have adjusted.

[Both were half-true, at least. And now subject change again, just like before.]

Have you gotten used to being here?

[offline] dancewithedevil July 20 2011, 17:32:38 UTC

[He grabs Cas by the shoulders.]
Cas, you're my friend. You've stopped pretty much whatever you've been doing when Dean and I needed you in the past, why wont you let me show the same courtesy?
[He lets go and turns away from a moment before running his hand through his hair and turning back. He got the feeling pushing wasn't going to work so well here.]
Yeah, I have. There are a lot of strange people here and I'm pretty much adjusted to that too. But Cas...
[He sighs.]
Will you tell me sometime? About what happened?
[He looks up.]
Keeping it all bottled up isn't healthy. And I don't know if you've talked to anyone else about it but I'm your friend, Cas. This kind of stuff is what I'm supposed to do.

[offline] wingsandwill July 21 2011, 02:39:34 UTC

[He's a little startled by being suddenly grabbed, a little more flighty and on edge lately after everything and being now mortal, but it's just Sam and so he doesn't protest. He's quiet while Sam talks and moves around, listening to what he's saying, feeling a mix of emotions he's not all that sure of. Some of it's guilt and apprehension and some of it's more positive and therefore more confusing. He really does appreciate what Sam's saying and offering, and after a moment of quiet he responds.]

I will, Sam. I want to tell you the entire story, but I don't think it would be a good decision to do so right now.

[Not just because the idea of telling Sam about the vision is nauseating, but because of the risk to the Wall.

Aside from all that, though, there are other things he both wants to say and doesn't want to. Mundane things, like the nightmares, and larger issues like how horrific the night of Tanabata had been for so many reasons. But it doesn't seem right to complain like that, especially not to Sam, and he could and would just ( ... )

[offline] dancewithedevil July 21 2011, 17:52:43 UTC

Okay. I get that. You're worried about me right? About the Wall?

[He slipped his hands into his pockets. Cas would need time. He knew that much. It didn't stop him from wanting to know, but he got the feeling that trying to find out from anyone else would only make him upset.]

Yeah, sure. Just...whenever you feel like talking. It doesn't even have to be anything big or life changing.

[offline] wingsandwill July 21 2011, 19:12:23 UTC

Yes. Simply with Lucifer here, you're at enough risk without adding more to it.

[Which was true, not just a convenient excuse not to explain everything, even if if it was that too.

At the offer to talk though, he hesitates a moment, because Sam might actually be able to understand and help, and he really doesn't want to ask anyone else anyway.]

Will the dreams ever stop? Not... Permanently, as I know they won't, but they're constant.

[offline] dancewithedevil July 21 2011, 23:36:11 UTC

[He understood where Cas was coming from so he didn't really push it anymore. He would give the once-angel time to tell him what happened on his own. Even if it was bugging him.]
Right. Don't want to crack the Wall or anything like that.
[Only a little bitter. Sam didn't like being treated like a china doll.]

You've been having nightmares too?
[He has mixed feelings on this one. Of course Cas would need sleep now that he didn't have his Grace, but nightmares? Why so cruel? But on the other hand it was a connection they could share, even if it made him feel terrible.]

There are ways you can lessen them. I know there are people here who have ways to help. And sometimes doing something that calms you before you go to sleep can help. Think happy thoughts. Things like that.

[offline] wingsandwill July 22 2011, 02:49:22 UTC

We don't know what will happen, Sam. It could be catastrophic and isn't worth the risk.

[He understands the bitterness, and even with the Wall he knows how strong Sam is. But taking an unnecessary risk is the last thing they should do.

He nods slightly at Sam's question, and honestly that he'd been having them didn't surprise him. He was billions of years old and had seen and been through so much it would've been almost ridiculous to expect not to, but they were still unsettling and disruptive.]

What sort of ways?

[He nods, trying to think of something that might be calming to do. He'd been able to sleep for the longest span of time yet after that horrendous 30-mile round trip walking to visit Gabriel, so maybe just wearing himself out utterly would work.]

I will try that.

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