Naruto Fic: Last Sunset

[damoyre_fics]

Title: Last Sunset
Pairings: Orochimaru/Kimimaro if you squint. ;)
Genre: gen, mild angst
Warnings: implied character death
Rating: G
A/N: Written for naruto100's drabble contest.
Challenge: First and Last
Bonuses: heat, hair, happinness
Wordcount: 263

Comments

[sharona1x2]

I love your Orochimaru. You always keep him in character.

[damoyre]

I love you SO much for this comment! I'm glad I was able to keep him IC, specially because I've been on a BoG roll and I had such a hard time switching gears from my "crack humor" to this.

I wanted to write a drabble for naruto100, but all I could hear in the background was Chazz and Jimmy calling each other names, and Chazz demanding that I write more ice skating pr0n. @__@

Orochimaru was not amused. ;)

[tomoe_daeva]

;__;

Poor Kimi ;.;
Orochimaro/Kimimaro is such a splendid pairing but also so sad T_T

[damoyre]

You're right. It is SO sad. I'd like to write a happy story for them... but I'm not sure how. LOL

I might try to tackle a long story that starts when they first meet. :)

Thank you for reading! <33333

[momoiro_usagi]

That was SO sad, but so very good, too! <3 I love the way you write Orochimaru, and your short, simplistic style is VERY effective!! Nice job!! <3

And I'm glad to see Kimimaro getting some fanfiction love! :/ He's one of my favorite characters, but he's SOOOO underrated, which makes me very sad! Thanks for writing this and posting! :3

[damoyre]

I was really struggling to make this succint, to keep the drabble as close to 100 words as possible. (I must have cut at least half of the original draft and I still failed, considering the wordcount. LOL) I'm very glad it still worked for you.

I love writing Orochimaru, so I'm happy that you liked him. <333

And thank you for reading and commenting. :)

[momoiro_usagi]

Yeah, keeping drabbles close to 100 words is REALLY, REALLY challenging, but you did a great job! <333 It's short, but it conveys so much meaning!

Yay Oro-chan! :) I need to try writing him sometime! I think he's the only Akatuski (or former Akatsuki) that I haven't written yet! :/

[damoyre]

Oooh! Akatsuki makes me happy in my pants, but unfortunately I've never written any of them. ;-;

I hope you get to write Orochimaru soon. <333

[arlo_arleh]

This is so in-character and so melancholic its just.... just... brilliant! Somehow you've manage to convey such raw emotion in so few words, it just works so well as a short piece :)

One of the best drabbles I've ever read *thumbs up from me*

[damoyre]

I'm so glad the feeling came through in this. Short, as it is. :)

Thank you for the kind comments. <3333

[vivianedanglars]

I agree with all those who said that's well written but mosto of all in character. Orochimaru is an interesting character because he's evilness but he's not all this far from human feelings such like hatred, sadness, envy and fear. So you make a very good job in my opinion keeping his awesomness (u_u) but also his most "common" features. I believe this fic is perfect. Not unnecessary feelings.

I especially liked that:

there was wisdom in his silence, never a wasted word. His smiles, when they came, seemed like accidents, nature's work...

and obviously this part:

It was a pity. Such a waste of talent, a perfect jewel tarnished and ruined. And Orochimaru found himself averting his eyes from Kimimaro's face. Kimimaro was Death, Orochimaru's most despised enemy, the only one he truly feared.

Kimimaro was Death... I think you got the point. Really isn't it interesting the fact that Kimimaro would willingly give Orochimaru all he had, but he found himself uncapable of it, he found himself to represent what his master truly feared?