Closed: Sabrina, backdated - post date

[daleysebastian]

Sebastian was not a paranoid person. Granted, sometimes he happened to disappear from an entire country when it seemed like he'd been made as a werewolf. Sometimes he made less than idle threats if he happened across someone where they shouldn't be. Most times he refused to talk to anyone because of what they might figure out. Every full moon,

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[daleysabrina]

When Sabrina made it home that night she was practically floating, having to tear herself from Dean after their fourth goodbye- or maybe it was the fifth, actually, before slipping inside. It was late, much later than she had intended to come home, but time just seemed to slip away from the both of them. Though, Bri wasn't the type of ever watch the clock and adhere to any sort of schedule, when she had been a student at Hogwarts she was late to nearly every class

[daleysebastian]

"I can't." It was purely desperate, barely short of a whine. In any other situation, Sebastian might be pretending he hadn't sounded like that or that it was on purpose.

Now, though, it was purely incidental and emotional.

"I have to know. I need to know. If it wasn't them, fine, great. I'll be glad, really." That would mean she hadn't been, essentially, raised by a feral cult, completely beyond her knowledge. "But I still have nightmares, Sabrina. I still see it. And someone needs to pay for that." There would never be a steep enough price for destroying their lives - their whole world - but someone was going to pay, no matter how much later it was. "Someone's responsible. And I have to know who."

[daleysabrina]

"And you don't think I have nightmares? I was thirteen, Sebastian! And I crawled out that window and every time I closed my eyes I wasn't sure if I'd ever open ten again-"

She was just as desperate as he was now, the words coming out all at once and pulling together. This wasn't something that she talked about, not once or ever. When she had first gotten to the camp she had been too scared, and then she realized that it was the strongest pack members that made something of themselves.

Sabrina may have been a complete ball of energy but she was intelligent. A leader did not show weakness.

But now her voice cracked, unable to stay strong around her brother who had let her crawl into bed with her so many times as a child, her own nightmares pulling her awake. She was older now but she missed the simple luxury of a big brother with a bigger bed to soothe her fears.

[daleysebastian]

Sebastian might be terribly out of practice as a big brother - and being comforting in general, if you asked him - but he'd never been able to watch Sabrina get upset.

This was something they shared, a pain they'd had to cope with essentially alone since it happened. Sebastian might be used to that, but it broke his heart a little bit more that Sabrina had had to.

"I know." He closed the distance between them, a heavy breath escaping through his lips. As soon as he was close enough, he grabbed her arm to pull her into a hug, arms tight around her slight shoulders. "It wasn't easy for either of us." And must be worse for her. She'd been so much younger at the time.

[daleysabrina]

No matter how strong she was or how angry with him she had become, there was no way that she could resist completely melting into the arms of the big brother she had cried over for the last ten years, missing him so much that broke her heart every day until the moment she realized he hadn't died.

She had always looked up to him, turning to him for comfort before ever thinking about Samantha or their parents when she was younger.

"Please, I need to put it behind me. I can't spend anymore time thinking about it," she told him, her face buried into his chest now as the tears welled up.

"I hate it. I hate knowing- knowing that dad died because of me."

[daleysebastian]

Things were far more serious than any situation that had led to him protecting her and doting on her. They hadn't really addressed this, not since Sabrina had found her way home.

Sebastian brushed his hand over her hair, smoothing down the frizzy mess. No matter how upset he might be, how bewildered at her naivety, how hurt he was on his own, he'd always push that back enough to hug her tighter before pulling back, just enough to look at her.

"It wasn't because of you. That wasn't your fault. Nothing was your fault."

[daleysabrina]

"It was because of me," she sighed, blinking up at him with glassy eyes.

What Sabrina experienced she wouldn't call nightmares, not when what she was seeing had actually happened to her before, the same moment over and over again. The screams still filled her head, the bitter chill creeping over her skin, and the wild look in her father's eyes-

"He came back for me, Sebastian. Dad died because I was too scared to hide-"

[daleysebastian]

"You were thirteen," he stressed. "You had nothing to do with that. They would have killed him anyway. I only made it because I play dead well."

Even at seventeen with much less life experience, Sebastian had been able to tell the wolves were only going to stop when they'd coated everyone in enough blood to make sure living wasn't a valid option.

"If he hadn't come for you, they would have." His smile was sad, eyes a little watery. "It's Dad. He wouldn't have ever regretted it as long as you made it."

[daleysabrina]

Everything had happened all at once and the Daleys barely had a chance to react before the wolves were on them, blood and gore everywhere. Sabrina had been so frightened that she couldn't move, watching her family die with wide eyes. That was, of course, until her father had pushed her towards the open bedroom window.

"Bash- they did come for me-"

Sabrina turned them, pulling up the oversized shirt just enough for him to get a good look at the wide stretch of scars along her lower back.

When she ran her fingers over the scars she was amazed that they hadn't torn her in half-

"So really, what was the point?" she asked him, turning back around. "He died for nothing."

[daleysebastian]

His breath stuttered a little, catching in his throat. He'd become intimately acquainted with his own bite scar over the years, but he'd always had the perk of never having to look directly at it like he was now.

"But they didn't kill you," Sebastian emphasized. "That's what he died for. To save you. To distract them from you. That's worth everything. He'd have done it for all of us if he could."

[daleysabrina]

"Well, maybe he shouldn't have-" she started, her voice tired and frustrated.

Sabrina rubbed at her temples, her face all twisted up as she tried to make sense of exactly what she was saying, the worst falling from her lips before she had a chance to think them through.

Everything was getting all jumbling up inside of her.

"What did he die for? For you to be alone and for me to-"

To what?

Live?

The tears welled up inside of Bri, the memory of just how gentle Dean had been with her overwhelming all over again. It choked her up.

[daleysebastian]

"I don't think this is what he wanted, no," Sebastian said softly. Usually, he wasn't one for soft voices and gentle touches. But here he was, squeezing her shoulder gently to make sure he had her attention.

"But he gave you a chance. The rest? That's on me. For not finding you." He'd run, been too terrified to do much else. When they hadn't found Sabrina's body, he'd accepted it when he'd been told that werewolves sometimes like to drag off their kill. It was part of the taunt, the game. That had made it worse, but he'd thought she was dead instead of looking for her like he should have. "He wanted you to have a life. That's what he wanted."

[daleysabrina]

"Dad didn't want this," Sabrina told him firmly, her head tilted up as she met his gaze.

It still amazed her how familiar his eyes looked, no matter how much time had passed or his face had changed, those brown eyes of his were the exact same as she remembered them being.

She had recognized him right away.

And yet- who was she anymore? Her own brother had no idea.

"I haven't had a life, Bash. I belong to them-" Her voice was low and much more serious than she ever let it. "I belonged to Nolan and he made sure I knew it."

[daleysebastian]

His first inclination was to argue. She didn't belong to them, the could have a life now. That all started to sound a little empty when the implications of he made sure I knew it clicked.

"Bri, what do you mean?" He needed to ask, needed some kind of clarification before he snapped and decided going to Azkaban for murder would be worth it. "He made sure you knew it?"

[daleysabrina]

Sabrina blinked and took a step back from him, shocked by her own admission. The words had spilled out so quickly that she didn't know what she was saying, getting too worked up over memories that she'd spent a decade burying and choking down.

"What? No- Forget it," she said quickly, rubbing at her own arm. Her voice trembled softly, that thumping building behind her eyes again.

"I um- no. It's okay."

She just had to forget.

[daleysebastian]

"With that reaction? No, it's really not." Sebastian reached out as if to touch her arms but stopped before the touch connected. He didn't want her to feel trapped or boxed in, not when it was obvious that was what was happening for her entire life.

He should have fucking looked for her years ago.

"You can tell me anything, you know that right?"