So I did as
Vilakins suggested and downloaded the most recent version of the Gimp. This all went swimmingly, but I noticed while reading the requirements, that I needed a more fashionable version of X11 to run it.
Off I went to the X11 site, and cheerfully proceeded to download that as well, noting as I did so that this required OS X 10.5.7, something I was sure I didn't have.
I checked. I didn't. I had 10.5.6.
So off I trot to Apple and I say "Give me 10.5.7, for there is software and I have need of it!"
And Apple says, "No. Bugger off."
And I say, "Er... what?"
"No," says Apple, "You can't have it."
"Any particular reason?"
"Doesn't exist."
"But... the other softwares told me it did!"
"They were lying."
...
"I'm pretty sure they wouldn't do that to me."
"Oh yeah? Well I heard they didn't like you. I heard they were just stringing you along."
...
"Look," I said, feeling a bit desperate by now, "I think we got off on the wrong foot here. Can you please just return me the link for 10.5.7?"
At this point, things got nasty. Apple's search function got right up in my face. "I told you to leave it out!"
I backed away. Whatever it was covering for it was probably best I didn't get myself involved.
Several hours later, K came bounding downstairs two at a time like an excited little puppy. "There's a new update for Apple!" He exclaimed. "10.5.7! You should go get it!" He paused and added, "But probably not in the first couple of days. It's bound to be a bit buggy." And he bounded off again.
Apple hurt me. It really did. After all those times I defended it and the number of people I've convinced to give it a go? And this is the thanks I get? I'm not sure I entirely trust it anymore. You can never get that back. Never.
And then the toaster caught fire this morning. The whole house, once again, smells charmingly of charcoal.