In That First Moment ~ Chapter 7
In That First Moment ~ Chapter 1
In That First Moment ~ Chapter 2
In That First Moment ~ Chapter 3
In That First Moment ~ Chapter 4
In That First Moment ~ Chapter 5
In That First Moment ~ Chapter 6
Edward
Edward ran. He knew Bella should be faster than him, and expected her to pass him up any moment. Hunting newborns tended to give themselves over entirely to their sense of smell, but she was a good twenty yards back. He wondered if she was being careful. He’d noticed her trip over the desk as a human - maybe she just wasn’t used to her new sense of balance? Then again, perhaps she was still a bit of a klutz. He thought of the flash of stomach now visible beneath the fraying top she wore, and ran a little faster.
He caught the mountain lion swiftly and drained it without any sense of satisfaction. But he’d expected that. He forcibly restrained the despair from registering in his expression. He’d given in before, and it had taken years before animals seemed to satisfy him again. He fully expected it would take a solid decade before the taste of her blood was far enough removed from his immediate memory to allow him any enjoyment in normal hunting. Or what passed for normal, with his family. It would be longer, still, before every little activity he attempted stopped reminding him of how completely he’d failed this girl. When he was finished, she helped him dig the grave without comment, and then looked at him expectantly. For the millionth time, he wondered what she was thinking.
“Another?” she asked, when he said nothing.
Edward shook his head. It wasn’t like they were going to be back near civilization any time soon. He saw an expression he didn’t recognize cross her face. “What is it?”
“I have a long way to go,” Bella admitted reluctantly. “I need three elk before the burning turns to an itch, and another if I want it just to feel dry. I don’t know how I’ll ever be able to live among people like you did.”
Edward smiled at the irony of her wishing for his level of restraint, after it had just proved so far from the ideal. “You will.” She looked up at him hopefully, and he suddenly felt very protective of her, as he had in the lunchroom, hearing Jessica Stanley’s ungracious thoughts. “I’m starting over, too, so we’ll work on it together.”
At least now he was reassured that she wanted to learn this way of life. As they walked back toward the house, as slowly as if they were human, he was grateful for that. Emmett had had an alarming thought earlier, and Edward had been paying attention. He found whenever her name was thought or spoken, he couldn’t help but pay attention. Emmett had worried that maybe Bella wanted to leave because she didn’t see the value in the life they’d chosen. Maybe she didn’t see the need to be a ‘vegetarian’. But Edward was sure, now, that she didn’t want to be the monster he had been to her. That was a relief. He’d resolved almost at once that he was going to help make sure she would never have to feel that kind of guilt. And he couldn’t very well keep that resolution without leaving his room.
“So, you like to read,” Edward began, trying to keep her talking. He’d heard her voice less and less over the last few days. That hadn’t escaped his notice either.
“Yes. All Carlisle’s books seem to be medical texts, though,” she replied.
“We can order you something more entertaining today if you want,” he offered, but she looked away as though the idea made her uncomfortable. It was immensely frustrating that he didn’t know why that would be. Her reactions were never what he expected them to be. “You’d rather not?”
“You’ve all been very generous with me already.”
“Actually, almost everyone thinks generosity is YOUR gift to us,” Edward said quietly. That seemed to get her attention. Her eyes turned back toward him very quickly.
“When Carlisle turned Esme and later Rosalie, it was because they were dying. Esme had fallen off a cliff, and Rose had been hurt badly by other humans. Carlisle was their only chance at survival - if you can call it that. Esme forgave him, but it took a few months. Rosalie still hasn’t quite forgiven Carlisle. She said the words after about twenty years, but sometimes she’s still bitter.”
He watched her processing this with no indication what she could be thinking. He tried not to dwell on the reality that she had NOT been dying. He’d taken away her life for no better reason than because he’d lost control…and yet she’d forgiven him. Then he stopped walking abruptly and turned on the spot. A new scent had caught his attention, and he felt foolish for not noticing it sooner. If he hadn’t been so intent on figuring out Bella’s strange behaviors…
“What is it?” she asked, turning as well.
“Do me a favor, and climb a tree,” he replied shortly, in the quietest voice possible. He was listening hard, and not just with his ears. They’d caught his scent about the same time he’d caught theirs, but she’d been heard.
There’s more than one, Sam. He could hear their minds already. They were close.
Bella had turned to look at the nearest tree, but hadn’t yet moved. The first branch was quite a ways up, and he wondered if she doubted her ability to reach it. “GO!” he hissed. He was still watching when she jumped for the first branch and hauled herself up onto it. He’d meant for her to go all the way to the top, where her scent wouldn’t be noticed. If he was lucky, they wouldn’t think to look for her in the trees, in case this went badly.
Two large wolves came toward him almost as soon as she was off the ground, and the stench was overpowering. He was grateful that they didn’t notice her, and he resisted the urge to look up at her. They’d be able to reach her if she stayed on the first branch, though. He bit down on the worry. “Hello, Sam.”
The largest wolf was gazing at him malevolently, and Edward could hear his thoughts as clearly as if he’d spoken aloud. Just wait, Paul, when I go in -
“Both of you wait, please,” he said, cutting off the wolves’ exchange. He remembered how the pack communicated, knew that Paul was the wolf circling behind him, growling. But he let Paul leave his line of sight, trusting in their surprise that he could hear them to delay any action. It worked.
You can hear us?
“Yes.”
You broke the treaty, bloodsucker. Edward was about to reply when another voice, further away but tied to the consciousnesses of the wolves, put in a thought.
It wasn’t one of ours they killed. Why does it matter? Come home, guys.
Behind Edward, Paul snarled in response to this new thought. “Yes,” Edward answered anyway, shifting his focus to Paul, though he tried to maintain a respectful tone with Sam, whom he knew was the Alpha. “It was an unfortunate accident, and none of the others were responsible.” At least he could prevent them from going after the rest of the family. He felt a renewed wave of disgust at himself. ‘Unfortunate accident’ didn’t even begin to do it justice.
Sam, why are we listening to this? Who cares of it was an accident? Paul was demanding, growling all the while.
“You’re listening because there are more of us than there are of you. I broke the treaty, but we immediately left the area. You’re in our area now, and if you kill me the treaty will be gone beyond all recall. There are only three of you - not enough to handle even half of us.”
He had a moment’s warning, the ghost of a thought. But today you’re all alone. Then both the wolves launched themselves at him at once. He caught Sam by his outstretched paws, throwing him sideways, and twisting away to avoid the back claws that would have shredded his clothing, even if they couldn’t damage his stony flesh. Then he turned to see why Paul hadn’t reached him yet, and was shocked at what he saw.
Bella had jumped down from the tree between him and Paul, and he’d landed right on her, overbalancing them both. They’d toppled to the ground together, but the instant he’d touched her, Paul had resumed his human form. As Edward watched, Paul scrambled up, too shocked to be properly afraid. Naked and vulnerable, he looked at Edward first, then Bella, who was still getting to her feet, his expression of surprised disbelief mirrored on her face as she quickly turned her eyes away from her attacker. It occurred to him that she might never have seen a naked man before, and he grinned. An instant later, Sam morphed as well. He had shorts tied to his ankle with a bungee cord, which he hastily donned. Paul followed suit.
“Well that changes things,” Sam said cautiously. She looks different from the posters, but the features are the same.
“It doesn’t change anything!” Paul exclaimed, shaking with rage. “They turned Chief Swan’s daughter into one of them.”
At this, Edward saw Bella take a step back as if she’d been struck. “You know Charlie?” she asked quietly. The werewolves ignored her. He remembered the way his human memories had come back to him piecemeal after his transformation. Probably this was the first reminder she’d had of her family. That would certainly explain why she’d seemed to be taking things so well, thus far. If they got out of this alive, she might decide she wasn’t ready to forgive him after all, but he put the thought aside as soon as it occurred to him. It was all moot, if the wolves were intent on killing them today. He wondered how long it would be before Alice brought the others.
“That’s not what I mean, Paul. She forced you to change back, somehow. How’d you do it?” Sam asked coldly, his dark eyes never leaving Bella, who was already shaking her head.
“I don’t know. I just wanted to keep him from hurting Edward.”
“Edward’s dead. He broke the treaty when he bit you,” Paul spat.
“That wasn’t his fault.”
“Isabella,” Sam said quietly, “If he hadn’t been in Forks, you’d still be alive. Charlie wouldn’t be working himself to exhaustion trying to find you. Our ancestors were wrong to make the treaty in the first place.” His voice was soft from the beginning, but he trailed off at the end, and Edward caught his thought. We’ll have to kill her, too. She can’t be trusted now.
He roared and charged at Sam, putting forth no effort to contain his rage. He had him in less than a second, and before another had passed, he would have been pulling him apart like an old napkin, but Bella was screaming. “NO! Edward, don’t!”
Sickened, he threw Sam to the ground, mostly unharmed. Paul circled widely around them to help him up, but Sam was already on his feet. “Sam, you can’t win this battle. Please don’t make us do anything else we don’t want to,” Bella pleaded. “It’s been hard enough, you can’t imagine how hard. Please just go home.”
Edward could hear Sam reevaluating the situation. He could have killed me before I was even able to phase. She can force us into our human forms. And there are six others that might arrive any second. He exchanged a glance with Paul, who looked more shaken than angry, for once. Edward waited for them to come to some conclusion.
“The treaty will have to be redrawn,” Sam said finally. “Forks is too close to our land for your kind to live. We’ll want a thousand mile radius from now on.” Maybe that will keep the others from phasing.
Edward nodded, though he knew Esme would be crushed. She loved Forks. “We can agree to those terms. You know where to find us, when the document is ready. I’ll inform Carlisle.”
Paul was angry again already. Edward could hear the abuse the young werewolf was thinking at him, but he ignored it, waiting impatiently through the tense silence. At last, Sam nodded and they began backing away. When they were out of sight, he heard them phase and begin their run home. As soon as they resumed their wolf forms, a third line of thought registered in his head.
Sam? Paul? Thank God! I was so worried when you vanished. Are you alright?
Edward turned toward Bella. She looked a sight. Her shirt was torn from her first high-speed chase, and her gorgeous brown hair was tousled and full of snow from rolling on the ground with a naked werewolf. He swallowed, surprisingly nervous. Sam’s decision to kill Bella had forced him to acknowledge a reality he’d been avoiding while he hid in his room. He cared about her. Profoundly. Thinking back, he realized this was why the monster had stopped looking her in the eye, and part of the reason he’d sunk so deeply into depression for what he’d done to her. She was watching him as he walked over. He gently pushed her hair back over her shoulder, shaking out a little of the snow. “Are you alright?” he asked, when he thought he could control his tone.
Chapter 8
In That First Moment ~ Chapter 2
In That First Moment ~ Chapter 3
In That First Moment ~ Chapter 4
In That First Moment ~ Chapter 5
In That First Moment ~ Chapter 6
Edward
Edward ran. He knew Bella should be faster than him, and expected her to pass him up any moment. Hunting newborns tended to give themselves over entirely to their sense of smell, but she was a good twenty yards back. He wondered if she was being careful. He’d noticed her trip over the desk as a human - maybe she just wasn’t used to her new sense of balance? Then again, perhaps she was still a bit of a klutz. He thought of the flash of stomach now visible beneath the fraying top she wore, and ran a little faster.
He caught the mountain lion swiftly and drained it without any sense of satisfaction. But he’d expected that. He forcibly restrained the despair from registering in his expression. He’d given in before, and it had taken years before animals seemed to satisfy him again. He fully expected it would take a solid decade before the taste of her blood was far enough removed from his immediate memory to allow him any enjoyment in normal hunting. Or what passed for normal, with his family. It would be longer, still, before every little activity he attempted stopped reminding him of how completely he’d failed this girl. When he was finished, she helped him dig the grave without comment, and then looked at him expectantly. For the millionth time, he wondered what she was thinking.
“Another?” she asked, when he said nothing.
Edward shook his head. It wasn’t like they were going to be back near civilization any time soon. He saw an expression he didn’t recognize cross her face. “What is it?”
“I have a long way to go,” Bella admitted reluctantly. “I need three elk before the burning turns to an itch, and another if I want it just to feel dry. I don’t know how I’ll ever be able to live among people like you did.”
Edward smiled at the irony of her wishing for his level of restraint, after it had just proved so far from the ideal. “You will.” She looked up at him hopefully, and he suddenly felt very protective of her, as he had in the lunchroom, hearing Jessica Stanley’s ungracious thoughts. “I’m starting over, too, so we’ll work on it together.”
At least now he was reassured that she wanted to learn this way of life. As they walked back toward the house, as slowly as if they were human, he was grateful for that. Emmett had had an alarming thought earlier, and Edward had been paying attention. He found whenever her name was thought or spoken, he couldn’t help but pay attention. Emmett had worried that maybe Bella wanted to leave because she didn’t see the value in the life they’d chosen. Maybe she didn’t see the need to be a ‘vegetarian’. But Edward was sure, now, that she didn’t want to be the monster he had been to her. That was a relief. He’d resolved almost at once that he was going to help make sure she would never have to feel that kind of guilt. And he couldn’t very well keep that resolution without leaving his room.
“So, you like to read,” Edward began, trying to keep her talking. He’d heard her voice less and less over the last few days. That hadn’t escaped his notice either.
“Yes. All Carlisle’s books seem to be medical texts, though,” she replied.
“We can order you something more entertaining today if you want,” he offered, but she looked away as though the idea made her uncomfortable. It was immensely frustrating that he didn’t know why that would be. Her reactions were never what he expected them to be. “You’d rather not?”
“You’ve all been very generous with me already.”
“Actually, almost everyone thinks generosity is YOUR gift to us,” Edward said quietly. That seemed to get her attention. Her eyes turned back toward him very quickly.
“When Carlisle turned Esme and later Rosalie, it was because they were dying. Esme had fallen off a cliff, and Rose had been hurt badly by other humans. Carlisle was their only chance at survival - if you can call it that. Esme forgave him, but it took a few months. Rosalie still hasn’t quite forgiven Carlisle. She said the words after about twenty years, but sometimes she’s still bitter.”
He watched her processing this with no indication what she could be thinking. He tried not to dwell on the reality that she had NOT been dying. He’d taken away her life for no better reason than because he’d lost control…and yet she’d forgiven him. Then he stopped walking abruptly and turned on the spot. A new scent had caught his attention, and he felt foolish for not noticing it sooner. If he hadn’t been so intent on figuring out Bella’s strange behaviors…
“What is it?” she asked, turning as well.
“Do me a favor, and climb a tree,” he replied shortly, in the quietest voice possible. He was listening hard, and not just with his ears. They’d caught his scent about the same time he’d caught theirs, but she’d been heard.
There’s more than one, Sam. He could hear their minds already. They were close.
Bella had turned to look at the nearest tree, but hadn’t yet moved. The first branch was quite a ways up, and he wondered if she doubted her ability to reach it. “GO!” he hissed. He was still watching when she jumped for the first branch and hauled herself up onto it. He’d meant for her to go all the way to the top, where her scent wouldn’t be noticed. If he was lucky, they wouldn’t think to look for her in the trees, in case this went badly.
Two large wolves came toward him almost as soon as she was off the ground, and the stench was overpowering. He was grateful that they didn’t notice her, and he resisted the urge to look up at her. They’d be able to reach her if she stayed on the first branch, though. He bit down on the worry. “Hello, Sam.”
The largest wolf was gazing at him malevolently, and Edward could hear his thoughts as clearly as if he’d spoken aloud. Just wait, Paul, when I go in -
“Both of you wait, please,” he said, cutting off the wolves’ exchange. He remembered how the pack communicated, knew that Paul was the wolf circling behind him, growling. But he let Paul leave his line of sight, trusting in their surprise that he could hear them to delay any action. It worked.
You can hear us?
“Yes.”
You broke the treaty, bloodsucker. Edward was about to reply when another voice, further away but tied to the consciousnesses of the wolves, put in a thought.
It wasn’t one of ours they killed. Why does it matter? Come home, guys.
Behind Edward, Paul snarled in response to this new thought. “Yes,” Edward answered anyway, shifting his focus to Paul, though he tried to maintain a respectful tone with Sam, whom he knew was the Alpha. “It was an unfortunate accident, and none of the others were responsible.” At least he could prevent them from going after the rest of the family. He felt a renewed wave of disgust at himself. ‘Unfortunate accident’ didn’t even begin to do it justice.
Sam, why are we listening to this? Who cares of it was an accident? Paul was demanding, growling all the while.
“You’re listening because there are more of us than there are of you. I broke the treaty, but we immediately left the area. You’re in our area now, and if you kill me the treaty will be gone beyond all recall. There are only three of you - not enough to handle even half of us.”
He had a moment’s warning, the ghost of a thought. But today you’re all alone. Then both the wolves launched themselves at him at once. He caught Sam by his outstretched paws, throwing him sideways, and twisting away to avoid the back claws that would have shredded his clothing, even if they couldn’t damage his stony flesh. Then he turned to see why Paul hadn’t reached him yet, and was shocked at what he saw.
Bella had jumped down from the tree between him and Paul, and he’d landed right on her, overbalancing them both. They’d toppled to the ground together, but the instant he’d touched her, Paul had resumed his human form. As Edward watched, Paul scrambled up, too shocked to be properly afraid. Naked and vulnerable, he looked at Edward first, then Bella, who was still getting to her feet, his expression of surprised disbelief mirrored on her face as she quickly turned her eyes away from her attacker. It occurred to him that she might never have seen a naked man before, and he grinned. An instant later, Sam morphed as well. He had shorts tied to his ankle with a bungee cord, which he hastily donned. Paul followed suit.
“Well that changes things,” Sam said cautiously. She looks different from the posters, but the features are the same.
“It doesn’t change anything!” Paul exclaimed, shaking with rage. “They turned Chief Swan’s daughter into one of them.”
At this, Edward saw Bella take a step back as if she’d been struck. “You know Charlie?” she asked quietly. The werewolves ignored her. He remembered the way his human memories had come back to him piecemeal after his transformation. Probably this was the first reminder she’d had of her family. That would certainly explain why she’d seemed to be taking things so well, thus far. If they got out of this alive, she might decide she wasn’t ready to forgive him after all, but he put the thought aside as soon as it occurred to him. It was all moot, if the wolves were intent on killing them today. He wondered how long it would be before Alice brought the others.
“That’s not what I mean, Paul. She forced you to change back, somehow. How’d you do it?” Sam asked coldly, his dark eyes never leaving Bella, who was already shaking her head.
“I don’t know. I just wanted to keep him from hurting Edward.”
“Edward’s dead. He broke the treaty when he bit you,” Paul spat.
“That wasn’t his fault.”
“Isabella,” Sam said quietly, “If he hadn’t been in Forks, you’d still be alive. Charlie wouldn’t be working himself to exhaustion trying to find you. Our ancestors were wrong to make the treaty in the first place.” His voice was soft from the beginning, but he trailed off at the end, and Edward caught his thought. We’ll have to kill her, too. She can’t be trusted now.
He roared and charged at Sam, putting forth no effort to contain his rage. He had him in less than a second, and before another had passed, he would have been pulling him apart like an old napkin, but Bella was screaming. “NO! Edward, don’t!”
Sickened, he threw Sam to the ground, mostly unharmed. Paul circled widely around them to help him up, but Sam was already on his feet. “Sam, you can’t win this battle. Please don’t make us do anything else we don’t want to,” Bella pleaded. “It’s been hard enough, you can’t imagine how hard. Please just go home.”
Edward could hear Sam reevaluating the situation. He could have killed me before I was even able to phase. She can force us into our human forms. And there are six others that might arrive any second. He exchanged a glance with Paul, who looked more shaken than angry, for once. Edward waited for them to come to some conclusion.
“The treaty will have to be redrawn,” Sam said finally. “Forks is too close to our land for your kind to live. We’ll want a thousand mile radius from now on.” Maybe that will keep the others from phasing.
Edward nodded, though he knew Esme would be crushed. She loved Forks. “We can agree to those terms. You know where to find us, when the document is ready. I’ll inform Carlisle.”
Paul was angry again already. Edward could hear the abuse the young werewolf was thinking at him, but he ignored it, waiting impatiently through the tense silence. At last, Sam nodded and they began backing away. When they were out of sight, he heard them phase and begin their run home. As soon as they resumed their wolf forms, a third line of thought registered in his head.
Sam? Paul? Thank God! I was so worried when you vanished. Are you alright?
Edward turned toward Bella. She looked a sight. Her shirt was torn from her first high-speed chase, and her gorgeous brown hair was tousled and full of snow from rolling on the ground with a naked werewolf. He swallowed, surprisingly nervous. Sam’s decision to kill Bella had forced him to acknowledge a reality he’d been avoiding while he hid in his room. He cared about her. Profoundly. Thinking back, he realized this was why the monster had stopped looking her in the eye, and part of the reason he’d sunk so deeply into depression for what he’d done to her. She was watching him as he walked over. He gently pushed her hair back over her shoulder, shaking out a little of the snow. “Are you alright?” he asked, when he thought he could control his tone.
Chapter 8