Current State: Terrified!
I'm back from the fair - it was wet. Four-ish hours in the rain, and mist, and that weird coming-at-you-sideways mist. All on about three hours of sleep.
Why didn't I get more sleep the night before? Knowing I was going to have a busy day, why didn't I plan ahead? You may scoff, but I'll let you know that I did get to bed early. And then sat there, staring at the ceiling, turning over every five minutes. Maybe it was the caffeine-acetaminophen pills I took for my headache, or maybe it was me thinking it was the caffeine, and what really kept me up was psychosomatics. The point is: I couldn't fall asleep. This, of course, isn't new or noteworthy. The interesting part is what happened next.
I started thinking. Not about anything important, like the upcoming semester or (lack of) money, no, nothing as annoying as that. I started thinking about fandom, about my shows, my favourite characters and pairings. Then I started to write. In my head. I had been working on something just before bed, and I was continuing it in my mind. It seemed perfect, exactly what the story needed, and the whole thing was unspooling in my head. And I was actually kind of pissed; I couldn't sleep, but I wanted to, I knew I shouldn't do anything that would keep me awake, but I didn't want to lose what felt like the perfect ending to my fic.
I gave up. Switched on the light, tossed away my pillow, rolled onto my stomach, grabbed a small notebook and proceeded, for the next four hours, to write the (almost-)end to a Spike/Greg Flashpoint fic. And I'll tell you right now, even after four hours I didn't really have all that much material, nor any idea how to attach what I had begun earlier that day to what I wrote this morning in the dark. But whatever the fuck it is that I just produced, I'm oddly attached to it. I haven't looked at it since I closed the notepad and slid it away, and I've tried not to imagine the last bit I still need to finish.
But I will. I will finish it. If I say it here and now, I will have no choice. This fic must be finished. And I'm going to have to be the one to finish it! (Gee, that was fun.)
Also, it just happens to be the dirtiest thing I've ever written, an honest to God NC-17, and I have no idea where the fuck it came from.
[Please see post title.]
Also, and this is TOTALLY unrelated, I clicked the 'Detect Location' button, and it said "Canada, Granges". LJ thinks I'm on Saltspring Island. lol
Why didn't I get more sleep the night before? Knowing I was going to have a busy day, why didn't I plan ahead? You may scoff, but I'll let you know that I did get to bed early. And then sat there, staring at the ceiling, turning over every five minutes. Maybe it was the caffeine-acetaminophen pills I took for my headache, or maybe it was me thinking it was the caffeine, and what really kept me up was psychosomatics. The point is: I couldn't fall asleep. This, of course, isn't new or noteworthy. The interesting part is what happened next.
I started thinking. Not about anything important, like the upcoming semester or (lack of) money, no, nothing as annoying as that. I started thinking about fandom, about my shows, my favourite characters and pairings. Then I started to write. In my head. I had been working on something just before bed, and I was continuing it in my mind. It seemed perfect, exactly what the story needed, and the whole thing was unspooling in my head. And I was actually kind of pissed; I couldn't sleep, but I wanted to, I knew I shouldn't do anything that would keep me awake, but I didn't want to lose what felt like the perfect ending to my fic.
I gave up. Switched on the light, tossed away my pillow, rolled onto my stomach, grabbed a small notebook and proceeded, for the next four hours, to write the (almost-)end to a Spike/Greg Flashpoint fic. And I'll tell you right now, even after four hours I didn't really have all that much material, nor any idea how to attach what I had begun earlier that day to what I wrote this morning in the dark. But whatever the fuck it is that I just produced, I'm oddly attached to it. I haven't looked at it since I closed the notepad and slid it away, and I've tried not to imagine the last bit I still need to finish.
But I will. I will finish it. If I say it here and now, I will have no choice. This fic must be finished. And I'm going to have to be the one to finish it! (Gee, that was fun.)
Also, it just happens to be the dirtiest thing I've ever written, an honest to God NC-17, and I have no idea where the fuck it came from.
[Please see post title.]
Also, and this is TOTALLY unrelated, I clicked the 'Detect Location' button, and it said "Canada, Granges". LJ thinks I'm on Saltspring Island. lol