IAM- Ch 7/8
Chapter 7: EPILOGUE
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"Wow... I'm speechless... This is great." Mika said, it was a compliment. I smiled. She wiped the tip of her eye with her index finger. "Why don’t you just quit your medicine profession then became a writer?"
I laughed. "One day... I'm really sure to do it."
"I have a question."
"Hmm?"
"I remember you told me, about Pi requesting you to write a HAPPY" she emphasized the last word, I smiled. "Stories... but on your fiction, why is it all of them are sad? I almost cried you know!"
"Why?" I said proudly. "Did I ever have a happy ending with Pi? I think it’s better for all the stories to end in tear-jerking... to be fair enough."
"This is epic... You even used his friends as the characters of your story... You're hilarious... and as for the plot, you even got it from his dramas... but you’re so cool... it’s so awesome... you make a twist on each one of them." She sighed and we giggled breathlessly. We gave high five to each other. She must be really happy.
"Even the title really suits your story, 'Illusions and memories'. The first five chapters were illusion while chapter 6, yes definitely the only memory..." She heaved a sigh and started flipping at the paper. Her happy aura immediately changed. She cleared her throat, “but, don’t you think you're kind of irrelevant?"
"Huh? Why?" I got perplexed.
"You’re in love with a memory! Chiaki! Pi left this world, one year ago... yet in these stories, you're relieving your memories with him... how are you suppose to move on?!"
"Mika... I'm trying my best... and... Memory is a way of holding onto the things you love, the things you are, and the things you never want to lose... Pi and I... our relationship was never the perfect one, we always fight, I cannot even remember any memories that we snuggled each other or do what a normal couple do... for me, all those memories are perfect, no matter how the outcome is." I gave her a half smile. I am not angry with her, in fact she's right. I know I have to move on. But what can I do? My mind is still occupied with his memories.
"Gomen ne, Chiaki... I'm pushing you too much... I'm just concerned; you've been in total daze ever since... It's like your drowned, and lately, just lately, half a year ago, you're struggling to the surface... catching your breath... your life..." she held my hand look at me intently, "he's gone forever... he won’t be back... move on."
I know... I really do know.
___
I got back from the hospital and walked slowly on the hallway. Remembering what had happened from the exact day of last year. Last year, I was crying... But now, I’m trying to smile. I passed by the locker room and stopped as I saw the janitor doing his duty.
"Merry Christmas." I greeted him with enthusiasm.
"Merry Christmas Chiaki-sensei!" I smiled and walked again. I unzipped my bag and get the headset from bag. I placed one on the left. "SENSEI!"
I looked back, it was the same janitor. He jogged closer to me, I grinned at him confusedly. "y-yes?"
"I was cleaning under the locker of the staffs then I found this. It had your name on it."
"Thanks." I turn the black envelope, and then I saw my name... and his name?? "Huh? What’s this? Is this really for me? It has the name of my boyfriend, but he's dead over a year ago."
He shrugged his shoulders, "maybe it has been stuck up there for almost a year too?"
___
I stayed on my office for a while, actually I'm off duty today, I just wanted to go and find peace here. I sat on my chair and I placed my bag on the top of my table.
I tore it out and to my surprised I saw the same recorder he used to me before and a card. Confused, I plugged the headset on my ears. And I opened the card. I pressed the middle button.
“Take me out tonight. Where there’s music and there’s people, and they’re young and alive. Driving in your car. I never never want to go home. Because I haven’t got one. Anymore…~" I chuckled until I realize I was crying. "I bet that song was encrypted on both of our brains. Anyway, here's your letter! You pesky girl." he laughed. It made me smile, I missed his voice. "I've recorded it too, to show you my effort. I hope you won’t complain this time... Chiaki… We met on such circumstance, I believe its fate. I hope you believe it as well... I know we always fight with each other, but I guess it’s a common nature between people in a relationship. I know I’ve never been a good boyfriend to you. After I met your father, it was a total knock on my head. I know he doesn’t like me. That's why I tried my best to prove myself to you, especially to him... So I've work hard on everything." He giggled like a girl; I chuckled and wipe my eye. "I’m embarrassed… but… I save up some money... coz... I want to marry you… I want you to be the mother of kids and I love you... I wish I could say it better, but that’s how I feel. And I know you like me too, that’s all we need. Will you marry me? Chiaki, will you?"
I burst in tears. I started to sob until I can’t breathe any longer.
"Held your breath, just call me once you've got this, and then I’ll fly to your side." I heard him chuckled lightly. "I want to see and hear your reaction live... no matter what it is... so, I’ll wait for you... Jaa-ne. (see you)"
His voice faded like that. Then 'ee byul mot han ee byul' started to played on the background music. I cried much more.
I pluck my phone from my bag and dialed his number.
"Hi this is Yamashita Tomohisa, my phone is either dead or I’m on unrestricted area. Leave a message after the beep and I'll call you ASAP... BEEP"
"Pi... You said you'll be wait for my answer right?... Gomen ne... I'm one year late... but... Yes, I'll marry you... So what are you waiting for? Come back and fly to me..." I stop and I realized something. I’ve kept him waited for a year already; I should do the first move this time. I shook my head and sniffed. I smiled. "iie (no), never mind. I'll come and find you... I'll be sure to... I'll come to your side... wait for me..."
___
You, my delicate love, hold my hand
Come back to me like delicate flower song
And smile