(no subject)
Karkat lands on his face in a brightly lit room. Between the impact and the dazzling light and the disorientation of suddenly slamming back into his own timeline, which has been paused and waiting for him with months, he's not sure if he blacks out or not; if the flickering images of Terezi and Jade are real fragments from the dreambubbles or just guilt and head injury.
He's... oh, what the fuck.
♋♋♋
He's in an inn. There is no other word for it; this is not a transitional dwellstem, it is a rustic, old-fashioned inn, with rough wood beams and plaster walls and solid floorboards underfoot. There is a big pot full of money here, which he disregards; what does he need more boonbucks for now? No exits.
Where the fuck did this come from? It does not belong here, that's for sure. Someone built it, probably using Sgrub. He already figured Terezi and Sollux had expanded the place by doing that, but why would either of them build this, or a trapdoor to dump people into it?
Then he finds the note.
♋♋♋
It looks like something Terezi would make; one of her crappy modified drawings, and the quirk is hers. It's written in Gamzee's blood, and it sure would be great to believe she killed him and then wrote him this note at the bottom of a trap, inviting him to sloppy makeouts on the roof.
Yeah that seems plausible oh God. Oh man oh God oh man.
Gamzee told him, didn't he. Gamzee from the future, Gamzee from--Karkat checks the time on his crabtop. Gamzee right now, talking to Karkat 42 minutes in the past in a memo, is taunting him about how he is going to see their friends real soon. Talking about getting REALLY FRIENDLY with them. Wondering if Karkat will be able to be there to try and make him get his reconsider on.
Karkat whimpers.
♋♋♋
They are, Karkat thinks, pretty good last words. He makes a full confession to Jade, about how he gave her universe cancer and doomed both timelines, and for the sake of... something... he does it in the very memo that proves it, where he was talking to Jade and a future Kanaya, a future Kanaya from a future that will never be his future.
Jade doesn't respond, but that's fine, he's in full flow, eloquent in his self-pity and self-loathing and abject grovelling. He includes miscellaneous apologies to all the people he let down along the way, and is just about to wrap up and head for the roof and his execution when Kanaya, as usual, comes in and stomps blithely over his beautiful misery.
FGA: Sollux Is Okay
FGA: Hes With Me Right Now
PCG: HOLY SHIT
PCG: YOU'RE ALIVE
FGA: Hold On I Really Need To Change These Clothes
What.
♋♋♋
There is, of course, an explanation.
PCG: THAT IS NOT AN EXPLANATION
PCG: THAT ISN'T ANYTHING
PCG: THAT IS THE STUPIDEST...
PCG: HANG ON I AM GOING TO IM YOU AND DO THIS IN PRIVATE
PCG: I MEAN PAST YOU I GUESS
FGA: Yes Thats What You Did
FGA: Fortunately It Will Be Just As I Am Reading Myself Saying This In The Memo
FGA: Or Else There Might Be Some Confusion
PCG: YEAH THAT WOULD BE TERRIBLE
PCG: IF THERE WAS ANY CONFUSION
-- carcinoGeneticist [CG] started trolling grimAuxiliatrix [GA]
CG: KANAYA, I AM SO TORN. I AM GLAD YOU AREN'T LAZING AROUND BEING DEAD ON THE FLOOR ANYMORE WHEN WE HAVE SO MUCH SHIT TO DO, BUT I CAN'T SAY I APPROVE OF HOW YOU ARE DOING IT.
CG: THERE IS A STRICY POLICY AGAINST BECOMING A FICTIONAL CREATURE ON THIS TEAM. AND I AM SO FUCKING SICK OF YOU PEOPLE FLAUNTING IT. FAIRIES, WIZARDS, DRAGONS, RAINBOW DRINKERS.
CG: WHAT ABOUT ME. DON'T YOU THINK I WOULD LOVE TO RUN AWAY FROM MY RESPONSIBILITIES AND BECOME THE HUSK FAIRY, BRINGING CHILDREN SHINING CEAGARS IN EXCHANGE FOR THEIR SLOUGHED OFF SKINS? WOULDN'T THAT BE A NICE CHANGE FROM COWERING IN THE DARK?
CG: IT IS SELFISH. IT IS SELFISH AND TERRIBLE. AND I THINK YOU NEED TO GET ME OUT OF THIS HOLE IMMEDIATELY SO I CAN REPRIMAND YOU IN PERSON.
GA: Are You Quite Finished
CG: YEAH I GUESS.
GA: Because I Know The You Realize That As Much As I Idolize The Rainbow Drinker Mythology It Was Never My Intent To Become One
GA: And You Of Course Know By Now That I Would Not Just Abscond And Leave You To Deal With Things On Your Own
CG: EVERYTHING WAS FINE. I HAD IT FIRMLY UNDER CONTROL. QUIVERING IN A PIT AND BLUBBERING WAS ALL PART OF MY MASTER PLAN.
CG: YOU ARE MESSING THINGS UP HERE.
CG: I DON'T KNOW WHY I'M TYPING THESE STUPID THINGS.
CG: I JUST DON'T REALLY KNOW HOW TO DEAL WITH THIS.
GA: What Would You Have Me Do Then
CG: WELL LET'S START BY GETTING ME OUT OF THIS FUCKING HOLE. AND THEN... HOLD ON I AM USING MY SPONGE.
GA: Very Well
GA: ...
GA: Karkat?
CG: SORRY
CG: IT IS AN UNFAMILIAR SENSATION AND I MIGHT THROW UP.
CG: OKAY, LOOK, WE NEED TO ALL GET TOGETHER AND DEAL WITH THIS BEFORE THINGS GET ANY WORSE, THAT IS THE FIRST THING
CG: IF YOU ARE ALIVE THEN WE AREN'T DOOMED
CG: I MEAN CLEARLY WE ARE FUCKED BUT NOT INTRINSICALLY DOOMED, WHICH MEANS TACTICS ARE ACTUALLY CALLED FOR
CG: GAMZEE IS LEAVING ME THESE HORRIBLE TAUNTING NOTES ABOUT TEREZI. HE WANTS ME ON THE ROOF. AND IF TEREZI IS THERE SO IS VRISKA. YOU HAVE SOLLUX, DO YOU KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT THE OTHERS, SINCE YOU HAVE BEEN SCAMPERING AROUND UP THERE LETTING PEOPLE THINK YOU'RE DEAD AND TEARING UP A LITTLE IN A VERY MASCULINE AND DISCREET WAY?
CG: WHOOPS THE IDIOT STARTED TYPING AGAIN.
GA: I Have Not Seen Any Others In My Wanderings
GA: Except For Our Local Maniacs
GA: I Dealt With Gamzee and Eridan On The Roof Before I Met Up With
Sollux And Saw Vriska There As Well
GA: However I Lost Track Of Her Subsequently
CG: ...DEFINE DEALT WITH.
GA: I May Have Punted Gamzee Off The Roof
GA: Though If He Is Talking To You Currently
GA: Then I Did Not Do An Adequate Job
CG: HE IS LEAVING ME SHITTY NOTES CURRENTLY AND ALSO TALKING TO ME IN
THE PAST
CG: I MEAN PAST ME FROM PRESENT NOW
CG: CURRENTLY
CG: FUCK
CG: WHAT ABOUT THE HIPSTER?
GA: I
GA: Myself c3< Eridan's Torso c3< Eridan's Legs
CG: HOLY SHIT KANAYA
CG: MAYBE THIS IS A DUMB QUESTION BUT DO YOU THINK MAYBE BEING A VAMPIRE HAS MADE YOU MORE BLOODTHIRSTY?
CG: WOW THAT WAS DEFINITELY A DUMB QUESTION
GA: ...
GA: I Do Not Feel Any More Violent Than Normal
GA: But Eridan
GA: He
CG: YEAH
CG: IT'S OKAY
CG: I DON'T BLAME YOU
GA: I Could Not Stop Him When He Killed Feferi
GA: And It Was My Job To Protect The Matriorb
CG: I WOULD HAVE TO BE THE WORLD'S BIGGEST MOBILE LUMP OF SHIT TO SAY ANYTHING ABOUT IT, KANAYA, JUST STOP
CG: I UNDERSTAND
CG: I WAS THERE TOO AND I WAS COMPLETELY FUCKING USELESS
CG: I HAVE BEEN A USELESS PANICKY MORON FOR LIKE AN HOUR NOW
CG: BUT IT HAS TO STOP. USELESS STUPID PANICKING HAS TO STOP, THE KILLING HAS TO STOP.
CG: HOPEFULLY WE CAN CATCH TEREZI BEFORE SHE GETS VRISKA.
CG: AND GAMZEE.... I DON'T KNOW
GA: Head For The Roof Then
CG: I WILL THINK OF SOMETHING
GA: I Will Be There As Quickly As I Can With Sollux
CG: HAVE YOU
GA: And Aid You As I Can
CG: I KNOW THIS IS A LONG SHOT
CG: BUT HAVE YOU FOUND EQUIUS OR NEPETA? OR THEIR... YOU KNOW, HAVE YOU FOUND THEM?
GA: ...
GA: Karkat
CG: FUCK. I MEAN... FUCK.
CG: I JUST HAD TO CHECK
CG: I THOUGHT... I DON'T KNOW, THAT SHE MIGHT BE UNCONSCIOUS OR SOMETHING
GA: I Have Not Seen Either Body
GA: But Gamzee Had Nepeta's Blood On His Club And Claw Marks On His Face
GA: And He Had Taken
GA: Trophies
CG: FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK.
GA: I Am Sorry
CG: THIS IS ALL MY FAULT
CG: BUT I AM GOING TO FIX IT
CG: SOMEHOW
GA: It Is Not Your Fault
CG: I WILL SEE YOU ON THE ROOF
GA: But Yes
GA: I Will See You There
-- carcinoGeneticist [CG] ceased trolling grimAuxiliatrix [GA] --
♋♋♋
He's angry now. Angry, and trying desperately to come up with a plan. To start with, a plan to get out of this hole. Behind the plaster are the steel walls of the base. Can't climb up.
Think like Gamzee. How does a clown get out of a hole?
♋♋♋
The floor boards pry up pretty easily, using a sickle as a crowbar, and he punches easily through the plaster roof of the room below, which turns out to be a gift shop. Or Shoppe, according to the sign.
There are three doors; one is blocked. One is labelled OUTT. The other...
BAR, huh?
♋♋♋
00:00
He's... oh, what the fuck.
♋♋♋
He's in an inn. There is no other word for it; this is not a transitional dwellstem, it is a rustic, old-fashioned inn, with rough wood beams and plaster walls and solid floorboards underfoot. There is a big pot full of money here, which he disregards; what does he need more boonbucks for now? No exits.
Where the fuck did this come from? It does not belong here, that's for sure. Someone built it, probably using Sgrub. He already figured Terezi and Sollux had expanded the place by doing that, but why would either of them build this, or a trapdoor to dump people into it?
Then he finds the note.
♋♋♋
It looks like something Terezi would make; one of her crappy modified drawings, and the quirk is hers. It's written in Gamzee's blood, and it sure would be great to believe she killed him and then wrote him this note at the bottom of a trap, inviting him to sloppy makeouts on the roof.
Yeah that seems plausible oh God. Oh man oh God oh man.
Gamzee told him, didn't he. Gamzee from the future, Gamzee from--Karkat checks the time on his crabtop. Gamzee right now, talking to Karkat 42 minutes in the past in a memo, is taunting him about how he is going to see their friends real soon. Talking about getting REALLY FRIENDLY with them. Wondering if Karkat will be able to be there to try and make him get his reconsider on.
Karkat whimpers.
♋♋♋
They are, Karkat thinks, pretty good last words. He makes a full confession to Jade, about how he gave her universe cancer and doomed both timelines, and for the sake of... something... he does it in the very memo that proves it, where he was talking to Jade and a future Kanaya, a future Kanaya from a future that will never be his future.
Jade doesn't respond, but that's fine, he's in full flow, eloquent in his self-pity and self-loathing and abject grovelling. He includes miscellaneous apologies to all the people he let down along the way, and is just about to wrap up and head for the roof and his execution when Kanaya, as usual, comes in and stomps blithely over his beautiful misery.
FGA: Sollux Is Okay
FGA: Hes With Me Right Now
PCG: HOLY SHIT
PCG: YOU'RE ALIVE
FGA: Hold On I Really Need To Change These Clothes
What.
♋♋♋
There is, of course, an explanation.
PCG: THAT IS NOT AN EXPLANATION
PCG: THAT ISN'T ANYTHING
PCG: THAT IS THE STUPIDEST...
PCG: HANG ON I AM GOING TO IM YOU AND DO THIS IN PRIVATE
PCG: I MEAN PAST YOU I GUESS
FGA: Yes Thats What You Did
FGA: Fortunately It Will Be Just As I Am Reading Myself Saying This In The Memo
FGA: Or Else There Might Be Some Confusion
PCG: YEAH THAT WOULD BE TERRIBLE
PCG: IF THERE WAS ANY CONFUSION
-- carcinoGeneticist [CG] started trolling grimAuxiliatrix [GA]
CG: KANAYA, I AM SO TORN. I AM GLAD YOU AREN'T LAZING AROUND BEING DEAD ON THE FLOOR ANYMORE WHEN WE HAVE SO MUCH SHIT TO DO, BUT I CAN'T SAY I APPROVE OF HOW YOU ARE DOING IT.
CG: THERE IS A STRICY POLICY AGAINST BECOMING A FICTIONAL CREATURE ON THIS TEAM. AND I AM SO FUCKING SICK OF YOU PEOPLE FLAUNTING IT. FAIRIES, WIZARDS, DRAGONS, RAINBOW DRINKERS.
CG: WHAT ABOUT ME. DON'T YOU THINK I WOULD LOVE TO RUN AWAY FROM MY RESPONSIBILITIES AND BECOME THE HUSK FAIRY, BRINGING CHILDREN SHINING CEAGARS IN EXCHANGE FOR THEIR SLOUGHED OFF SKINS? WOULDN'T THAT BE A NICE CHANGE FROM COWERING IN THE DARK?
CG: IT IS SELFISH. IT IS SELFISH AND TERRIBLE. AND I THINK YOU NEED TO GET ME OUT OF THIS HOLE IMMEDIATELY SO I CAN REPRIMAND YOU IN PERSON.
GA: Are You Quite Finished
CG: YEAH I GUESS.
GA: Because I Know The You Realize That As Much As I Idolize The Rainbow Drinker Mythology It Was Never My Intent To Become One
GA: And You Of Course Know By Now That I Would Not Just Abscond And Leave You To Deal With Things On Your Own
CG: EVERYTHING WAS FINE. I HAD IT FIRMLY UNDER CONTROL. QUIVERING IN A PIT AND BLUBBERING WAS ALL PART OF MY MASTER PLAN.
CG: YOU ARE MESSING THINGS UP HERE.
CG: I DON'T KNOW WHY I'M TYPING THESE STUPID THINGS.
CG: I JUST DON'T REALLY KNOW HOW TO DEAL WITH THIS.
GA: What Would You Have Me Do Then
CG: WELL LET'S START BY GETTING ME OUT OF THIS FUCKING HOLE. AND THEN... HOLD ON I AM USING MY SPONGE.
GA: Very Well
GA: ...
GA: Karkat?
CG: SORRY
CG: IT IS AN UNFAMILIAR SENSATION AND I MIGHT THROW UP.
CG: OKAY, LOOK, WE NEED TO ALL GET TOGETHER AND DEAL WITH THIS BEFORE THINGS GET ANY WORSE, THAT IS THE FIRST THING
CG: IF YOU ARE ALIVE THEN WE AREN'T DOOMED
CG: I MEAN CLEARLY WE ARE FUCKED BUT NOT INTRINSICALLY DOOMED, WHICH MEANS TACTICS ARE ACTUALLY CALLED FOR
CG: GAMZEE IS LEAVING ME THESE HORRIBLE TAUNTING NOTES ABOUT TEREZI. HE WANTS ME ON THE ROOF. AND IF TEREZI IS THERE SO IS VRISKA. YOU HAVE SOLLUX, DO YOU KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT THE OTHERS, SINCE YOU HAVE BEEN SCAMPERING AROUND UP THERE LETTING PEOPLE THINK YOU'RE DEAD AND TEARING UP A LITTLE IN A VERY MASCULINE AND DISCREET WAY?
CG: WHOOPS THE IDIOT STARTED TYPING AGAIN.
GA: I Have Not Seen Any Others In My Wanderings
GA: Except For Our Local Maniacs
GA: I Dealt With Gamzee and Eridan On The Roof Before I Met Up With
Sollux And Saw Vriska There As Well
GA: However I Lost Track Of Her Subsequently
CG: ...DEFINE DEALT WITH.
GA: I May Have Punted Gamzee Off The Roof
GA: Though If He Is Talking To You Currently
GA: Then I Did Not Do An Adequate Job
CG: HE IS LEAVING ME SHITTY NOTES CURRENTLY AND ALSO TALKING TO ME IN
THE PAST
CG: I MEAN PAST ME FROM PRESENT NOW
CG: CURRENTLY
CG: FUCK
CG: WHAT ABOUT THE HIPSTER?
GA: I
GA: Myself c3< Eridan's Torso c3< Eridan's Legs
CG: HOLY SHIT KANAYA
CG: MAYBE THIS IS A DUMB QUESTION BUT DO YOU THINK MAYBE BEING A VAMPIRE HAS MADE YOU MORE BLOODTHIRSTY?
CG: WOW THAT WAS DEFINITELY A DUMB QUESTION
GA: ...
GA: I Do Not Feel Any More Violent Than Normal
GA: But Eridan
GA: He
CG: YEAH
CG: IT'S OKAY
CG: I DON'T BLAME YOU
GA: I Could Not Stop Him When He Killed Feferi
GA: And It Was My Job To Protect The Matriorb
CG: I WOULD HAVE TO BE THE WORLD'S BIGGEST MOBILE LUMP OF SHIT TO SAY ANYTHING ABOUT IT, KANAYA, JUST STOP
CG: I UNDERSTAND
CG: I WAS THERE TOO AND I WAS COMPLETELY FUCKING USELESS
CG: I HAVE BEEN A USELESS PANICKY MORON FOR LIKE AN HOUR NOW
CG: BUT IT HAS TO STOP. USELESS STUPID PANICKING HAS TO STOP, THE KILLING HAS TO STOP.
CG: HOPEFULLY WE CAN CATCH TEREZI BEFORE SHE GETS VRISKA.
CG: AND GAMZEE.... I DON'T KNOW
GA: Head For The Roof Then
CG: I WILL THINK OF SOMETHING
GA: I Will Be There As Quickly As I Can With Sollux
CG: HAVE YOU
GA: And Aid You As I Can
CG: I KNOW THIS IS A LONG SHOT
CG: BUT HAVE YOU FOUND EQUIUS OR NEPETA? OR THEIR... YOU KNOW, HAVE YOU FOUND THEM?
GA: ...
GA: Karkat
CG: FUCK. I MEAN... FUCK.
CG: I JUST HAD TO CHECK
CG: I THOUGHT... I DON'T KNOW, THAT SHE MIGHT BE UNCONSCIOUS OR SOMETHING
GA: I Have Not Seen Either Body
GA: But Gamzee Had Nepeta's Blood On His Club And Claw Marks On His Face
GA: And He Had Taken
GA: Trophies
CG: FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK.
GA: I Am Sorry
CG: THIS IS ALL MY FAULT
CG: BUT I AM GOING TO FIX IT
CG: SOMEHOW
GA: It Is Not Your Fault
CG: I WILL SEE YOU ON THE ROOF
GA: But Yes
GA: I Will See You There
-- carcinoGeneticist [CG] ceased trolling grimAuxiliatrix [GA] --
♋♋♋
He's angry now. Angry, and trying desperately to come up with a plan. To start with, a plan to get out of this hole. Behind the plaster are the steel walls of the base. Can't climb up.
Think like Gamzee. How does a clown get out of a hole?
♋♋♋
The floor boards pry up pretty easily, using a sickle as a crowbar, and he punches easily through the plaster roof of the room below, which turns out to be a gift shop. Or Shoppe, according to the sign.
There are three doors; one is blocked. One is labelled OUTT. The other...
BAR, huh?
♋♋♋
00:00