003 [Audio]

[consultcriminal]

[Inmate Filter]

Let's play a game. A secret game. The secret part is what you get when you win. Doesn't that sound fun? [He laughs softly.]We all have things we're not supposed to have. Now, I don't expect you to tell me what those things are. I know you won't and, honestly, I don't care. but we're all inmates here. Theft should be of little

Comments

[deepdowndark]

Who exactly are you, to demand we prove ourselves to you and present it as a game of all things?

I hope nobody bites. They'd be damn stupid to.

[consultcriminal]

It's not a demand. It's a suggestion.

But you're probably right. They would be stupid to try.

[deepdowndark]

But even asking it assumes some kind of arrogant assumption that we'll want to show you what good little criminals we are.

[consultcriminal]

Me? I don't have to judge. Find someone else to judge.

You can judge if you want. I'm just curious.

Filter

[gotgreenmagic]

This isn't an argument or a protest, it's a question: why would anyone halfway intelligent participate in this?

The better a 'toy' somebody has, the less likely it is you've got anything comparable to offer as a prize, so what you're asking people to do is make themselves vulnerable for...maybe no return at all.

Here's a thought: why don't you prove you've got something worth having first?

Private

[consultcriminal]

Ah, now that is the question, isn't it?

Private

[gotgreenmagic]

Aaaand that is not an answer.

Private

[consultcriminal]

You're quite right, my dear. But why should I show my hand so early? Like I said, it's just a casual sort of game for any who need something to do.

It seems the trend is to complain, react, and then complain again. I'm trying to break the dreadful monotony.

Oh ho ho A COMPETITION?

[youriseyoushine]

Feast your eyes, on THIS!

{Switching to video, shaky video, Fate clumsily scans the pipe organ in his front room. It's a staple in all villain lairs, you know. You should get one. After scanning its multiple boards and pipes, he turns the camera back on himself.}

What do you think of that?

WHAT IS THIS WIZARDRY?!

[consultcriminal]

[Sigh.]

It's wonderful. But was it stolen? Come now...there has to be a story behind it.

OF COURSE IT WAS STOLEN, YOU IDIOT

[youriseyoushine]

It was made from the best parts in from the best organs in all the world! Ladegast hammers, Aquincum stoppers, pipes of the finest brass from Hook & Hastings, and only the finest Scheulke flipples!

[consultcriminal]

I see. Well, we'll see if anyone else decides to challenge you.

[Unwise to mention games]

[expectremorse]

Poor showmanship.

It's Jim....he's not quite right...

[consultcriminal]

I wasn't aware that anyone was showing anything...

[SNERK.]

[expectremorse]

[He stares at him for a long moment before leaning close] If you're going to show someone you mean business or challenge them to a game...at least make an effort to instill some kind of fear.

[consultcriminal]

I would never do that! Why would I want people to fear me?

Inmate Filter

[consultcriminal]

Oh, just because the lot of you have forgotten what it's like to have fun doesn't mean you should impose it on me.