(no subject)
Title: Two Hundred and Ninety-Eight (Another Skyline Disappears)
Fandom/Pairing: JE, Ryo/Koyama
Rating: G
Summary: It's on the covers of all the tabloids. Too wild, should have never debuted, Johnny's mistake... Kanjani8 is put on hiatus.
A/N: Originally posted here as part of je_ficgames.
Nishikido is still in Tokyo when judgement is finally handed down, passed through proper channels and endless paper networks and spilled on television without Kanjani8 anywhere around. Nishikido thinks he's okay with their manager sitting there alone, in front of the bright lights and cruel questions, because it means he doesn't have to be the one fumbling with the wrong answers. He doesn't have to be the one to say that they'll be back, it's just a small suspension, wait for them, because he knows Kanjani8 is finally done.
Uchi's number has been flashing on his cellphone for two days, and he has two hundred and ninety-eight missed calls because he hasn't been answering since Shibutani called to tell him about Uchi's Mistake. Uchi's Mistake. Always capital with exclamation points and frills and whatever else loud punctuation can seep into Nishikido's head between all the beer cans.
He presses ignore again and finishes watching the commericals because he knows what's coming on next.
"What are you watching?" Koyama asks when the camera gets finished focusing on Nishikido's other manager, the manager Koyama barely knows anything about. He's fresh from the shower, water drops soaking the neck of his t-shirt; he's too busy playing with the clasp of his watch to really be paying attention.
"Kanjani8's eulogy," Nishikido says, and Koyama stops trying to snap his watch on to look at the television.
"What?" Koyama hasn't questioned why Nishikido's been hiding in his apartment for the past two days - he carries around his worry like a second skin, but he doesn't pry - so he has no idea what's happening when he looks at the screen and reads the scrolling text.
Koyama blinks and sounds kind of broken when it's over. "Why weren't we told about this?"
"You're being told now."
"What about NEWS?"
"What about it?"
"Are we being suspended, too?"
Nishikido shrugs because he doesn't know, doesn't really care. NEWS isn't Kanjani8, and in places in his heart that he pretends don't exist, he doesn't mind if NEWS crashes in the wake of Kanjani8's burnout.
*
Koyama spends hours doing Yamashita's job (because really, Yamashita doesn't care enough to try) by calling every higher up he can think of to get some answers and crying when no one picks up their phone because they're already busy dealing with Uchi's Mistake.
Nishikido sits beside him and drinks because there's nothing else he can do anymore, now that everything is ending. "You might as well give up. NEWS is probably over just like Kanjani8 is over."
Koyama's eyes are swollen and the glare is so out of place it almost makes Nishikido laugh for the first time in days. "I have to try."
"Why bother? No one cares."
"Our fans care."
"NEWS doesn't have fans. YamaPi has fans and he's wanted out since the beginning."
Koyama's eyes flash with hurt, and even though Nishikido is mocking everything Koyama's ever wanted, he still doesn't kick Nishikido out.
*
Koyama hides in his bathtub and Nishikido pretends he's anywhere besides hiding in Koyama's living room like a coward.
Not even a year, he thinks. Kanjani8 didn't even last a year. Their dreams, their rhythm, their wings, everything they had spent years building up to, it all lasted under a year. Two hundred and ninety-eight days of lights and sequins and most importantly, being debuted.
Nishikido watches the sun outside Koyama's window (because Koyama turned the television off and threw the remote across the room after press conference) and it's setting when Koyama finally says something loud enough for Nishikido to hear.
"I'm scared." Koyama's words seem loud in his ears, but Nishikido can't hear anything else of Koyama's conversation, not even the whispers of his tone.
Nishikido's scared, too. Scared of being stuck with something he's never wanted, something he's only put up with so his dream could come true. Scared of what he thought as the greatest thing in his life being over.
He turns his face away from the sun.
*
Koyama cracks open the bathroom door and crawls onto the couch after Nishikido pretends to be asleep for an hour. He pets Nishikido's hair until Nishikido uncurls his body and presses his nose against Koyama's collarbone.
"We have a meeting in the morning," Koyama says. "NEWS isn't being suspended. We're not being punished at all, besides losing a member."
Nishikido doesn't say anything.
"Kanjani8'll come back. It's just a hiatus."
"What if it's not?"
"It is, though."
Nishikido blinks, his eyelashes brushing Koyama's skin, and can't find a single reason to believe him.
*
Nishikido tries to pull out of Koyama's grasp when the sun starts coming back up, but Koyama's not asleep and he doesn't let go.
"We have a few hours until the meeting, go back to sleep," he murmurs, even though he knows Nishikido hasn't slept at all since he got the call. He strokes his hand down Nishikido's back.
"I'm not going to the meeting," Nishikido says.
"Of course you are."
"I'm not. I decided that without Uchi, none of this is worth it. I'm going to tell them I quit NEWS."
Koyama breathes in and stills, his fingers resting in between the notches of Nishikido's spine. "What are you going to do without NEWS during Kanjani8's hiatus? You're too old to hang around like a Junior."
Nishikido shrugs against him. "Kanjani8's over. I'll probably quit Johnny's."
Koyama's tone is blank and sensible when he finally speaks. "You can't afford to lose everything."
"I don't care anymore."
"NEWS needs you."
Nishikido clenches his fingers into fists, and Koyama doesn't say anything about how Nishikido's fingers dig against his skin because he knows NEWS is only second-best to Nishikido, something he does because it's his duty. Something he's never wanted to care about. Something that isn't going to hold him back.
"NEWS doesn't need anyone but YamaPi; you'll be fine without me."
"What if we don't want to be fine without you?"
Nishikido closes his eyes, and drops his hands from around Koyama's arm. "That's not a choice you get." He breaks away before Koyama can stop him.
"You leaving NEWS could end everything I've ever dreamed of." Koyama lays on his back and Nishikido can see Koyama's heart breaking on his face.
"You'll find a new dream," Nishikido says. He's already found his shirt and his shoes and he has his phone flipped open; now that he's decided, he's determined, and nothing's going to stop him, not even the glint in Koyama's eyes.
Nishikido slips out the front door and Koyama counts the minutes (all two hundred and ninety-eight of them) until he gets the call saying everything he's wished for, hoped for, prayed for, flew for, is over.
Fandom/Pairing: JE, Ryo/Koyama
Rating: G
Summary: It's on the covers of all the tabloids. Too wild, should have never debuted, Johnny's mistake... Kanjani8 is put on hiatus.
A/N: Originally posted here as part of je_ficgames.
Nishikido is still in Tokyo when judgement is finally handed down, passed through proper channels and endless paper networks and spilled on television without Kanjani8 anywhere around. Nishikido thinks he's okay with their manager sitting there alone, in front of the bright lights and cruel questions, because it means he doesn't have to be the one fumbling with the wrong answers. He doesn't have to be the one to say that they'll be back, it's just a small suspension, wait for them, because he knows Kanjani8 is finally done.
Uchi's number has been flashing on his cellphone for two days, and he has two hundred and ninety-eight missed calls because he hasn't been answering since Shibutani called to tell him about Uchi's Mistake. Uchi's Mistake. Always capital with exclamation points and frills and whatever else loud punctuation can seep into Nishikido's head between all the beer cans.
He presses ignore again and finishes watching the commericals because he knows what's coming on next.
"What are you watching?" Koyama asks when the camera gets finished focusing on Nishikido's other manager, the manager Koyama barely knows anything about. He's fresh from the shower, water drops soaking the neck of his t-shirt; he's too busy playing with the clasp of his watch to really be paying attention.
"Kanjani8's eulogy," Nishikido says, and Koyama stops trying to snap his watch on to look at the television.
"What?" Koyama hasn't questioned why Nishikido's been hiding in his apartment for the past two days - he carries around his worry like a second skin, but he doesn't pry - so he has no idea what's happening when he looks at the screen and reads the scrolling text.
Koyama blinks and sounds kind of broken when it's over. "Why weren't we told about this?"
"You're being told now."
"What about NEWS?"
"What about it?"
"Are we being suspended, too?"
Nishikido shrugs because he doesn't know, doesn't really care. NEWS isn't Kanjani8, and in places in his heart that he pretends don't exist, he doesn't mind if NEWS crashes in the wake of Kanjani8's burnout.
*
Koyama spends hours doing Yamashita's job (because really, Yamashita doesn't care enough to try) by calling every higher up he can think of to get some answers and crying when no one picks up their phone because they're already busy dealing with Uchi's Mistake.
Nishikido sits beside him and drinks because there's nothing else he can do anymore, now that everything is ending. "You might as well give up. NEWS is probably over just like Kanjani8 is over."
Koyama's eyes are swollen and the glare is so out of place it almost makes Nishikido laugh for the first time in days. "I have to try."
"Why bother? No one cares."
"Our fans care."
"NEWS doesn't have fans. YamaPi has fans and he's wanted out since the beginning."
Koyama's eyes flash with hurt, and even though Nishikido is mocking everything Koyama's ever wanted, he still doesn't kick Nishikido out.
*
Koyama hides in his bathtub and Nishikido pretends he's anywhere besides hiding in Koyama's living room like a coward.
Not even a year, he thinks. Kanjani8 didn't even last a year. Their dreams, their rhythm, their wings, everything they had spent years building up to, it all lasted under a year. Two hundred and ninety-eight days of lights and sequins and most importantly, being debuted.
Nishikido watches the sun outside Koyama's window (because Koyama turned the television off and threw the remote across the room after press conference) and it's setting when Koyama finally says something loud enough for Nishikido to hear.
"I'm scared." Koyama's words seem loud in his ears, but Nishikido can't hear anything else of Koyama's conversation, not even the whispers of his tone.
Nishikido's scared, too. Scared of being stuck with something he's never wanted, something he's only put up with so his dream could come true. Scared of what he thought as the greatest thing in his life being over.
He turns his face away from the sun.
*
Koyama cracks open the bathroom door and crawls onto the couch after Nishikido pretends to be asleep for an hour. He pets Nishikido's hair until Nishikido uncurls his body and presses his nose against Koyama's collarbone.
"We have a meeting in the morning," Koyama says. "NEWS isn't being suspended. We're not being punished at all, besides losing a member."
Nishikido doesn't say anything.
"Kanjani8'll come back. It's just a hiatus."
"What if it's not?"
"It is, though."
Nishikido blinks, his eyelashes brushing Koyama's skin, and can't find a single reason to believe him.
*
Nishikido tries to pull out of Koyama's grasp when the sun starts coming back up, but Koyama's not asleep and he doesn't let go.
"We have a few hours until the meeting, go back to sleep," he murmurs, even though he knows Nishikido hasn't slept at all since he got the call. He strokes his hand down Nishikido's back.
"I'm not going to the meeting," Nishikido says.
"Of course you are."
"I'm not. I decided that without Uchi, none of this is worth it. I'm going to tell them I quit NEWS."
Koyama breathes in and stills, his fingers resting in between the notches of Nishikido's spine. "What are you going to do without NEWS during Kanjani8's hiatus? You're too old to hang around like a Junior."
Nishikido shrugs against him. "Kanjani8's over. I'll probably quit Johnny's."
Koyama's tone is blank and sensible when he finally speaks. "You can't afford to lose everything."
"I don't care anymore."
"NEWS needs you."
Nishikido clenches his fingers into fists, and Koyama doesn't say anything about how Nishikido's fingers dig against his skin because he knows NEWS is only second-best to Nishikido, something he does because it's his duty. Something he's never wanted to care about. Something that isn't going to hold him back.
"NEWS doesn't need anyone but YamaPi; you'll be fine without me."
"What if we don't want to be fine without you?"
Nishikido closes his eyes, and drops his hands from around Koyama's arm. "That's not a choice you get." He breaks away before Koyama can stop him.
"You leaving NEWS could end everything I've ever dreamed of." Koyama lays on his back and Nishikido can see Koyama's heart breaking on his face.
"You'll find a new dream," Nishikido says. He's already found his shirt and his shoes and he has his phone flipped open; now that he's decided, he's determined, and nothing's going to stop him, not even the glint in Koyama's eyes.
Nishikido slips out the front door and Koyama counts the minutes (all two hundred and ninety-eight of them) until he gets the call saying everything he's wished for, hoped for, prayed for, flew for, is over.