FSL Exchange Fic for: vinegar_dog
Title: A Few of Chiana's Favorite Things
Rating: PG-13
Written For: vinegar_dog
Written by: dizzydame
Notes: John takes Chiana shopping.
Chiana bounces everywhere. She darts off, to and fro like a kid, disappearing from John's range of vision and then just as quickly coming back. He's used to it by now; she has the attention span of a five year old but she's clever enough to get herself out of most problematic situations that she gets herself into.
Okay, so maybe he does feel a little protective - but today, he's got a mission and it isn't babysitting.
*
The idea of a birthday party appeals to Chiana. Nebari don't celebrate the anniversary of a birth; neither do Luxans, or Hynerians, or Leviathans...
Or Sebaceans.
But the difference in Aeryn and everyone else is that John knows when she was born. He knows because a little file chip told him, and he plans on using that information to the best of his ability regardless of whether or not Aeryn actually wants him to.
Chiana latches onto the idea with an enthusiasm she rarely exhibits - a trip planetside, a chance to shop with currency that isn't hers... John has no doubt she'll pocket a few trinkets along the way but his moral ambiguity has grown along with his comfort at the concept of strolling through a marketplace full of weird, smelly, possibly dangerous aliens.
Right now nothing bothers him because he's a man with a plan, a plan to get Aeryn something that will knock her proverbial socks off. Something that will shock, bedazzle, and wow her speechless... or at least impress her enough that she doesn't knock him cold out the minute she realizes what he's doing.
Maybe he'd better plan on standing a few feet away, just in case.
*
"What about this?" Chiana asks, holding up a brightly colored bauble.
John leans in close to inspect it. Chiana's eyes are wide and the smile on her face lights it up. Inside the delicate globe of glass colors swirl and dance, a glittery substance that John can't name as quite smoke or quite liquid providing endless fascination.
It's the perfect gift, but not for Aeryn.
He shakes his head and she sighs and puts it back down, giving a longing look behind her and a more pointed one back at John.
He just laughs and grabs her arm. "Come on, Pip. We're not shopping for you."
Maybe he'll swing back around to the stall before they leave the planet, though. After all, the Nebari might not celebrate birthdays but there are some Earth traditions that Chiana would love and it wouldn't hurt to start Christmas shopping early.
*
He thinks he might find something worthwhile in the stall full of leather goods, but it ends in ultimate disappointment.
He recognizes some sort of disconnect here. There are rugged thick leathers for men and/or various creatures of imposing size and stature, and tiny demure ones for the more slight or feminine. There skirts, mini skirts, slit skirts, layered skirts, and even a pair of leather booty shorts that John would give a non-vital organ to see Aeryn in, but nothing really right for her.
There are coats, but Aeryn already has a leather coat and John enjoys the look of it on her far too much to want her to replace it.
"What about this?" Chiana holds up something strappy and slinky.
"Really? Aeryn?" He gives her a doubtful look. "In that?"
"No, stupid!" She snickers at him. "It's for you!"
She holds it up again and John groans, seeing suddenly the expanse of cloth that he'd assumed was the back - and that actually is the front.
"See, it snaps here, and it goes around you-"
"Chiana!" He grabs her hand and lowers it, keeping her from putting it on display and cutting her explanation off midway through. "NO, no, no."
"You're no fun, old man!" She slinks out of his grasp and makes a face. "Come on, this place is boring. Unless you wanna try it on..."
"Chiana!" He groans again and takes off after her.
*
"Think she'd want a pet?" Chiana calls out to John, slowing in front of another storefront. "Look, Crichton! They've got those cute little miggiewits!"
"What?" John backtracks to see what she's looking at. She's already moved inside of the shop and she's peering into a little enclosure.
"They're so cute!" She shrieks and whatever she's staring at trills back at her.
John stands beside her and looks down. It's about a foot high and fuzzy, fur alternating brown and white in patches. It has big pink ears and a twitching pink nose and a blue tongue that darts out every few seconds.
"Hey, it's Gizmo," John says, grinning. He starts to reach down and then stops, thinking better of it. He asks Chiana, "Does it bite?"
"Nuh uh," Chiana says, scritching it on the head. "I mean, not unless you bite it first!"
"Are any of its bodily fluids toxic? Does it sting, infest, infect, or in other way potentially cause harm to my body?"
"No," Chiana says, giving him her best duh expression.
John looks down at it again. It looks back up at him curiously. "What happens if you feed it after midnight?"
"Uh... it's not hungry anymore?" Now she's looking at him like he's weird and stupid. "Crichton, they're domesticated, for kids! Go on, pick him up. He looks like he likes you."
"C'mere, little Mogwai," John says, reaching down for it.
"Miggiewits," Chiana says, correcting him.
"Right, that's what I said." This time John's being obtuse. The way Chiana never fails to laugh encourages him. "Mogwai. Can I call you Gizmo? Yeah, you're a trouble maker, aren't you?"
It's adorable. It has a little rumbling purr that starts up as soon as it's in John's grasp and it scrambles it's little hands and feet to get closer to him, burrowing against his neck.
"They like heat," Chiana says. "No wonder it loves you!"
It's fuzzy, and friendly, and the cutest damn thing John's in months. He falls in love within five microts of holding it and it pains him to think of leaving the shop without this adorable little pet.
Which just means that, without a doubt, Aeryn would hate it.
*
They stop for lunch.
"Tastes like Chinese food," John says around a mouthful of noodles. "Do I wanna know what it's made out of?"
Chiana chews her bite of something orange and springy that John can't pronounce. She looks at him with an orange stained grin and shakes her head. "Nope. You definitely don't."
John's reached a mental state of no longer being phased by that response, having heard it so much by this point. He just shrugs and takes another bite. "Didn't think so."
*
Places that Chiana tries valiantly to convince John that they will find the perfect gift for Aeryn in:
Exotic foods. Less exotic, John thinks, and more smelly. He passes for the sake of his own olfactory sense.
Sex shop. John might not get all the lingo but some things are just universal. He knows a dildo when he sees one.
Wedding gowns. John pauses, just for a moment, and then keeps walking.
Tentacle sex shop. Chiana always tricks him with this one, because apparently John doesn't know a dildo when he sees one.
Candy shop. Aeryn's sweet tooth is all but non-existent. He's convinced it's a hold out from her Peacekeeper days and that she secretly would love chocolate if he ever managed to find some, but so far nothing in the Unchartered Territories has even come close. He leaves the shop with a bag of goodies for himself and two for Chiana, but nothing for Aeryn.
The same shop that they stopped at first. Chiana really likes that glass ornament.
Luxan food vendor. Chiana actually doesn't try to convince John to buy anything for Aeryn in it, but she does linger long enough over a small container of some kind of berry that John slips her a few more credits so she can buy it. She doesn't come out and say it's a present for D'argo... but she doesn't really need to. John tells himself that he'll be happy if at least one of them gets to give someone a gift that earns them a few brownie points.
*
There's a huge grin on John's face when he walks into the store.
"This is it," he announces. "Gotta be here."
"Here?" Chiana sounds dismayed. "Crichton, come on! What about that necklace we saw in that shop an arn ago? That'd look drad on Aeryn, you know it!"
"Right, because Aeryn's just got a whole jewelry case full of pretty rings and necklaces, right?" John makes a face at her. He says dismissively, "You know she'd never wear it. She'd probably laugh and throw it back in my face."
"Not if you gave it to her," Chiana says. There's something sly in her tone that gives John hope he feels he has no right to, so he pushes it out of his mind.
"No, this is the place." He takes a few steps in and breathes in the smell of leather and metal and chakkan oil. It smells like... like Aeryn.
"Help'y?" The burly thing behind the counter growls, albeit in a non-threatening way.
"He's look for a present for our... friend." She gives John a smirking look. "His special friend."
"We'll just look around," John says, guiding her toward the back.
There's a big display of things that John sort of vaguely recognizes but feels he really has no authority on. "What do you know about Peacekeeper weaponry?"
"Enough to know all of this has been salvaged, not, uh, 'acquired' new," Chiana says. She points to one. "Scuffed and it has scratches near the trigger."
John squints. "How can you see... oh, never mind. Okay... well, she doesn't need a new gun anyway, maybe just something to go with her pulse pistol. Hey, man, you got any accessory kits around here? Custom finish for a pulse pistol? Give it some racing stripes, put her own little spin on it..."
He gets blank looks.
Again, not something that really phases him anymore.
"What sort of pulse pistol accessories for you have?" He tries again.
The creature points a lumbering limb toward the far corner of the store. John and Chiana close the distance.
"What about this?" Chiana holds up a red and black case. "Says it comes with polish, cleaning cloths, brushes, and a little case to hold extra chakkan oil cartidges?"
John thinks about it, but passes by the red and black one for a dark green. "Maybe this one."
Chiana seems to find his color choice distasteful, but she shrugs. "Your pick."
"Yep." John grins at her, pleased with his selection. "She'll love it, right?"
"It's boring!" She whines a little... and then relents. "But so is Aeryn, sometimes. She'll love it."
John trades his currency for the case and feels triumphant as he walks out with it.
"We have to go now?" Chiana sounds disappointment, like a kid at the end of recess.
"Nah," John says. He slings his arm around her. "We got a couple other things to get first... not a party without the decorations. And as a special treat for helping me find Aeryn's present... you get to help me pick out the cake."
Rating: PG-13
Written For: vinegar_dog
Written by: dizzydame
Notes: John takes Chiana shopping.
Chiana bounces everywhere. She darts off, to and fro like a kid, disappearing from John's range of vision and then just as quickly coming back. He's used to it by now; she has the attention span of a five year old but she's clever enough to get herself out of most problematic situations that she gets herself into.
Okay, so maybe he does feel a little protective - but today, he's got a mission and it isn't babysitting.
*
The idea of a birthday party appeals to Chiana. Nebari don't celebrate the anniversary of a birth; neither do Luxans, or Hynerians, or Leviathans...
Or Sebaceans.
But the difference in Aeryn and everyone else is that John knows when she was born. He knows because a little file chip told him, and he plans on using that information to the best of his ability regardless of whether or not Aeryn actually wants him to.
Chiana latches onto the idea with an enthusiasm she rarely exhibits - a trip planetside, a chance to shop with currency that isn't hers... John has no doubt she'll pocket a few trinkets along the way but his moral ambiguity has grown along with his comfort at the concept of strolling through a marketplace full of weird, smelly, possibly dangerous aliens.
Right now nothing bothers him because he's a man with a plan, a plan to get Aeryn something that will knock her proverbial socks off. Something that will shock, bedazzle, and wow her speechless... or at least impress her enough that she doesn't knock him cold out the minute she realizes what he's doing.
Maybe he'd better plan on standing a few feet away, just in case.
*
"What about this?" Chiana asks, holding up a brightly colored bauble.
John leans in close to inspect it. Chiana's eyes are wide and the smile on her face lights it up. Inside the delicate globe of glass colors swirl and dance, a glittery substance that John can't name as quite smoke or quite liquid providing endless fascination.
It's the perfect gift, but not for Aeryn.
He shakes his head and she sighs and puts it back down, giving a longing look behind her and a more pointed one back at John.
He just laughs and grabs her arm. "Come on, Pip. We're not shopping for you."
Maybe he'll swing back around to the stall before they leave the planet, though. After all, the Nebari might not celebrate birthdays but there are some Earth traditions that Chiana would love and it wouldn't hurt to start Christmas shopping early.
*
He thinks he might find something worthwhile in the stall full of leather goods, but it ends in ultimate disappointment.
He recognizes some sort of disconnect here. There are rugged thick leathers for men and/or various creatures of imposing size and stature, and tiny demure ones for the more slight or feminine. There skirts, mini skirts, slit skirts, layered skirts, and even a pair of leather booty shorts that John would give a non-vital organ to see Aeryn in, but nothing really right for her.
There are coats, but Aeryn already has a leather coat and John enjoys the look of it on her far too much to want her to replace it.
"What about this?" Chiana holds up something strappy and slinky.
"Really? Aeryn?" He gives her a doubtful look. "In that?"
"No, stupid!" She snickers at him. "It's for you!"
She holds it up again and John groans, seeing suddenly the expanse of cloth that he'd assumed was the back - and that actually is the front.
"See, it snaps here, and it goes around you-"
"Chiana!" He grabs her hand and lowers it, keeping her from putting it on display and cutting her explanation off midway through. "NO, no, no."
"You're no fun, old man!" She slinks out of his grasp and makes a face. "Come on, this place is boring. Unless you wanna try it on..."
"Chiana!" He groans again and takes off after her.
*
"Think she'd want a pet?" Chiana calls out to John, slowing in front of another storefront. "Look, Crichton! They've got those cute little miggiewits!"
"What?" John backtracks to see what she's looking at. She's already moved inside of the shop and she's peering into a little enclosure.
"They're so cute!" She shrieks and whatever she's staring at trills back at her.
John stands beside her and looks down. It's about a foot high and fuzzy, fur alternating brown and white in patches. It has big pink ears and a twitching pink nose and a blue tongue that darts out every few seconds.
"Hey, it's Gizmo," John says, grinning. He starts to reach down and then stops, thinking better of it. He asks Chiana, "Does it bite?"
"Nuh uh," Chiana says, scritching it on the head. "I mean, not unless you bite it first!"
"Are any of its bodily fluids toxic? Does it sting, infest, infect, or in other way potentially cause harm to my body?"
"No," Chiana says, giving him her best duh expression.
John looks down at it again. It looks back up at him curiously. "What happens if you feed it after midnight?"
"Uh... it's not hungry anymore?" Now she's looking at him like he's weird and stupid. "Crichton, they're domesticated, for kids! Go on, pick him up. He looks like he likes you."
"C'mere, little Mogwai," John says, reaching down for it.
"Miggiewits," Chiana says, correcting him.
"Right, that's what I said." This time John's being obtuse. The way Chiana never fails to laugh encourages him. "Mogwai. Can I call you Gizmo? Yeah, you're a trouble maker, aren't you?"
It's adorable. It has a little rumbling purr that starts up as soon as it's in John's grasp and it scrambles it's little hands and feet to get closer to him, burrowing against his neck.
"They like heat," Chiana says. "No wonder it loves you!"
It's fuzzy, and friendly, and the cutest damn thing John's in months. He falls in love within five microts of holding it and it pains him to think of leaving the shop without this adorable little pet.
Which just means that, without a doubt, Aeryn would hate it.
*
They stop for lunch.
"Tastes like Chinese food," John says around a mouthful of noodles. "Do I wanna know what it's made out of?"
Chiana chews her bite of something orange and springy that John can't pronounce. She looks at him with an orange stained grin and shakes her head. "Nope. You definitely don't."
John's reached a mental state of no longer being phased by that response, having heard it so much by this point. He just shrugs and takes another bite. "Didn't think so."
*
Places that Chiana tries valiantly to convince John that they will find the perfect gift for Aeryn in:
Exotic foods. Less exotic, John thinks, and more smelly. He passes for the sake of his own olfactory sense.
Sex shop. John might not get all the lingo but some things are just universal. He knows a dildo when he sees one.
Wedding gowns. John pauses, just for a moment, and then keeps walking.
Tentacle sex shop. Chiana always tricks him with this one, because apparently John doesn't know a dildo when he sees one.
Candy shop. Aeryn's sweet tooth is all but non-existent. He's convinced it's a hold out from her Peacekeeper days and that she secretly would love chocolate if he ever managed to find some, but so far nothing in the Unchartered Territories has even come close. He leaves the shop with a bag of goodies for himself and two for Chiana, but nothing for Aeryn.
The same shop that they stopped at first. Chiana really likes that glass ornament.
Luxan food vendor. Chiana actually doesn't try to convince John to buy anything for Aeryn in it, but she does linger long enough over a small container of some kind of berry that John slips her a few more credits so she can buy it. She doesn't come out and say it's a present for D'argo... but she doesn't really need to. John tells himself that he'll be happy if at least one of them gets to give someone a gift that earns them a few brownie points.
*
There's a huge grin on John's face when he walks into the store.
"This is it," he announces. "Gotta be here."
"Here?" Chiana sounds dismayed. "Crichton, come on! What about that necklace we saw in that shop an arn ago? That'd look drad on Aeryn, you know it!"
"Right, because Aeryn's just got a whole jewelry case full of pretty rings and necklaces, right?" John makes a face at her. He says dismissively, "You know she'd never wear it. She'd probably laugh and throw it back in my face."
"Not if you gave it to her," Chiana says. There's something sly in her tone that gives John hope he feels he has no right to, so he pushes it out of his mind.
"No, this is the place." He takes a few steps in and breathes in the smell of leather and metal and chakkan oil. It smells like... like Aeryn.
"Help'y?" The burly thing behind the counter growls, albeit in a non-threatening way.
"He's look for a present for our... friend." She gives John a smirking look. "His special friend."
"We'll just look around," John says, guiding her toward the back.
There's a big display of things that John sort of vaguely recognizes but feels he really has no authority on. "What do you know about Peacekeeper weaponry?"
"Enough to know all of this has been salvaged, not, uh, 'acquired' new," Chiana says. She points to one. "Scuffed and it has scratches near the trigger."
John squints. "How can you see... oh, never mind. Okay... well, she doesn't need a new gun anyway, maybe just something to go with her pulse pistol. Hey, man, you got any accessory kits around here? Custom finish for a pulse pistol? Give it some racing stripes, put her own little spin on it..."
He gets blank looks.
Again, not something that really phases him anymore.
"What sort of pulse pistol accessories for you have?" He tries again.
The creature points a lumbering limb toward the far corner of the store. John and Chiana close the distance.
"What about this?" Chiana holds up a red and black case. "Says it comes with polish, cleaning cloths, brushes, and a little case to hold extra chakkan oil cartidges?"
John thinks about it, but passes by the red and black one for a dark green. "Maybe this one."
Chiana seems to find his color choice distasteful, but she shrugs. "Your pick."
"Yep." John grins at her, pleased with his selection. "She'll love it, right?"
"It's boring!" She whines a little... and then relents. "But so is Aeryn, sometimes. She'll love it."
John trades his currency for the case and feels triumphant as he walks out with it.
"We have to go now?" Chiana sounds disappointment, like a kid at the end of recess.
"Nah," John says. He slings his arm around her. "We got a couple other things to get first... not a party without the decorations. And as a special treat for helping me find Aeryn's present... you get to help me pick out the cake."