ATTENTION ALL YOU FACTORING HECTOPASCALS
I'm in love.
Okay, um. The battle system is not really my thing, and the music isn't either - I'm not that fond of rap - but oh, the dialogue. The characters. I am weak versus snark.
Neku is emo and hilarious. Shiki seemed to be your generic genki girl, except not. Joshua is a very SPECIAL boy and I am so gay for him. Beat's slang is painful. Rhyme is cuuuute. Minamimoto is the most awesome villain ever in terms of zetta fun. No, seriously. What other villain would recite the first hundred decimals of pi as his death speech?
The branded clothes are a source of major hilarity. Joshua is, apparently, a sensible princess. (With a fucking expensive taste. No thanks, Josh, for sucking up my yen.)
Neku fights with pins, Beat with his skateboard, Shiki with her stuffed toy and Joshua drops vending machines and road signs on monsters via his cellphone camera.
Now for a few completely incoherent thoughts I had while playing and some snippets of dialogue:
Shiki: Anyway, where are my manners? My name’s Shiki Misaki. Call me Shiki.
Neku: *thinking* I call this wack.
Uzuki is love ♥
Neku: Hey! Stalker!
Shiki: I'm not a stalker!
Shiki: Off.
Neku:: What?
Shiki: Your shorts. Take them off!
o-oh my god shiki you're killing me XDXDXD
Joshua: Morning, sunshine.
Neku: Har har. You're killing me, Josh. Oh, wait.
Joshua: I promise you my advice is spot-on. Lucky you, having me as your partner.
Neku: *thinking* I'm going to choke this kid.
OMG OMG OMG DID JOSHUA JUST SAY 'MOSEY'? OH SQ I AM IN LOVE ♥ ♥ ♥
a-and then dilly-dally-shilly-shally *hearts violently*
Neku: Do you know how to play Tin Pin Slammer?
Joshua: Who? Me? Don’t be silly. I don’t have a clue. Good thing I’m not entering, hmm?
Neku: What!?
Joshua: I thought you were going to clear this mission, Neku?
Shooter: Just a sec! I’ll draw it out clear and easy for you! Here! THIS is Tin Pin Slammer!
Neku: ...... *thinking* It hurts to look...
Joshua: My, my. Then there’s quite a bit of depth to it.
Shooter: Right!? The timing right here is super important!
Joshua: This is practically a map to victory, huh, Neku?
Neku: ......
Joshua: Neku? Do you still not get it?
Shooter: What!? You need MORE explanation!?
Minamimoto: What, you’re just going to ignore me? You half-blind hectopascals!
Minamimoto: Damn right! That game was zetta dull! Are you trying to bore me to death? How about a little flair!? Give it some edge! You brain-dead binomials are pathetic!
Joshua: Wow, you sat there watching the entire mission? Do GMs always have that much time on their hands?
Minamimoto: No comments from the peanut gallery. Your opinions are garbage! CRUNCH! I’ll add them to the heap!
Joshua: Hee hee... I figured you weren’t much for criticism. Otherwise, why keep making those senseless junk heaps?
Minamimoto: Heh. Even inch of my work is flawlessly calculated. Look at the perfectly understated silhouette. How can you not see the beauty!? ...Time for a little quiz. What’s the probability of you Players surviving the week?
Joshua: Gee, I wonder.
MINAMIMOTO: MOST HILARIOUS VILLAIN EVER Y/Y?
Minamimoto: Attention, all tasteless tetrahedra! If you want to live, show me the limit of U as I go to infinity! Not that there’s anything any of you can do. You fractals have no future! QED. Class is dismissed!
Neku:*thinking* What language is that guy speaking?
Mr. H: I’ve known Joshua for a while now. He’d swing by when he was bored, and we’d talk. See, he’s a little special...
Neku: “Special”?
Mr. H: Yeah. He sees things.
Neku: Things? Like what? “I see dead people,” kind of sees things?
Mr. H: Pretty much.
Neku:*thinking* Just focus on the game, Neku. Keep those emo urges at bay...
Megumi about Joshua: When he sees a hole, he knows how to fill it.
*snorts. loudly.*
Joshua: Just shut up and walk, dear.
♥
Okay I'll stop now otherwise I'll probably end up quoting the whole game script.