On the fifth day of Sparklemas...

[cleolinda]

... my blogger gave to me: IIIIIIIII'M NOT A FAAAAAAAN.

MSNBC: Why doesn’t ‘Twilight’ have a Team Bella?

And there I am, front and center--described as "Cleolinda Jones, a 31-year-old 'Twilight' fan from Birmingham, Ala," in a turn of phrase that elicited great chagrin on Twitter.

Comments

[glenvorian]

I'm keeping my fingers crossed for the little guy!

[beth_shulman]

1) I'm having the same struggling-with-fandom situation (If you're not a fan, why do you know so much about it?) Gosh. I'm in it for the lulz, okay?

2)Good reviews? This may be an alternate universe. Heh. The trailer still cracks me up, though.

3) MSNBC may have just lost the little credibily they still had. DO YOUR RESEARCH, people. It's in your job description.

Also: Twilight den mother is so awesome and so, so apt.

[cleolinda]

Well, I mean, I talked on the phone with the reporter and made it pretty clear (I thought). I think any confusion there is a matter of space considerations--they couldn't spare an extra ten words to describe conflicted feelings I myself have a hard time articulating. Or they decided not to mince words and call it what it is.

Although, really, we could have solved this problem by simply saying "writer" instead of "Twilight fan."

[beth_shulman]

True. And at least she went straight to the expert :) A+ for effort.

[mdmbrightside]

Although, really, we could have solved this problem by simply saying "writer" instead of "Twilight fan."

Or "commentator." Possibly "informant."

[cleolinda]

AH GOD THAT'S A HORRIBLE WAY TO THINK OF IT

He's accompanied by his own Sarah McLachlan song, isn't he?

This is why I'm not allowed to go to pet stores. Or walk past them. Or think about them.

[litlover12]

Heh. Only in his case it's probably a Muse song.

(And here I am making fun of a sad little homeless cat. Twilight, see what you've done to me? SEE??)

[cleolinda]

Well, I was thinking of those awful commercials--what are they for, the Humane Society? Something--about homeless, abused animals ("Why did they hurt me?" "Am I going to die tomorrow?") that always have Sarah McLachlan songs in the background. Oh my God, they put me in the fetal position, they're terrible.

[litlover12]

"Twilight mocker" would be so much more fitting, I think. Too bad they didn't think of that.

As for poor Edward Cat, I just hope whoever takes him is willing to supply him with plenty of scrapbooking material.

[cleolinda]

They can keep a scrapbook of him! Which is pretty much what I do with my dogs anyway, with all the pictures I post of them.

[r_a_black]

I think, really, there's a new category for Twilight when it comes to fandom. I loathe the series, but I can lol at it, and I talk a whole damn lot about it. I would never, ever call myself a fan though. Anti-fan is commonly used as a term for people like me, but I'm not sure that's satisfying enough.

[beth_shulman]

Yup, same here. And it's so entertaining that something so vapid engenders such analysis. That's half the lulz for me. ("What are you arguing so intensely about? Huh? Twilight?")

[cleolinda]

Well, and I think part of the constant urge to analyze comes from the discrepancy between the... lackingness... of the material and the massive fan response. You can understand pretty easily why people love Harry Potter, and you can be glad that they do. You get to Twilight, and it's got thin characters, a weak prose style, minimal plot, intensely problematic themes, and hardly any world-building; all the interesting things seem to exist offstage or between the lines. What the hell do people like about it? And not just like, but devote significant, passionate chunks of their lives to? I mean, this is something I have written about at length, so I think I know. But that's the thing--we end up sitting around talking about it (and railing at it) endlessly because it's just such a troubling, counter-intuitive conundrum.

[beth_shulman]

I think that's why there are so many fervent haters. Because they simply don't understand why Twilight merits such a dedicated fanbase, for all the reasons you mentioned.