I think I'm perpetuating internal cycles that make things uncomfortable for myself.. And not in a watchdog - positive kind of way. I mean, that may have been how it started, driving me to success. But it's become extreme, if not abusive... and it has gotten to the point where if i let it, it will take over my life and drive me into despair. It's ( Read more... )

feeling uber hyper... i know i never update this thing (sorry about that!) Got a lot going on, working on getting a new job. Keeping high hopes. Say a prayer for me if you do that sort of thing! (and also happen to read this) hehe... sorry i haven't been on in so long... but yea... hmm.... i'm debating whether to pick back up on this journal or ( Read more... )

I haven't felt this down in a while. And I haven't updated in a while, I know... I just feel really terrible right now and I don't know what to do.

yea so what everyone knew would happen did ( Read more... )

Yea, so I'm now 21. Celebration? eh, not so much so far. I turned on a Sunday, on which I HAD to work. Funds are low because I was out of work for a week with a killer ear infection. And today? Today, I take a day off (unscheduled) for... stress reasons. Can't handle it all sometimes. Things have been a bit difficult, though I know they'll ( Read more... )

I've got a funny feeling... like anticipation.. i feel something in the air around me, like something is about to happen and the whole world is about to shift... then i move slightly and the feeling goes away, and becomes a feeling of just moving through the world... nothing special at all happening.. also a funny feeling... then the former feeling ( Read more... )

<3 yourself or someone like you... ( Read more... )

my niece was born today!!! (well, technically yesterday) ~9:40 am, March 28, 2005... Mycha O'Neil B... 6lb, 12 oz, ~16 inches long.. I told my brother in law, damn, that's about as long as a cat... and it is.... I'm going up to see her this weekend. I'm so excited. When I get paid on friday I'm going to buy some blankets and books and stuff.. ( Read more... )

damn target has some sweet ass sales.... didn't feel well today so i called in to work... Tab and I ended up romping about town a bit ( Read more... )

This weekend I'm going to get drunk and write copious amounts of poetry and practice being moody ( Read more... )