i want to say that you snuck up on me, bastille day, but your existence is never far. Mom, i still need you. I want you. I miss you. I love you. Sleep well mama. 7 years youve been gone. Endless wanting. Until next year.

 It's Bastille Day again. 6 years you've been gone. It's still so hard. I'm at work and am crying and it's been years and it doesn't feel any easier.

Minga Beckman Jagiello
We miss you 
11/21/1946-7/14/2002

I miss you Mom. I miss you so much.

The fires came back, seizing the side of Lake Arrowhead that 2003 did not get. There are three house in the neighborhood left standing, ours is one of them.

1/2 decade.

It is Bastille Day again. It is easier this year than in years passed. It is still difficult.

I miss you mom.

I am pregnant and married now. I will be a Mom myself soon.

I still miss you Minga and I wish you were here for all of this. I love you.

July 14, 2002

It appears that I am pregnant. Wow.

We could never forget Bastille Day could we?

4 years

Love is so short, forgetting so long

I miss you mom.

Nov 21, 1946- July 14, 2002

Sweet Minga.

He's gone. I'm living in Vegas. Job is good. Life is okay. How can you wilingly allow yourself to say goodbye. There is only one "x" on my calender. come home Alex, I miss your laugh.

Here's the start of another adventure. I'm moving to vegas. As of Feb I will no longer be a Cali resident. I am dropping Alex off at the boat and with my car packed I am getting out of town. It's been far too long since my last adventure. "I was runnin down the road trying to loosen my load. . ." The song plays everytime I pass over Cali state ( Read more... )

It was a frozen reservoir. I was going 80 and he passed me going 90, the snow burned my face where the helmet didn’t cover. There were no other tracks in sight. I’d like to think it’s because no one had ever been there before, more than likely it was the foot of snow that had fallen in the mid-Idahoan mountains the night before. I followed them up ( Read more... )

And so, like most other things in my life, he too has passed. As we lay last night wrapped in one another's arms, strangely platonically, knowing that we had made a decision to try our lives on our own and become better people before we were together again, I watched him sleep and each breath broke my heart into a million different little pieces ( Read more... )