First Son (2/7)

Jan 08, 2009 19:43


Title: First Son (2/?)
Author: Read more... )

^ fanfiction: first son, * pete/patrick, # fanfiction, * brendon/ryan

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Comments 63

detox_to_retox January 8 2009, 21:59:47 UTC
rdjngsakejbnqeb
;__;
I love this so much.
It makes me smile and gasp and laugh all at the same time.
I salute you.
=]

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cieluna January 10 2009, 14:07:22 UTC
lol at the keyboard spaz :)))
Awww, thank you so much! :')
Your comment made me so happeee :)
Hope you like the chapter I just posted! :D

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tearstreakedink January 8 2009, 23:15:16 UTC
Haha, oh my god I am so in love with the story. It's just so damn adorable and funny. You totally win at life.

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cieluna January 10 2009, 14:06:34 UTC
aww, thank you soo much! :) I hope I won in RL though T__T haha!

Hope you like my new update! ;)

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ne0nlazytights January 9 2009, 02:41:50 UTC
sorry I didn't comment on the first post, I only got around to reading just now. But it's great. Really is. I cannot wait for the rest of it.

oh man you can back with avengence. RIght on, seriously brillllllllllllllllllliant!!!!!

I THINK

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ne0nlazytights January 9 2009, 02:42:07 UTC
...cut myself off... sorry

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cieluna January 10 2009, 14:24:59 UTC
It's alright dear!!! :DDD

Aww, thank you so much for your AWESOME comment!! :DDD You made me smileeee :)

Hope you like my new update :DD

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slash_scion January 9 2009, 19:32:16 UTC
First off, LOVE THE NEW LAYOUT!

Secondly, I really enjoyed this! Guh. I'm really interested to see if you elaborate on Gabe. And I loooved the Way twins in this! ^_^

And how cute is it that Pete's got a crush on Patrick because he saved his life? haha. I can't wait for more.

Oh, and one con-crit point: "“Sir,” it felt awkward to be watching a frown man twice Pete’s size and width address him so formally, “your father has given orders to return you right away.”" I think you mean "grown" instead of "frown?" Sorry, I just figured you might like to fix that.

Guh. I want mooooore. This is such an awesome idea and you freaking WIN at writing these kids!

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cieluna January 10 2009, 03:24:34 UTC
*hides under covers in shame*
Oh my God, that typo is so embarrassing.
Thank you for pointing that out!
:)

Thank you for the awesome comment, I totally love you for knowing the exact things to say to make me want to sniffle and smother you with hugs, haha! :)

Gabe's going to play an important part in the succeeding chapters xD Oh and the Way twins are the best ever. You've got to wait and see them in the fourth chapter~ ;)

p.s. I think the swirls in my background are hypnotizing me, haha~ @_@

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slash_scion January 10 2009, 04:54:41 UTC
No problem. ^_^ I just know that I hate it when I find stupid typos in my story after I post it.

I'm glad you like my comments, because I absolutely love your writing style. :)

Oh Good! I definitely want to see more Gabe. I know exactly what it feels like to have friends "snatched." YAY. And, I forgot to mention this earlier (but it kind redundant for me to say because it seems everyone agrees lol) the lunchroom scene was my fave in this chapter. Although, I did greatly enjoy Patrick's discomfort at Pete's too-hard pressure on his wound. (Don't ask me why; I'm just weird).

Okay, I'm going to shut up now.

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cieluna January 10 2009, 09:01:32 UTC
Yes, we both know the exact feeling of shame and embarrasment, haha~ Ohmigod 'frown' sounds so stupid T__T

Aww, thank you soo much :D

You got it ;D Oh and don't worry, I seriously liked that part too. with the wound. :\ That's why I sorta elaborated it, but I also don't know why. meh. haha~

Oh don't shut up, we get along too much :DD

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(The comment has been removed)

cieluna January 10 2009, 14:01:07 UTC
*does the happy dance with you* :DD
I loved that line too much, haha~ I tend to reserve my best ones as cliffhangers ;)

Hahaha at the strike-throughed (is there such a word?) text :))

I hope you like my fourth chapter!~ I gots a surprise for you guys ;)) Thank you for your AWESOME comment dude!!

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