That Old Feeling - A Susan/Peter Mix
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this was his favorite memory, out of all of them, out of the millions of them that crawled throughout his many long (and some rather short, even though they felt rather long) lives:
her name was susan, susan pevensie, and she had shortly cropped blue-black hair that she curled so that it would blend in with the rest of the girls in the apartment, the ones who smoked at the front steps of the building.
she didn't go out on rainy days, instead, she stayed indoors and made pancakes for lucy. she would shuffle around in her housecoat and large, fluffy blue slippers, her hair ruffled around her face as if it wasn't quite sure what to do with itself. sometimes she would help clean for mum, who worked part-time at a secretarial job; when she bent to pick up lucy's drawing supplies, he caught the sight of the pale roundess of her clavicle, her pale blue nightgown barely brushing the tip of this bone. when she caught him staring, she would frown disapprovingly and desperately.
"don't," she remarked to him, her voice tense, her arms full of oil paints.
he simply adverted his stare off to the side, her shape a small blue blur.
but then, one rainy day, she took a bath and came into the drawing room. she was wearing a grey shift dress and, next to the window, it seemed like her body became the rain-filtered sunlight, as if she was for once, letting go, letting nature just happen for once in this lifetime.
she put his hands on the tip of her waist and she played records and for once she didn't protest when he slid his hand into the crevasses in the small of her back, didn't protest when he placed his mouth to her throat, when he kissed the soft tops of her ears. this was the last time, but he remembers it well, because she said, her voice trembling over the sound of crackling music, "i'm sorry, i'm so very sorry, but peter, i had to have this, one more time, this is all we have. this. all we have..."
she takes up smoking once again after this and when he watches her from the drawing room window, sometimes she will catch his eye before turning away quickly, her eyes sharp and scared, as if to say, "don't."
and he doesn't.
01. That Old Feeling | Eddie Fisher
I saw you last night and got that old feeling
When you came in sight, I got that old feeling
The moment that you danced by, I felt a thrill
And when you caught my eye, my heart stood still
02. We Kiss In A Shadow | Doris Day
We speak in a whisper,
Afraid to be heard;
When people are near,
We speak not a word.
Alone in our secret.
03. Aren't You Kinda Glad We Did? | Dick Haymes
Oh it really wasn't my intention
To disregard convention
It was just an impulse that had to be obeyed
Though it seems convention we've been scorning [...]
Honestly, I thought I wouldn't
Naturally, I thought I couldn't
And probably I shouldn't
04. Sin (It's No Sin) | Eddy Howard
Is it a sin to love you so to hold you close and know you are leaving
Though you take away my heart dear still the beatin' there within
I'll keep loving you forever for it's no sin
05. Guilty | Billie Holiday
Is it a sin, is it a crime
Loving you dear like I do
If it's a crime, then, I'm guilty
Guilty of loving you
06. I Can't Help It (If I'm Still In Love With You) | Dean Martin
A memory from the past came slowly stealing
As I braced your arm and walked so close to you (yeah)
Oh heaven only knows how much I miss you
I cant help it if I'm still in love with you
I cant help it if I'm still in love with you
07. Memories of You | Kate Smith
Here and there - every where
Scenes that we once knew
And they all - just recall
Memories of you
How I wish I could forget those happy yesteryears
08. I Wonder What Became Of Me | Lena Horne
I've had my thrills
They've lit my cigarettes with dollar bills
But I can't be gay
For along the way something went astray
And I can't explain
It's the same champagne
It's a sight to see
But I wonder what became of me
10. Paper Doll | The Mills Brothers
I'm gonna buy a Paper Doll that I can call my own
A doll that other fellows cannot steal
And then the flirty, flirty guys with their flirty, flirty eyes
Will have to flirt with dollies that are real [...]
I just quarrelled with Sue, that's why I'm blue
She's gone away and left me just like all dolls do
09. These Foolish Things Remind Me | Frank Sinatra
A cigarette that bears a lipstick's traces
An airline ticket to romantic places
And still my heart has wings
These foolish things remind me of you [...]
Oh, how the ghost of you clings
These foolish things remind me of you
11. An Affair To Remember | Nat King Cole
Our love affair is a wondrous thing
That we'll rejoice in remembering
Our love was born with our first embrace
And a page was torn out of time and space
full zip (includes covers)
| Comments are made of lovely things
| Let me know if any of the links go down because I will be more than happy to upload my sick, incest themed fanmix. IT'S TRUE.