I'm so accident prone right now, it's scary...

Make that THREE emergency calls in the last four days!

They said that things usually happen in three's, but I'm considering locking myself in a padded room with a clear connection to my mother to feel safe!

...B.S.ing a last-minute fashion show and having it hailed as something superb in the local paper...

...Calling Emergency 911 at work--TWICE!--For two unrelated events ( Read more... )

"Malaria" isn't working!

Perhaps something more of greater substance with infectious puss-spitting hives might do the trick?
I've never worked this hard to be so repulsive!

Rolling my eyes at him this much is giving me headaches!

Audra: "Tell him you have Malaria!"

Yah, if only!

Longtime- No write. Time to catch up ( Read more... )

I have three major exams, and one serious presentation within 24 hours of each other and I am on an intense sugar rush right now, but I need to sleep so that I can wake up at the buttcrack and study some more and my aunt is here with me and she just told me EV-ER-Y-THING and I wasn't expecting it and it's totally caught me off guard and I feel like ( Read more... )

"All men are not slimy warthogs. Some men are silly giraffes, some woebegone puppies, some insecure frogs. But if one is not careful, those slimy warthogs can ruin it for all others ( Read more... )

So, I hadn't written in here for a while just because I thought that things were becoming a little difficult to articulate ( Read more... )

"As Gregor Samsa awoke one morning from uneasy dreams he found himself transformed in his bed into a gigantic insect."

I'm hoping that the bathos was the climax of it all ( Read more... )