feeling tired and lazy today...
have class @ 3:30 but I don't have anything prepared for my last assignment.
kali is meeting me at the school to clean her screen,
so I will probably just coat my screen
and then head home.
I don't feel like starting any work on it until later in the week,
probably thursday and friday during open studio.

last week of ( Read more... )

As a wise man once shouted at me down a crowded corridor,
"never settle!"

things haven't been okay in awhile.
and even if they were okay,
just okay,
whoever said that it was enough?

I don't want things to just be okay.
I don't want to just be okay.
since when was mediocre something I aspired to be?

like José Ortega y Gasset says,

"the division of society ( Read more... )

I know it's wrong to be angry
because everyone else around you is so happy
and things are going great for them

I should just be happy for them
and push down all of my own feelings
pretend everything is going okay

but I'm sorry...
that's just not the way I am.

***

I really want to be happy for myself.
keep reminding myself
of the good things that are coming up
( Read more... )

okay so,

I think I made my decision.

now all I have to do
is actually carry it out.

easier said than done,
or something like that.

I'm listening to sad songs.

I think writing my last entry really got a lot off my chest.

Last night will definitely go down in history...
overall one of those hilarious nights that I hope I never forget.

Got ready here,
Jorma and some of his friends came by,
and then Laura came to meet me here before we headed over to Kali's.
Laura and I got together with Kali, Kyle, Greg and ( Read more... )

This week was a giant black hole for me.

I really want to make things better.
I just need to figure out how.

Starting tonight,
I am going to learn how to let myself let go.
I am wound up so tight
so desperate to be in control
to stay in control
that I end up... not even living my life.

I am so sick of being worried
and feeling anxious
and trying to do ( Read more... )

absolutely exhausted after today.
figurative painting has proven itself to be an energy drain.
plus I was up @ 7:30 today,
which is way before my usual time.

have the day off of class tomorrow,
so my mom is heading downtown to get our passports done.
and then we're going to do some shopping
before I have to head over to the school
to get some ( Read more... )

today is laundry day.
have so much cleaning to do...
things have just been piling up,
and I have been neglecting them.
so before I go home for the weekend,
it's time to get this mess sorted out.

this week went by pretty fast.
still have a class tomorrow morning,
and then I'm off to the subway
to meet my mom at finch.
I am getting my passport done tomorrow,
( Read more... )

i am so restless.
i am having trouble with transitions.
everything i feel is a contradiction.
i hate going to sleep just as much as i hate waking up.

sometimes i hope for an car accident
a plane crash
really anything to break up the typical pattern
of the day.

i am drawn to chaos,
and i have an attraction to disaster.
i guess there will always be a little ( Read more... )

another day of classes... 10 - 11.30, 12.00 - 3.00 ( Read more... )