Comments | chaptal: Saturday morning navel gazing

chaptal

Saturday morning navel gazing

Mar 31, 2007 08:56

Life is full of the unexpected. Isn't that life? Isn't that what I've been told. That's life. Bad things happen that we can and cannot control. That's how life is, I hear all the time. Having the orbit of your planet shifted is a rare occurance. I do not think it happen often. Correct me if I'm wrong. Did I react badly? I certainly reacted. Who ( Read more... )

thinky, upswing, hope

Comments 10

blue_by_you March 31 2007, 15:13:41 UTC

When my orbit has shifted, I've gone nuts. Totally. It has happened 2 or 3 times and twice I went on an alcoholic binge that lasted months and a few times, I went balistic and my behavior was absolutely self-distructive. So yes, you're doing amazingly well. And the fact that you are still thinking about N, that you are still working regularly, that you are still taking care of what needs doing is all a sign of your strength and determination.

chaptal March 31 2007, 15:34:41 UTC

I've fucked up a lot of things Lisa and I have a long way to go with N., but I think things are going to work out with us. The old work nearly took me out, I like the new place much better. Someone has to pay the bills. None of this was planned, or expected, just like life, right?

blue_by_you March 31 2007, 16:10:57 UTC

Yes, just like life. And the thing to remember is that it will get better and that there are good things and good relationships ahead of you that you can't even imagine right now.

altamira16 March 31 2007, 17:53:01 UTC

I think that the hope has just grown in that period you mentioned. The new job really helped a lot.

chaptal March 31 2007, 20:53:07 UTC

the new job ended eight hours of misery everyday. i've never really wanted to go to work until now.

elainegrey March 31 2007, 19:05:09 UTC

Good things happen that we can't control either. Life, growth, and change will happen when given the slimmest chance. It's terribly disruptive to people who want things to stay the same.

I vote for taking on the pain of disruption and change because it also means you can take on the beauty and the joy. As far as mistakes, sometimes you do have to curl up in the fetal-seed state, rest, and let quiet inner alchemy take hold. But the only real mistake is to stay in that curled up state and refuse the next change.

Hope is a great catalyst.

chaptal March 31 2007, 20:54:28 UTC

thanks. i don't know where this is all going to take me but i'm fairly certain i'll be in a better place.

elainegrey March 31 2007, 21:00:45 UTC

A toast to change and better places!

Just listened to The Who's Behind Blue Eyes on the way home. Heard the lyrics rather differently --perhaps just listened for the first time.

prom April 2 2007, 19:52:28 UTC

I've made huge mistakes, but I also stayed and became alive in the process.

me too, and the above works just fine for me.

i like reading hopeful entries. good to see you taking care of YOU.

:-)

chaptal April 2 2007, 21:13:38 UTC

doing the best i can, not always doing the right thing but i am doing something.