eighteen months, it seems both longer and shorter than that somehow. it is a little funny though, i still have that knee-jerk thought of woo! let's celebrate and get smashed.

feeling kinda depressed tonight, its been a rough year. there are far too many people in my family on facebook to talk about it there, the last thing i want is a bunch of people overreacting to some random post there ( Read more... )

things have been in flux lately. there have been several times of the last few years that i have considered deleting this account, its my friends list that keeps from following through ( Read more... )

been awhile, been going thru a bunch of changes the last few months, im not going to rehash it all here but if you are curious you can probably piece it all together from what is written here:
www.52fridays.blogspot.com

its not that ive given up but that im having more and more difficulty seeing any sort of point anymore.

years ago it would have made me want to kill myself, now though, i just want to throw a rock though a stained glassed window or maybe shoot a panda.

i find it rather ironic that one can rush towards their own destruction by doing nothing at all.

id like to begin to say that i am glad that they are.

but there is something gut punching viscerally painful knowing that they are doing better without you in their lives.

we found the ground an that damage was done.

s'funny if i had somebody, i'm pretty sure i would doing better.