Creepy Old Man, part 1
Years ago Merhawk told me about a creepy uncle of hers. I'll refer to him by the pseudonym Sherman.
Uncle Sherman was creepy in a sex offender way. Inappropriate touching of adult women and inappropriate overtures to adolescent girls. When she was a preteen he gave her his phone number and asked her to call him so they could have a private relationship. "But don't tell your parents," he cautioned.
In the terminology of child exploitation this is called grooming. It's part of a standard approach child molesters use to establish a connection, build trust, and isolate the child. Read the DOJ definition of grooming for more information.
Of course, Uncle Sherman's attempt to groom Hawk didn't work. The first thing she did was go and tell her parents. Because of this and a few other instances of inappropriate behavior around women relatives- girls and grown women alike- Sherman was largely dis-invited from family events for many years.
That changed, though, with a death in the family this past week. Sherman was invited back into the house (Hawk's parents' house) to grieve with the rest of the family.
Hawk didn't want to deal with Sherman at the house. She understood why he was invited but wanted nothing to do with him. She didn't want him trying to talk to her, trying to touch her, or even looking at her (with a lecherous grin). She didn't even want to be in the same room as him. She enlisted my help to keep him away.
I was happy to help. But it turned out to be both less and more than I bargained for.
Continue reading: Part 2.
Uncle Sherman was creepy in a sex offender way. Inappropriate touching of adult women and inappropriate overtures to adolescent girls. When she was a preteen he gave her his phone number and asked her to call him so they could have a private relationship. "But don't tell your parents," he cautioned.
In the terminology of child exploitation this is called grooming. It's part of a standard approach child molesters use to establish a connection, build trust, and isolate the child. Read the DOJ definition of grooming for more information.
Of course, Uncle Sherman's attempt to groom Hawk didn't work. The first thing she did was go and tell her parents. Because of this and a few other instances of inappropriate behavior around women relatives- girls and grown women alike- Sherman was largely dis-invited from family events for many years.
That changed, though, with a death in the family this past week. Sherman was invited back into the house (Hawk's parents' house) to grieve with the rest of the family.
Hawk didn't want to deal with Sherman at the house. She understood why he was invited but wanted nothing to do with him. She didn't want him trying to talk to her, trying to touch her, or even looking at her (with a lecherous grin). She didn't even want to be in the same room as him. She enlisted my help to keep him away.
I was happy to help. But it turned out to be both less and more than I bargained for.
Continue reading: Part 2.