it's sorta killing me that ill be sitting in NYC for about ... 5 more minutes. and that'll be it. then i'm outta here.

this can go under the list of "things i try not
to think too much about":

i can see NYC from my train.

well. i'm back online ( Read more... )

hate me all you want.

...i'm still outta here in 9 days.

i spend most hours of the day talking to myself silently, thinking things i shouldn't get carried away with, and depressed that i'm the only one really listening ( Read more... )

damn, i kick ass...

that's why they call me "hot commodity."

please don't do this to me. i'm just trying to get through the day without remembering how awful everything can be, or how much i'm putting out there, how much i'm willing to risk just to find something to hold me steady for a while ( Read more... )

i am terrified and depressed about everything.

g'bye, Weekend.

g'bye, Reality. g'bye Sense of Self-worth. g'bye, Confidence. g'bye, All Semblance of Self.

hello, Humiliation and Endless Sacrifice. welcome, Compromise and Impulses to Acquiesce - who thought it'd be so easy?

hello, Glass in Hand. pull up a seat, Dim Candle Light. hello, Crowds of People and the Inability to Find a Familiar Face. ( Read more... )

its sad when i realize how lonely i get, and what's worse
is reaching for the phone.

knowing everyone i want to call
is miles away from here.

i just felt that much smaller.