(no subject)
FIRST BATCH. You guys know the deal! Apps are still open and will be open until 6 AM EST. ♥
Remember!
- Applicants, respond anonymously.
- If you're going to do the whole "ask me if I voted you out!" thing, please state who you voted out.
- No speculating about the identity of the applicants!
Now VOTE. ... wtf you guys. CLOSED Box'll put up another batch soon. ish.
Character: Dahlia Hawthorne
Series: Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney (Trials and Tribulations)
Character Age: 20 (as of the end of the first case in T&T)
Canon: Phoenix Wright/Gyakuten Saiban/that one gay lawyer game/etc. is the story of one (1) Mr. Phoenix Wright - defense attorney extraordinaire who fights crime with the POWER OF HIS OBJECTIONS. However! There was a time before Mr. Wright was the glamorous, ass-kicking, possibly-homosexual attorney he is today - a time when he went to college, wore pink sweaters, and had the Best Girlfriend Ever; that is, Ms. Dahlia Hawthorne. Dahlia is sweet, innocent, and believes in the Power of Love and Friendship, opting for the perspective that everyone just really, really needs to be friends. She is polite and respectable, and would never lie, cheat, steal, or even so much as eavesdrop, because, really, she was raised better than that. Her friendly optimism and unshakable smile make her a people-magnet, and she is loved and adored by... pretty much everyone.
She is also a convicted murderer.
The fact of the matter is, if a video game about lawyers has a True and Final Boss, Ms. Hawthorne is it. Her saccharine-sweet persona is simply a mask - her true, rarely seen self is cold and calculating, a master of deceit and manipulation. She uses her natural beauty and her aptitude for crocodile tears and fabricated sincerity to sway people's sympathies and earn their trust, thereby making them ideal for getting her what she wants. She claims that everything she has ever done in her life has been for herself and herself only, and that other people are simply tools - as well as utterly expendable. Watch your drinks, boys; this bitch be crazy.
Sample Post:
Before I say anything, I want you to know how grateful I am that you're here, Mr. Zombie. I... I was such a bad girl earlier, and I would have understood completely if you never wanted to speak to me again. You have such a kind face; just one look at you should have told me you were harmless. I must have simply caught you off-guard... but you frightened me so badly, you have to understand that there wasn't anything else I could do! But it's all right now - in fact, I think having all those horrible teeth removed was a wonderful improvement. All you have to do is keep your mouth closed - yes, just like that! Ahh, Mr. Zombie, I'm so glad you were able to find it in what's left of your unbeating heart to forgive me.
Still, though, I'm sure you're aware that your people and mine simply aren't the same. If we really do want to get along with each other, I think we need to come to some sort of understanding. For example, I know that the exchanging of brains is a sign of friendship in your society, and I think that's perfectly understandable. After all, I'm sure brains must be very precious to you, especially since yours must already be half decomposed by now. But I... I think it's such a horrible thing to do, removing someone's brain, especially when they're still using it! The prospect of not having one just absolutely terrifies me. So you see, I was only taking a precaution; maybe now that you have one less arm you'll be less tempted to try and take any brains, don't you think? Besides, it isn't as if you and your friends actually need to eat to survive; though if you enjoy the sensation, I don't think Madame Director would mind at all if you eat some of the grass. In fact, I'm sure she'd love the extra help in keeping everything neat around here.
Oh, but I know you have been trying so hard to be helpful, Mr. Zombie. I-I'm not very used to being in such a hot, muggy place, but you brought me those flowers and cups of water and wonderful things to eat, even in this horrible, draining weather. It was wonderfully sweet of you, but it took you so long that I was almost sure I was going to faint from the heat. By then it was just too late... everything you brought did wonders for me, but weather like this just makes me so weak. In fact, I... I'm still feeling a little dizzy. B-But please don't worry about me, Mr. Zombie, it's going to be all right. You've been so kind so far - I know that you'll do everything in your power to do better next time. You're just so strong... a little decaying flesh and snapped tendons and things will never be able to stop you when you put your mind to it!
Tee hee, that's the spirit. I'm sure you could fix all of this by the end of tomorrow, at the very latest! It would make me so very happy, I can't even begin to tell you - you'll give it a try, won't you?
... Oh, I just knew you'd agree. ♥
Poll Vote!
Character: Vincent Nightlay
Series: Pandora Hearts
Character Age: Appears to be about 18 or 19.
Canon: Oz Vesalius' life kind of sucks. Oh sure, being the son of a noble is great and all...that is, until you get thrown into a deadly Abyss, have a horrifying near-death experience, and come back to find out that, not only have ten years passed without you, but you're also kind of the only person who can save the world from the forces of evil. Oops. Fortunately, he doesn't have to untangle this political intrigue and magical craziness all on his own. He's got some great sidekicks to help him out, including his wai-wai homo-chan manservant, the killer loli rabbit love interest, and their candy-munching one-eyed mentor.
... and then there's Vincent Nightlay. Vincent is a sweet, even-tempered young man who remains calm and zen-like no matter how weird things get. But don't be fooled by his tendency to wear fluffy dresses and fall asleep in amusing places: he's definitely one of the main villains of the manga, and it shows. He's just a little too obsessed with his brother, Gil. And he has this bad habit of stabbing things with scissors when he gets fidgety. Like eyes. And intestines. And other various body parts. :) When not being pleasantly deranged about...well, everything, Vince is also a masterfully intelligent person whose favorite pastime is to play chess and monologue at the same time. And on top of that, he's capable of doing horrible things in a very, very calm manner... and then pretending it was all a joke at the end. Really. ♥
Sample Post:
Ah, Mr. Blaaargh. That was quite a bold move. Though I suppose I was at fault for sleeping with you in the first place.
You'll forgive me though, I hope. I came to the Lady Director's estate in hopes of finding my dear older brother, but the trip exhausted more of my strength than I had expected. As the saying goes: when one is tired, everything begins to look like a bed. Especially kind sirs such as you and your entourage, Mr. Blaaargh. Really, I found your welcome to be quite lovely. And it was equally kind of your friend to donate his internal organs to the cause. I had to snip off a few of the, mmm, discolored bits, but afterward, they made excellent pillows.
After awakening, I had intended to spend the rest of the day continuing my search, but -- I admit, you intrigued me with your proposition. While I have certainly encountered many... ah, living-impaired personages in my time, you are the first one capable of challenging me to such a rousing game of chess. How do you manage it? I would think the gaping hole in your head would be rather detrimental to your mental processes, but if it allows you to keep a sufficiently open mind, I am certainly not one to argue. You have played a bold and aggressive game so far. As for the stakes ... well. I am certainly curious about this "ceiling information" that your feline friend is offering. What is it, exactly? My brother's location is, of course, quite relevant to my interests, but... in addition to that, your friend seems to be implying that you know something about my brother's personal habits that I do not. How quaint. ♥
Is it my move again? Ah, my apologies. I appear to have talked your ears off -- or at least loosened them considerably. Perhaps if you leaned in a little closer, I could remedy that for you. We wouldn't want to leave them hanging. Check. I do hope that you are prepared to surrender that information you and your cat friend promised me. If I were to attain checkmate and you were lying about knowing my brother's whereabouts for some reason ... ahaha, I would be quite distraught! I am something of a delicate flower, after all, and the thought of being lied to could drive a person to extract a more ... mm, extreme forfeit. Like, say, removing your fingers one by one and poking them through your eye sockets, perhaps.
-- is what I would say if I were a horrible person! Ha ha! Isn't it fortunate that I am much kinder than that? No, I shall simply loan you one of my uniforms and ask you to pay my respects to the Lady Director's aqueous pet in person. And afterwards we shall have another pleasant game. Perhaps then you'll be more willing to cut to the chase.
Tell me, Mr. Blaaargh: what are your thoughts on scissors?
Poll Vote!
Character: Shinonome Kon
Series: Amatsuki
Age: 17-18
Canon: For those newly tuning in, Amatsuki is about Rikugou Tokidoki's adventures into the past... or some simulation thereof. In the world of "Edo" there are the humans and then there are the ayakashi, the nonhumans. Everyone on both sides have predetermined fates that are written into this thing called "Heaven's Net". The only one able to defy and rewrite these fates besides the god in charge is a person who is from a different world and thus is not included in "Heaven's Net", Tokidoki! And maybe Kon.
Shinonome Kon is a delinquent from modern Japan who was sent to "Edo" by the Nue (a demon type thing) before Toki was. He spends two years getting acclimated to the time period and as a result he puts his hair up in sexy top-knots and forgoes wearing pants. Er... that is, by the time Toki arrives Kon has plenty of useful knowledge and advice to bestow upon the poor confused boy whom he takes under wing. One gets the impression that he has a lazy and disinterested disposition since he is generally the cool-headed and logical type; you know, one of those people whose normal range of expressions are basically deadpan or a smirk. But actually he's into all kinds of things... Like starting fights and getting kicked out of school for it... Seriously though, despite being a delinquent he is fairly book-smart as well as street smart. He also turns out to be an adept cook and thinks that as long as you've got good food life isn't so bad. Overall, he can be a caring guy but he spends most of the time being a jerk and teasing his friends, often getting kicked in the head because of it.
Sample Post:
What is this. I nod off for a moment and suddenly I wake up a kitchen slave... And what am I supposed to be cooking here-- myself? I guess that's to be expected of the man-eating undead, but suddenly throwing a guy into a cauldron and thinking he'll make himself into stew for you is just retarded. Look, I don't really care about your culinary preferences, why don't you focus on maintaining your own brain functions first. There're some pretty decent ingredients here... and since I'm such a nice guy I'll show you how.
It's all about a properly balanced diet. If I call it 'brain food' it's more appealing, right? Yeah yeah, we both know that I didn't mean that I'm back on the menu, so get the hell off. Don't be an idiot while I'm trying to take you seriously. Now, this is how it goes. I'll broil some salmon for omega-3 and protein, prepare steamed eggs for choline --that's another vitamin-- and it's not a proper Japanese meal unless it's got miso. I'll add tofu and seaweed to the miso soup along with more fish seasoning, and there'll be rice at the end for your source of carbohydrates. I have the feeling you're the type that prefers fruits and nuts, but that's too bad. The kind you're thinking of would scream and run off if you tried to eat them. And my nuts aren't full of carbs either (heh) so you can forget about trying to make a grab at me. The point is, keeping your own brain healthy means you can stop trying to take mine. Eating it isn't gonna do either of us any good.
Anyway, if you have the sense to have things cooked before you eat it then you're not completely braindead. Which means you can at least tell me where the hell I am while we wait for the food to cook. Or you can gesture vaguely at me--? Oh. Huh, nice pamphlet. So this is Camp Fuck You Die... Looks like the shotgun and laptop are mine then. That's a better deal than I got the last time reality switched on me. Hmmm, but what a terrifying place this looks like. Crappy food on Tuesdays, common time anomalies, an ultimate puppeteer called the Director... It's definitely full of weird things everywhere you turn. Almost like Edo, now that I think about it.
Haah... At least this says there are living people around. Too bad, Zombie-chan, looks like we'll be parting ways soon. But for now, the food's finished cooking and we're not gonna waste it. When we're done eating you're taking me to the nearest live settlement since I was kind and generous enough to treat you to dinner. Hey! You in the mood to see how fast I learn to use this shotgun? If you keep trying to tie me up I'll have to blow your head off. I wasn't trying to wine and dine you and you're still not wining and dining on me, got it?
Poll Vote!
Character: Bakura Ryou
Series: Yu-Gi-Oh! (Manga)
Character Age: 16 years old
Canon: Yu-Gi-Oh! is what happens when you combine ancient Egypt, magical artifacts, and a group of teenagers who take playing games way too seriously. Mutou Yugi was a high schooler who just wanted to solve a puzzle and make some friends. Little did he know that his puzzle would turn out to be a piece of ancient Egyptian jewelry with the spirit of an amnesiac, game-loving Pharaoh inside. Together, Yugi and the Pharaoh play children's card games against increasingly crazy opponents with life-or-death stakes, making epic friendships along the way while trying to collect the various other ancient Egyptian artifacts (known as the Millennium Items) to restore the Pharaoh's memories and live happily ever after.
Meet Bakura Ryou, the kid who has hosted so many tenants that he needs to charge rent for use of his body. He can be found at various times being controlled by either the somewhat psychotic spirit that inhabits his Millennium Ring or, for a time, by Malik through use of the Millennium Rod. When in control of his own body, Bakura just wants to play tabletop games with his friends, really. He has an interest in the occult and learning more about the Millennium items. Oftentimes, Bakura is shown cheering on his friends as they play their children's card games. He is an extremely polite and soft-spoken young man, usually seen with a smile on his face. At his core, Bakura is a very kind-hearted and well-meaning person, but he tends to be very clueless about things. Although he has a friendly attitude, he's very reserved and tends to be the most emotionally distanced of the group. Despite the occasional lapses in memory, Bakura continues to smile and act cheerful.
NOTE: This app is just for Bakura Ryou, and not Yami Bakura.
Sample Post:
Hello, everyone! Or I suppose I should be saying, "Greetings, townspeople of Camp Fuckudie"? I don't have a character sheet yet, but it looks like everyone else is already in costume and into the game... I was expecting to be playing a tabletop game, but I suppose the setting around this place is much better suited for LARP. It's very, ah... atmospheric! Usually I GM games myself, so I'm looking forward to seeing someone else's take on things. It's exciting to be one of the players!
I must say, I really like the zombies. The costumes are really well done; they look and smell like they're actually rotting. And everyone's been incredibly good about staying in-character. For example, I tried to ask where to find the GM--excuse me, the Director, I believe she's being called?--but the only response I could get from any of them were rather insistent requests for more brains. Is that a sidequest? I wonder how many experience points I could get for the "Lost Lobes" hunt...
As fascinating as all this is, though, I don't feel like I should really be getting involved without knowing at least a little more about the rules. I appreciate everyone's enthusiasm, but I'm still a little clueless about a few things. I'm curious as to what role the gorillas are supposed to be playing in a zombie horror setting, for one thing. Someone told me it had to do with Rule 34, but he would only laugh when I asked for the rulebook so I could look it up. Now, I know NPCs aren't supposed to give too much away, but it seems that they could stand to be a little more helpful than that. Still, I suppose it wouldn't be a very good game if all the answers were just handed to me.
And really, I like that there's so much to do around here! I'm especially curious about the lake--with the way it's glowing, there's probably something important or plot-related about it. Perhaps the water is supposed to have healing powers, or maybe there will be a magical item of power in it to defeat the final boss. That's the way these things usually work, after all. I think I'd like to get a closer look at it, and see the... giant tentacle monster... Ahahaha, well this is an unexpected turn of events. I wasn't expecting to meet up with a boss so soon.
I hate to say it, but I think I just lost the game!
Poll Vote!
Name: Yami no Bakura
Series: Yu-Gi-Oh!
Age: 3000+ (looks like a teenager)
Canon: Yu-Gi-Oh is the touching story of a high school boy obsessed with games and the dead Pharaoh who lives in his head. When Yuugi solved the secret of the Ancient Egyptian artifact known as the "Millennium Puzzle," he released the spirit that had been trapped inside it. Together, they fight crime! Or at the very least, kick ass at games ranging from dares involving scorpions to highly-popular card games that can actually result in death. Along with his friends, Yuugi finds himself forced to deal with a variety of villains: some want his cards, others his Millennium Puzzle, and some are just plain crazy.
Yami no Bakura is one of those villains. Like the Pharaoh, he's an ancient Egyptian spirit (he was a tomb robber in life) contained inside a Millennium item: the Millennium Ring Yuugi's classmate and friend Bakura Ryou received as a present from his father. In any case, Yami no Bakura is a sadistic and unhinged egomaniac with a penchant for tabletop RPGs. This love of D&D-like games is only helped by the fact that his Millennium Ring actually allows him to put people's souls into objects-- meaning that that the figurines of his NPCs are a little more than just figurines. Oh, and there's also this whole thing about him wanting to revive the Dark God Zorc through one of those games.
To this end, he's prone to over-the-top (and inevitably foiled) evil plans and bouts of maniacal laughter. However, the complicated nature of his plots often result in interesting twists to his character: though he couldn't care less about his host, Bakura Ryou, he's saved the boy's life before due to needing his body. And despite his hatred for the Pharaoh, something in those plans means that Yuugi's continued survival is necessary, too... making him an odd sort of unofficial babysitter for the cast, beating up their enemies so they don't have to.
NOTE: Yami no Bakura is being apped primarily from the manga and his voice reflects this. For more info, please check here!
Sample Post:
Listen up, you shambling pieces of cannon fodder! I've got an announcement to make.
Apparently there are people who say D&D is the game of Satan! You know, that it's going to lead your children astray, make them devil-worshippers and lead them into Hell. Look, that's just silly. Everyone knows that a game isn't real. You'd have to be an idiot to think a game could suck you in like that. And lucky for you ignorant masses, I'm here to show you just how much nice, wholesome fun you can have pretending to be made-up characters having made-up adventures in a made-up world!
First things first: you have to create a character. You wanna be a Paladin, huh? I wouldn't have picked you for the holy type, what with the bits falling off you and all. What religion? Jenova's Witnesses? Church of Zorc of the Latter Day Saints? Disciple of Marcy? Scientology? Don't be stupid, that last one isn't a real religion. Whatever. Let's move on. Once you've got your character sheet, let's pick you out one of these shiny new pewter figurines. Pretty cool, huh? Now close your eyes, and...
Whoops, did I say you couldn't get sucked into a game? Guess what. I lied. And I think it's about time for you to learn the real fun of D&D. Let's see. You enter a... zombie infested swamp. It's dark. You're likely to be eaten by a Purple Gruerilla. Next thing you know, there's a spout of flame and the area around you lights up-- "Holy crap, that serpent's breathing fire!" you might say. Except it's not a serpent. It's a dragon.
You know how there's that joke about, "You don't have to outrun the dragon, you just have to outrun the halfling?" Weeeeeell, I don't think that's strictly true, per se. Because, see, the halfling is too small to really make a filling meal for the dragon. So maybe you'd gain a little time while it was chowing down on Hobbit flambé, assuming you could still bring yourself to run after hearing your poor, departed party member's screams and the crunching of their bones. And after that, the dragon's going to come after you for the main course. Maybe if the dragon botches its roll, you can get away.
But it just rolled a natural 20. So say goodbye, Mr. Paladin. Where's your god now, huh? See, this is why you should've chosen Disciple of Marcy-- not only do you get a +10 defense against rape, you get a bonus water elemental attack. Useful against those pesky fire-breathing dragons. But I guess it's too late now, huh? That's what you get for being, dare I say it? Brainless! Hah! Hahahaha!
MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! HAHAHAHA-- grk-- haha-- sfjklsdf I think I swallowed a fly.
Poll Vote!
Remember!
- Applicants, respond anonymously.
- If you're going to do the whole "ask me if I voted you out!" thing, please state who you voted out.
- No speculating about the identity of the applicants!
Now VOTE. ... wtf you guys. CLOSED Box'll put up another batch soon. ish.
Character: Dahlia Hawthorne
Series: Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney (Trials and Tribulations)
Character Age: 20 (as of the end of the first case in T&T)
Canon: Phoenix Wright/Gyakuten Saiban/that one gay lawyer game/etc. is the story of one (1) Mr. Phoenix Wright - defense attorney extraordinaire who fights crime with the POWER OF HIS OBJECTIONS. However! There was a time before Mr. Wright was the glamorous, ass-kicking, possibly-homosexual attorney he is today - a time when he went to college, wore pink sweaters, and had the Best Girlfriend Ever; that is, Ms. Dahlia Hawthorne. Dahlia is sweet, innocent, and believes in the Power of Love and Friendship, opting for the perspective that everyone just really, really needs to be friends. She is polite and respectable, and would never lie, cheat, steal, or even so much as eavesdrop, because, really, she was raised better than that. Her friendly optimism and unshakable smile make her a people-magnet, and she is loved and adored by... pretty much everyone.
She is also a convicted murderer.
The fact of the matter is, if a video game about lawyers has a True and Final Boss, Ms. Hawthorne is it. Her saccharine-sweet persona is simply a mask - her true, rarely seen self is cold and calculating, a master of deceit and manipulation. She uses her natural beauty and her aptitude for crocodile tears and fabricated sincerity to sway people's sympathies and earn their trust, thereby making them ideal for getting her what she wants. She claims that everything she has ever done in her life has been for herself and herself only, and that other people are simply tools - as well as utterly expendable. Watch your drinks, boys; this bitch be crazy.
Sample Post:
Before I say anything, I want you to know how grateful I am that you're here, Mr. Zombie. I... I was such a bad girl earlier, and I would have understood completely if you never wanted to speak to me again. You have such a kind face; just one look at you should have told me you were harmless. I must have simply caught you off-guard... but you frightened me so badly, you have to understand that there wasn't anything else I could do! But it's all right now - in fact, I think having all those horrible teeth removed was a wonderful improvement. All you have to do is keep your mouth closed - yes, just like that! Ahh, Mr. Zombie, I'm so glad you were able to find it in what's left of your unbeating heart to forgive me.
Still, though, I'm sure you're aware that your people and mine simply aren't the same. If we really do want to get along with each other, I think we need to come to some sort of understanding. For example, I know that the exchanging of brains is a sign of friendship in your society, and I think that's perfectly understandable. After all, I'm sure brains must be very precious to you, especially since yours must already be half decomposed by now. But I... I think it's such a horrible thing to do, removing someone's brain, especially when they're still using it! The prospect of not having one just absolutely terrifies me. So you see, I was only taking a precaution; maybe now that you have one less arm you'll be less tempted to try and take any brains, don't you think? Besides, it isn't as if you and your friends actually need to eat to survive; though if you enjoy the sensation, I don't think Madame Director would mind at all if you eat some of the grass. In fact, I'm sure she'd love the extra help in keeping everything neat around here.
Oh, but I know you have been trying so hard to be helpful, Mr. Zombie. I-I'm not very used to being in such a hot, muggy place, but you brought me those flowers and cups of water and wonderful things to eat, even in this horrible, draining weather. It was wonderfully sweet of you, but it took you so long that I was almost sure I was going to faint from the heat. By then it was just too late... everything you brought did wonders for me, but weather like this just makes me so weak. In fact, I... I'm still feeling a little dizzy. B-But please don't worry about me, Mr. Zombie, it's going to be all right. You've been so kind so far - I know that you'll do everything in your power to do better next time. You're just so strong... a little decaying flesh and snapped tendons and things will never be able to stop you when you put your mind to it!
Tee hee, that's the spirit. I'm sure you could fix all of this by the end of tomorrow, at the very latest! It would make me so very happy, I can't even begin to tell you - you'll give it a try, won't you?
... Oh, I just knew you'd agree. ♥
Poll Vote!
Character: Vincent Nightlay
Series: Pandora Hearts
Character Age: Appears to be about 18 or 19.
Canon: Oz Vesalius' life kind of sucks. Oh sure, being the son of a noble is great and all...that is, until you get thrown into a deadly Abyss, have a horrifying near-death experience, and come back to find out that, not only have ten years passed without you, but you're also kind of the only person who can save the world from the forces of evil. Oops. Fortunately, he doesn't have to untangle this political intrigue and magical craziness all on his own. He's got some great sidekicks to help him out, including his wai-wai homo-chan manservant, the killer loli rabbit love interest, and their candy-munching one-eyed mentor.
... and then there's Vincent Nightlay. Vincent is a sweet, even-tempered young man who remains calm and zen-like no matter how weird things get. But don't be fooled by his tendency to wear fluffy dresses and fall asleep in amusing places: he's definitely one of the main villains of the manga, and it shows. He's just a little too obsessed with his brother, Gil. And he has this bad habit of stabbing things with scissors when he gets fidgety. Like eyes. And intestines. And other various body parts. :) When not being pleasantly deranged about...well, everything, Vince is also a masterfully intelligent person whose favorite pastime is to play chess and monologue at the same time. And on top of that, he's capable of doing horrible things in a very, very calm manner... and then pretending it was all a joke at the end. Really. ♥
Sample Post:
Ah, Mr. Blaaargh. That was quite a bold move. Though I suppose I was at fault for sleeping with you in the first place.
You'll forgive me though, I hope. I came to the Lady Director's estate in hopes of finding my dear older brother, but the trip exhausted more of my strength than I had expected. As the saying goes: when one is tired, everything begins to look like a bed. Especially kind sirs such as you and your entourage, Mr. Blaaargh. Really, I found your welcome to be quite lovely. And it was equally kind of your friend to donate his internal organs to the cause. I had to snip off a few of the, mmm, discolored bits, but afterward, they made excellent pillows.
After awakening, I had intended to spend the rest of the day continuing my search, but -- I admit, you intrigued me with your proposition. While I have certainly encountered many... ah, living-impaired personages in my time, you are the first one capable of challenging me to such a rousing game of chess. How do you manage it? I would think the gaping hole in your head would be rather detrimental to your mental processes, but if it allows you to keep a sufficiently open mind, I am certainly not one to argue. You have played a bold and aggressive game so far. As for the stakes ... well. I am certainly curious about this "ceiling information" that your feline friend is offering. What is it, exactly? My brother's location is, of course, quite relevant to my interests, but... in addition to that, your friend seems to be implying that you know something about my brother's personal habits that I do not. How quaint. ♥
Is it my move again? Ah, my apologies. I appear to have talked your ears off -- or at least loosened them considerably. Perhaps if you leaned in a little closer, I could remedy that for you. We wouldn't want to leave them hanging. Check. I do hope that you are prepared to surrender that information you and your cat friend promised me. If I were to attain checkmate and you were lying about knowing my brother's whereabouts for some reason ... ahaha, I would be quite distraught! I am something of a delicate flower, after all, and the thought of being lied to could drive a person to extract a more ... mm, extreme forfeit. Like, say, removing your fingers one by one and poking them through your eye sockets, perhaps.
-- is what I would say if I were a horrible person! Ha ha! Isn't it fortunate that I am much kinder than that? No, I shall simply loan you one of my uniforms and ask you to pay my respects to the Lady Director's aqueous pet in person. And afterwards we shall have another pleasant game. Perhaps then you'll be more willing to cut to the chase.
Tell me, Mr. Blaaargh: what are your thoughts on scissors?
Poll Vote!
Character: Shinonome Kon
Series: Amatsuki
Age: 17-18
Canon: For those newly tuning in, Amatsuki is about Rikugou Tokidoki's adventures into the past... or some simulation thereof. In the world of "Edo" there are the humans and then there are the ayakashi, the nonhumans. Everyone on both sides have predetermined fates that are written into this thing called "Heaven's Net". The only one able to defy and rewrite these fates besides the god in charge is a person who is from a different world and thus is not included in "Heaven's Net", Tokidoki! And maybe Kon.
Shinonome Kon is a delinquent from modern Japan who was sent to "Edo" by the Nue (a demon type thing) before Toki was. He spends two years getting acclimated to the time period and as a result he puts his hair up in sexy top-knots and forgoes wearing pants. Er... that is, by the time Toki arrives Kon has plenty of useful knowledge and advice to bestow upon the poor confused boy whom he takes under wing. One gets the impression that he has a lazy and disinterested disposition since he is generally the cool-headed and logical type; you know, one of those people whose normal range of expressions are basically deadpan or a smirk. But actually he's into all kinds of things... Like starting fights and getting kicked out of school for it... Seriously though, despite being a delinquent he is fairly book-smart as well as street smart. He also turns out to be an adept cook and thinks that as long as you've got good food life isn't so bad. Overall, he can be a caring guy but he spends most of the time being a jerk and teasing his friends, often getting kicked in the head because of it.
Sample Post:
What is this. I nod off for a moment and suddenly I wake up a kitchen slave... And what am I supposed to be cooking here-- myself? I guess that's to be expected of the man-eating undead, but suddenly throwing a guy into a cauldron and thinking he'll make himself into stew for you is just retarded. Look, I don't really care about your culinary preferences, why don't you focus on maintaining your own brain functions first. There're some pretty decent ingredients here... and since I'm such a nice guy I'll show you how.
It's all about a properly balanced diet. If I call it 'brain food' it's more appealing, right? Yeah yeah, we both know that I didn't mean that I'm back on the menu, so get the hell off. Don't be an idiot while I'm trying to take you seriously. Now, this is how it goes. I'll broil some salmon for omega-3 and protein, prepare steamed eggs for choline --that's another vitamin-- and it's not a proper Japanese meal unless it's got miso. I'll add tofu and seaweed to the miso soup along with more fish seasoning, and there'll be rice at the end for your source of carbohydrates. I have the feeling you're the type that prefers fruits and nuts, but that's too bad. The kind you're thinking of would scream and run off if you tried to eat them. And my nuts aren't full of carbs either (heh) so you can forget about trying to make a grab at me. The point is, keeping your own brain healthy means you can stop trying to take mine. Eating it isn't gonna do either of us any good.
Anyway, if you have the sense to have things cooked before you eat it then you're not completely braindead. Which means you can at least tell me where the hell I am while we wait for the food to cook. Or you can gesture vaguely at me--? Oh. Huh, nice pamphlet. So this is Camp Fuck You Die... Looks like the shotgun and laptop are mine then. That's a better deal than I got the last time reality switched on me. Hmmm, but what a terrifying place this looks like. Crappy food on Tuesdays, common time anomalies, an ultimate puppeteer called the Director... It's definitely full of weird things everywhere you turn. Almost like Edo, now that I think about it.
Haah... At least this says there are living people around. Too bad, Zombie-chan, looks like we'll be parting ways soon. But for now, the food's finished cooking and we're not gonna waste it. When we're done eating you're taking me to the nearest live settlement since I was kind and generous enough to treat you to dinner. Hey! You in the mood to see how fast I learn to use this shotgun? If you keep trying to tie me up I'll have to blow your head off. I wasn't trying to wine and dine you and you're still not wining and dining on me, got it?
Poll Vote!
Character: Bakura Ryou
Series: Yu-Gi-Oh! (Manga)
Character Age: 16 years old
Canon: Yu-Gi-Oh! is what happens when you combine ancient Egypt, magical artifacts, and a group of teenagers who take playing games way too seriously. Mutou Yugi was a high schooler who just wanted to solve a puzzle and make some friends. Little did he know that his puzzle would turn out to be a piece of ancient Egyptian jewelry with the spirit of an amnesiac, game-loving Pharaoh inside. Together, Yugi and the Pharaoh play children's card games against increasingly crazy opponents with life-or-death stakes, making epic friendships along the way while trying to collect the various other ancient Egyptian artifacts (known as the Millennium Items) to restore the Pharaoh's memories and live happily ever after.
Meet Bakura Ryou, the kid who has hosted so many tenants that he needs to charge rent for use of his body. He can be found at various times being controlled by either the somewhat psychotic spirit that inhabits his Millennium Ring or, for a time, by Malik through use of the Millennium Rod. When in control of his own body, Bakura just wants to play tabletop games with his friends, really. He has an interest in the occult and learning more about the Millennium items. Oftentimes, Bakura is shown cheering on his friends as they play their children's card games. He is an extremely polite and soft-spoken young man, usually seen with a smile on his face. At his core, Bakura is a very kind-hearted and well-meaning person, but he tends to be very clueless about things. Although he has a friendly attitude, he's very reserved and tends to be the most emotionally distanced of the group. Despite the occasional lapses in memory, Bakura continues to smile and act cheerful.
NOTE: This app is just for Bakura Ryou, and not Yami Bakura.
Sample Post:
Hello, everyone! Or I suppose I should be saying, "Greetings, townspeople of Camp Fuckudie"? I don't have a character sheet yet, but it looks like everyone else is already in costume and into the game... I was expecting to be playing a tabletop game, but I suppose the setting around this place is much better suited for LARP. It's very, ah... atmospheric! Usually I GM games myself, so I'm looking forward to seeing someone else's take on things. It's exciting to be one of the players!
I must say, I really like the zombies. The costumes are really well done; they look and smell like they're actually rotting. And everyone's been incredibly good about staying in-character. For example, I tried to ask where to find the GM--excuse me, the Director, I believe she's being called?--but the only response I could get from any of them were rather insistent requests for more brains. Is that a sidequest? I wonder how many experience points I could get for the "Lost Lobes" hunt...
As fascinating as all this is, though, I don't feel like I should really be getting involved without knowing at least a little more about the rules. I appreciate everyone's enthusiasm, but I'm still a little clueless about a few things. I'm curious as to what role the gorillas are supposed to be playing in a zombie horror setting, for one thing. Someone told me it had to do with Rule 34, but he would only laugh when I asked for the rulebook so I could look it up. Now, I know NPCs aren't supposed to give too much away, but it seems that they could stand to be a little more helpful than that. Still, I suppose it wouldn't be a very good game if all the answers were just handed to me.
And really, I like that there's so much to do around here! I'm especially curious about the lake--with the way it's glowing, there's probably something important or plot-related about it. Perhaps the water is supposed to have healing powers, or maybe there will be a magical item of power in it to defeat the final boss. That's the way these things usually work, after all. I think I'd like to get a closer look at it, and see the... giant tentacle monster... Ahahaha, well this is an unexpected turn of events. I wasn't expecting to meet up with a boss so soon.
I hate to say it, but I think I just lost the game!
Poll Vote!
Name: Yami no Bakura
Series: Yu-Gi-Oh!
Age: 3000+ (looks like a teenager)
Canon: Yu-Gi-Oh is the touching story of a high school boy obsessed with games and the dead Pharaoh who lives in his head. When Yuugi solved the secret of the Ancient Egyptian artifact known as the "Millennium Puzzle," he released the spirit that had been trapped inside it. Together, they fight crime! Or at the very least, kick ass at games ranging from dares involving scorpions to highly-popular card games that can actually result in death. Along with his friends, Yuugi finds himself forced to deal with a variety of villains: some want his cards, others his Millennium Puzzle, and some are just plain crazy.
Yami no Bakura is one of those villains. Like the Pharaoh, he's an ancient Egyptian spirit (he was a tomb robber in life) contained inside a Millennium item: the Millennium Ring Yuugi's classmate and friend Bakura Ryou received as a present from his father. In any case, Yami no Bakura is a sadistic and unhinged egomaniac with a penchant for tabletop RPGs. This love of D&D-like games is only helped by the fact that his Millennium Ring actually allows him to put people's souls into objects-- meaning that that the figurines of his NPCs are a little more than just figurines. Oh, and there's also this whole thing about him wanting to revive the Dark God Zorc through one of those games.
To this end, he's prone to over-the-top (and inevitably foiled) evil plans and bouts of maniacal laughter. However, the complicated nature of his plots often result in interesting twists to his character: though he couldn't care less about his host, Bakura Ryou, he's saved the boy's life before due to needing his body. And despite his hatred for the Pharaoh, something in those plans means that Yuugi's continued survival is necessary, too... making him an odd sort of unofficial babysitter for the cast, beating up their enemies so they don't have to.
NOTE: Yami no Bakura is being apped primarily from the manga and his voice reflects this. For more info, please check here!
Sample Post:
Listen up, you shambling pieces of cannon fodder! I've got an announcement to make.
Apparently there are people who say D&D is the game of Satan! You know, that it's going to lead your children astray, make them devil-worshippers and lead them into Hell. Look, that's just silly. Everyone knows that a game isn't real. You'd have to be an idiot to think a game could suck you in like that. And lucky for you ignorant masses, I'm here to show you just how much nice, wholesome fun you can have pretending to be made-up characters having made-up adventures in a made-up world!
First things first: you have to create a character. You wanna be a Paladin, huh? I wouldn't have picked you for the holy type, what with the bits falling off you and all. What religion? Jenova's Witnesses? Church of Zorc of the Latter Day Saints? Disciple of Marcy? Scientology? Don't be stupid, that last one isn't a real religion. Whatever. Let's move on. Once you've got your character sheet, let's pick you out one of these shiny new pewter figurines. Pretty cool, huh? Now close your eyes, and...
Whoops, did I say you couldn't get sucked into a game? Guess what. I lied. And I think it's about time for you to learn the real fun of D&D. Let's see. You enter a... zombie infested swamp. It's dark. You're likely to be eaten by a Purple Gruerilla. Next thing you know, there's a spout of flame and the area around you lights up-- "Holy crap, that serpent's breathing fire!" you might say. Except it's not a serpent. It's a dragon.
You know how there's that joke about, "You don't have to outrun the dragon, you just have to outrun the halfling?" Weeeeeell, I don't think that's strictly true, per se. Because, see, the halfling is too small to really make a filling meal for the dragon. So maybe you'd gain a little time while it was chowing down on Hobbit flambé, assuming you could still bring yourself to run after hearing your poor, departed party member's screams and the crunching of their bones. And after that, the dragon's going to come after you for the main course. Maybe if the dragon botches its roll, you can get away.
But it just rolled a natural 20. So say goodbye, Mr. Paladin. Where's your god now, huh? See, this is why you should've chosen Disciple of Marcy-- not only do you get a +10 defense against rape, you get a bonus water elemental attack. Useful against those pesky fire-breathing dragons. But I guess it's too late now, huh? That's what you get for being, dare I say it? Brainless! Hah! Hahahaha!
MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! HAHAHAHA-- grk-- haha-- sfjklsdf I think I swallowed a fly.
Poll Vote!