(no subject)
... I can post the first batch in between post rape. APPS ARE STILL OPEN for another, what, nine-ish hours? Yes. I can post on this account, hush.
eta: WHOOPS, le mod jumped the gun and we got another app for one that got posted. In the interest of fairness after talking with the others, we've pulled that app and will repost both tomorrow to give both a fair shot.
Remember!
- Applicants, respond anonymously.
- If you're going to do the whole "ask me if I voted you out!" thing, please state who you voted out.
- No speculating about the identity of the applicants!
Now VOTE. Closed. o/
Character: Stork
Series: Storm Hawks
Character Age: 16
Canon: In the world of Atmos, isolated mountain tops known as Terras are surrounded by extreme drops and a lot of sky, and protected from the forces of evil - also known as the Best Villain Ever, Master Cyclonis, and her bumbling henchmen - by groups of warriors known collectively as the Sky Knights. One of these groups is the Storm Hawks, once the most legendary and well-loved team in all of Atmos. After a crushing defeat, the Storm Hawks vanished from the skies...until, years later, a group of teenagers got hold of the wreckage of their famous carrier ship the Condor, decided they would be the new and improved Storm Hawks, and took to the skies in search of fame, fortune and justice.
Stork is the pilot of the Condor, and quite possibly the most unlikely member of Aerrow's trusted team of Storm Hawks. He's a brilliant inventor and scientific mastermind, very often the voice of reason for the rest of his team, and also a totally paranoid hypochondriac. If there's danger, Stork's sure everyone is going to die (and will deliver the news with very dramatic...pauses). If there's a incredibly rare and exceedingly deadly disease, Stork knows for certain that he has it. Whenever the team sets out on a mission, Stork's the one who stays in the Condor and mutters dire predictions about their certain doom. And his own, of course.
Sample Post:
If any of you can still hear me, which I very much doubt, I'd just like to point out that I told you this mission was...doomed. This is not a fertile, peaceful land...this is our grave. There is a reason it's known as Terra F-U Die. All we can do now is hope that our deaths will be swift and painless.
...but of course, they won't be. Do you even know what lies in the depths of the swamp? Take a look around you. All the denizens of this place have already been infected with brain-sucking parasitic worms, their life slowly...drained out of them. And still they wander the night, crying out...their hypnotic voices luring in new victims for the worms...don't drink the water. It's where their life cycle begins. Have you ever seen someone who's ingested a brain-sucking parasitic worm larvae? It's not pretty. And that's only the start of the horrors.
The birds are talking to me. It's the first sign of the deadly swamp fever, thinking you hear birds talking to you. Soothing you with their litany. 'I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings great pleasure in the company of the right partner...' And all the time the rashes are creeping unnoticed up your body, your limbs are turning numb...and then they start to itch...you'll die in agony only hours later. Despite the best efforts of pre-eminent scientists...there is no cure. Only death. Gradual, excruciatingly painful death. And always the voices of the birds...in your final deliriums they call 'Nevermore! Nevermore! Nevermore!', and you know...you know that any last faint hope...is gone.
Even if you survive all of that - and very few do - there's the quicksand. Or perhaps I should say...slow, torturous, agonizing death-sand. You're doomed from the very moment you set foot on it. The forces required to extract your body are...immense. No one has ever done it, not even with five ships trying at full blast to pull them out. Perhaps the heat of the engines merely...angered the sand. Oh yes, it's sentient. It feeds on bony tissue. Listen...you can hear it even from here. Homph...gomph...that's the sound it makes when it's hungry. It's always...very hungry. We are its favorite delicacy. Most of the time, all it can catch is frogs.
Did I mention the fateful call of the dreaded swamp frogs?
We're all going to die.
Poll Vote!
Character Stephanie Brown, aka "The Spoiler"
Series: DC Comics
Age: 16
Canon: You might think that the DC universe is a gigantic sausagefest, with True Men combining skintight spandex, homoerotic situations and super powers. Who can convince you otherwise? Stephanie Brown, that's who! Stephanie is a quick witted, sarcastic girl with a streak of cynicism and more than a bit of anger at the home situation that brought her into the caped life. She is one of many girls in the DCU that feel the need to show the world that superheroism isn't just a boys club. Unfortunately she has a rough time of it, seeing as she's up against the notoriously exclusive Batman, who insists on testing her at every turn -- tests which she often fails, feeding an already healthy inferiority complex. Despite her not being a traditional superhero Steph does her best to keep up with the Batfamily, especially Batman's underaged sidekick, Robin. Sure, a lot of the time she doesn't succeed, but we love her for trying and for showing that the most important things for a vigilante are a keen sense of justice and the ability to brick your future love interests in the face.
Sample Post:
I bet Batman's never been taken down by a detached zombie arm. He's got contingency plans. I bet he even has simulations of zombies swarming you en masse, screaming for your blood. And if he gets knocked out and wakes up in a bird cage suspended over a volcano, his simulation would have proper tools. Like a blowtorch. Not just a transmitter and a set of wires. And it's not as if the toucan is any use; he just sits there and laughs. So how come I get the real life deal? As tests go, this one blows. It's not his city -- or even his state ... and how does he even have connections in Louisiana? Oh right, he's Batman. Jerk. Robin probably got to do his in Gotham instead of the other side of the country. How am I even going to get home?
Think, Steph! Think smart. That means less of the pacing in a swinging cage ... ugh, sitting down until the world stops moving. I guess I could wait for a rescue but ... no! Just because I didn't get myself into this for once doesn't mean I can't get myself out. I'm not going to fail this one. Not this time. So what do I have on me? My "Crimefighting on a Budget" kit, my -- hey, they took my transmitter! The slimeballs! They'd better not have done anything else while I was out, or they're going to be meeting my right hook. And you, birdbrain, stop laughing. Great, now I'm talking to the toucan. And I know I've snapped, because it answered back. I have got to get out of here.
Seeing as I don't have any neat gadgets to help me out, looks like I've got to do it old-school: hair pin to the lock, tie my wire there, kick the door out like so -- and the door clipped the toucan on the way out. Hah! Score one for me. I may not be good enough for the Birds of Prey, but I'm still good enough to fly the coop. Sorry, boys, you just got Spoiled. Sayonara, suckers! I am so out of he -- ow! Not again! They must be really keen to keep me here; it's cost that guy an arm and a leg. I must be the only vigilante in America to get cleaned up by two zombie limbs. And that toucan did not just close the cage door on me again. That's not fair, it still had my hairpin in it! I'll never get that back, not from a volcano. Now what? I guess it's time to go to Plan B. ...when I think of plan B. I'm so failing this test right now.
Poll Vote!
Character: Anise Tatlin
Series: Tales of the Abyss
Character Age: 13
Canon: Tales of the Abyss involves the world of Auldrant, it's destined path as foretold by the Score. The heir of the Score is this world's version of the Church, the Order of Lorelai. But really, this game is about Luke Fon Fabre's story of discovery and ass-kicking. Along this journey, he encounters Anise Tatlin, a cute little girl with a cute little dolly. She (and her dolly) are also very capable ass-kickers.
Anise is part of the Order of Lorelai, and takes her current job of Fon Master Guardian very seriously! Almost as seriously as she takes money. Anise loves ♥ money. ♥ She's very much a golddigger, into finding money, scamming money, marrying into money, and making sure she (and her family) don't get scammed. (It happens more than you think.) She doesn't mind scamming her friends too much - after all, anything's worth a try.
Anise's default state is to project the image of a cute girl (complete with hearts!), but get on her bad side, and you'll be subject to a sharp, sarcastic tongue. She doesn't have problems making threats, as she's capable of making good on them, and she's not above name calling in certain situations. Friends are fair game for mockery, though strangers are better, just because it's more fun that way. However, she really does care about her friends and family, and in the end, does what she can to protect them.
Sample Post:
Lady Director ♥ It was very nice of you to invite me to your lovely resort! The spooky theme is really... unique, if I do say so myself! I want to thank you, because the room service was... well, okay, the lake was quite... um.
...
Okay, I don't think I can go on with this any longer than I already have. I know a scam when I see one. Wanna know why? Because I, Anise Tatlin, am the queen of -- scam detecting. I bet you weren't expecting that one. Heh. Stop looking at me like that. I got here expecting seven days, six nights of deluxe accommodations, and walking distance from all amenities! Well. First point - deluxe accommodations. A rock would be more comfortable than the bed I was given when I got here. I'm no princess, but I need my beauty sleep. It takes a lot to keep this face so gorgeous, you know? I heard that, you stupid birds. Boo! I bet you'd make really pretty quills. Think about that, why don't you?
Next, your staff. They leave a lot to be desired. Room service takes too long, and you'd almost think they were going out and killing the meal as I order it. That could be a selling point, but come on! After thirty minutes, it should be free. I'm a customer! To continue! The bellhops are unattractive! Now, I get that they're made up to match the resort's theme, but honestly, you come to a place like this for the scenery. I'd figure you'd leave them at least moderately good-looking. I can appreciate a cute guy ♥, even if they're not my type, or even in my league. Now, these guys aren't in my league, because they really ought to be, oh, 20,000 leagues under, if you get my drift. I think even 6 feet under is fine too. On a more practical note, they have no fingers, and it makes it hard for them to actually carry my bags. On the good side, there's less of a chance they'll steal my stuff. They've already got their five finger discount.
Third - amenities go where? I shouldn't have to say anything else, but I'll elaborate for you. One, too many tacky souvenirs at the gift shop. Two, your hot springs need better maintenance. It's either walrus shaped mold, or a walrus infestation. You might want to get that checked out by a medical professional. Three, the Talking Bird exhibit is possibly the worst thing ever. I mean, they're cute, but that's all they've got going for them. If I hear one word out of you guys, why, I don't even know where I'd start. That's a promise~ ♪
I could go on, but I'll leave it on this note - the lake. I paid for a lake-view, and this, my friends, is definitely not a lake-view. The window is facing the wrong direction! Part of the attraction of this place was the Magical Glowing Lake! Yeah, yeah, it illuminates the entire camp at night, but not being able to see it from my window is just a rip off. I demand fair compensation! Also, this room was supposed to be non-smoking - the fire in the bathtub means you're lying. The reception staff is full of lying bastards.
This is more like a five-skull resort if I ever saw one. Why, I'd never come back here, or even tell my friends anything good about it... Oh, another week? for free? Anise wins again! ♥
Poll Vote!
[lol mod jumping the gun. WHO WOULD HAVE THOUGHT WE'D GET A DUP, apologies to both appers for this character. The app is pulled and will be reposted tomorrow. ♥]
Character Name: Nanami Kiryuu
Canon: Revolutionary Girl Utena
Age: 13/14
Canon: Revolutionary Girl Utena is a shoujo series in which a girl wants to become a prince, everything--from baseball to cowbells--has some sort of deep symbolic meaning, half-naked photoshoots on cars are the norm, the school's chairman is evil and possibly banging your best friend, and surfing elephants are a very real hazard in India. And that's just the first 15 episodes!
Nanami is the little sister of Student Council President Touga, and it's safe to say she has one...extreme Big Brother complex. She adores and is 100% dedicated to him, and possessive to the point where it's a tad unhealthy (like you don't watch your brother shower for nostalgia's sake). A spoiled brat, and more than a little on the snobby side, Nanami has a tendency to go off on wild tangents, blow things out of proportion, and make over-dramatic accusations. However, Nanami's actually very clever, stubborn, and almost as manipulative as her brother. While she's mostly used for comedic relief in the series, she's one of the first to actually analyze her own behavior and eventually even questions the love of her brother. This doesn't change the fact that she falls victim to every cracked out plot device from laying laser chicken eggs to runaway boxing Kangaroos.
Sample Post:
How disgusting! I suggested we go to Paris, Madrid, or even Transylvania for our class trip. What? I hear the castles are very exotic there! But no! Some genius felt the backward lands of America would be a much more educational experience. Hmph, democracy. Just because a vote is unanimous doesn't mean it's a good idea! Exactly what is so culturally endearing about a swamp is lost on me. The only impression it's made so far is the filthy print one of the show gorillas left on my uniform. I expect my dry-cleaning to be fully reimbursed.
The service here is utterly detestable as well. I asked one of the walrus costumed gentlemen for a towel for the onsen and he honked at me. The nerve! Not only did I not receive my towel but since when do walruses honk? How very out of character. He surely won't be getting a tip. Also the wildlife isn't photogenic at all! Honestly, how am I supposed to take pictures of an endangered squid when it only flails its tentacles around? And I've seen more exciting cows back on Papa's farm. Everyone knows steel cowbells are so last season. And coating the entire cow? Now that's just tacky.
Aaah, what a boring trip this will be! What am I supposed to learn in such a repulsive, dirty place? There are no art museums, no tourist traps, no nothing! The only saving grace is the Mariachi Lizard Band singing.
--singing! Why, they're singing Frère Jacques! And what a beautiful version it is! The "Mmmm whatcha say" is quite a unique touch! Aaah, just replace Jacques with Touga and it sounds almost romantic. I didn't realize Louisianian musicians could improvise so well! And an adorable little crab just informed me that the camp is famous for exploring all sorts of relationships. I must learn more!
Ohohoho! This trip may not be such a waste of time after all. Big Brother will be so thrilled to see how cultured his little Nanami has become once I return! I'll be a true Southern Belle! Wait for me, dear Brother, I'm bringing home
Popeyes!
Poll Vote!
Character: Touga Kiryuu
Series: Revolutionary Girl Utena
Age: 17
Canon: Once upon a time there was a princess, and she was very sad, for her mother and father had died. Before the princess appeared a prince on a white horse. He dried her tears and taught the values of nobility and gender confusion. Eventually that princess went to Ohtori Academy, a school where magical rotating castles float upside-down over ridiculously tall duel-arena-topped corkscrew staircases, the chairman lures nearly every member of the cast into his unmarked red sports car, and everyone has fabulous hair.
And none could possess a more fabulous mane of shimmering crimson locks than Touga Kiryuu, president of the Student Council. A notorious playboy, Touga is surrounded by throngs of fangirls wherever he goes. He thinks of himself as a chivalrous ally to women, but in truth he's ruthlessly manipulative and often quite sadistic. Listen, can you hear it? If your soul has truly not given up, you should be able to hear the sound of his shirt flying open.
Sample Post:
Darling, we need to have a talk.
But first, I want to tell you that you look stunning tonight. It's true - when planted with the seeds of love, even a wilted rose can still blossom. Anyone could see that you're glowing in a way that goes even beyond how long we've been sitting near the lake. Only the purest of love could bring that light into your eyes. Eye. Let me get that for you.
And certainly, we've had some good times. That night you threw yourself into my window to get my attention. Holding your hand while sewing it back onto your wrist. The way you would lean over and gently nibble on the back of my head. More than anything, I'll never forget the day I knew that you'd given me your heart, because I'd found it in my locker. I'm not exaggerating when I say that I've never dated a girl like you before. This relationship will always be special to me.
Still, I've been contemplating it for awhile now, and I'm starting to think that this isn't meant to be. It's not you. We simply live in different worlds. God made the living and the dead separate for a reason. Couples like us don't end up in bliss, they end up on daytime talk shows. Even if we're together, we'll never be able to get married or share health insurance, and any children we might have would be unholy abominations against the laws of man and nature. Perhaps we'll rekindle our flame on the day of Judgment, but for now, it is the living women of this camp to whom I must dedicate my body and soul.
There there, don't cry. I know this is hard for you, but there are plenty of other eligible bachelors out there, ones who will give you all the love and respect and brains you deserve. Here, let me dry your eyes. Eye. No no, I've got it. I can only hope that we will still be friends.
...what do you mean, you're suing for custody of my brain?
Poll Vote!
eta: WHOOPS, le mod jumped the gun and we got another app for one that got posted. In the interest of fairness after talking with the others, we've pulled that app and will repost both tomorrow to give both a fair shot.
Remember!
- Applicants, respond anonymously.
- If you're going to do the whole "ask me if I voted you out!" thing, please state who you voted out.
- No speculating about the identity of the applicants!
Now VOTE. Closed. o/
Character: Stork
Series: Storm Hawks
Character Age: 16
Canon: In the world of Atmos, isolated mountain tops known as Terras are surrounded by extreme drops and a lot of sky, and protected from the forces of evil - also known as the Best Villain Ever, Master Cyclonis, and her bumbling henchmen - by groups of warriors known collectively as the Sky Knights. One of these groups is the Storm Hawks, once the most legendary and well-loved team in all of Atmos. After a crushing defeat, the Storm Hawks vanished from the skies...until, years later, a group of teenagers got hold of the wreckage of their famous carrier ship the Condor, decided they would be the new and improved Storm Hawks, and took to the skies in search of fame, fortune and justice.
Stork is the pilot of the Condor, and quite possibly the most unlikely member of Aerrow's trusted team of Storm Hawks. He's a brilliant inventor and scientific mastermind, very often the voice of reason for the rest of his team, and also a totally paranoid hypochondriac. If there's danger, Stork's sure everyone is going to die (and will deliver the news with very dramatic...pauses). If there's a incredibly rare and exceedingly deadly disease, Stork knows for certain that he has it. Whenever the team sets out on a mission, Stork's the one who stays in the Condor and mutters dire predictions about their certain doom. And his own, of course.
Sample Post:
If any of you can still hear me, which I very much doubt, I'd just like to point out that I told you this mission was...doomed. This is not a fertile, peaceful land...this is our grave. There is a reason it's known as Terra F-U Die. All we can do now is hope that our deaths will be swift and painless.
...but of course, they won't be. Do you even know what lies in the depths of the swamp? Take a look around you. All the denizens of this place have already been infected with brain-sucking parasitic worms, their life slowly...drained out of them. And still they wander the night, crying out...their hypnotic voices luring in new victims for the worms...don't drink the water. It's where their life cycle begins. Have you ever seen someone who's ingested a brain-sucking parasitic worm larvae? It's not pretty. And that's only the start of the horrors.
The birds are talking to me. It's the first sign of the deadly swamp fever, thinking you hear birds talking to you. Soothing you with their litany. 'I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings great pleasure in the company of the right partner...' And all the time the rashes are creeping unnoticed up your body, your limbs are turning numb...and then they start to itch...you'll die in agony only hours later. Despite the best efforts of pre-eminent scientists...there is no cure. Only death. Gradual, excruciatingly painful death. And always the voices of the birds...in your final deliriums they call 'Nevermore! Nevermore! Nevermore!', and you know...you know that any last faint hope...is gone.
Even if you survive all of that - and very few do - there's the quicksand. Or perhaps I should say...slow, torturous, agonizing death-sand. You're doomed from the very moment you set foot on it. The forces required to extract your body are...immense. No one has ever done it, not even with five ships trying at full blast to pull them out. Perhaps the heat of the engines merely...angered the sand. Oh yes, it's sentient. It feeds on bony tissue. Listen...you can hear it even from here. Homph...gomph...that's the sound it makes when it's hungry. It's always...very hungry. We are its favorite delicacy. Most of the time, all it can catch is frogs.
Did I mention the fateful call of the dreaded swamp frogs?
We're all going to die.
Poll Vote!
Character Stephanie Brown, aka "The Spoiler"
Series: DC Comics
Age: 16
Canon: You might think that the DC universe is a gigantic sausagefest, with True Men combining skintight spandex, homoerotic situations and super powers. Who can convince you otherwise? Stephanie Brown, that's who! Stephanie is a quick witted, sarcastic girl with a streak of cynicism and more than a bit of anger at the home situation that brought her into the caped life. She is one of many girls in the DCU that feel the need to show the world that superheroism isn't just a boys club. Unfortunately she has a rough time of it, seeing as she's up against the notoriously exclusive Batman, who insists on testing her at every turn -- tests which she often fails, feeding an already healthy inferiority complex. Despite her not being a traditional superhero Steph does her best to keep up with the Batfamily, especially Batman's underaged sidekick, Robin. Sure, a lot of the time she doesn't succeed, but we love her for trying and for showing that the most important things for a vigilante are a keen sense of justice and the ability to brick your future love interests in the face.
Sample Post:
I bet Batman's never been taken down by a detached zombie arm. He's got contingency plans. I bet he even has simulations of zombies swarming you en masse, screaming for your blood. And if he gets knocked out and wakes up in a bird cage suspended over a volcano, his simulation would have proper tools. Like a blowtorch. Not just a transmitter and a set of wires. And it's not as if the toucan is any use; he just sits there and laughs. So how come I get the real life deal? As tests go, this one blows. It's not his city -- or even his state ... and how does he even have connections in Louisiana? Oh right, he's Batman. Jerk. Robin probably got to do his in Gotham instead of the other side of the country. How am I even going to get home?
Think, Steph! Think smart. That means less of the pacing in a swinging cage ... ugh, sitting down until the world stops moving. I guess I could wait for a rescue but ... no! Just because I didn't get myself into this for once doesn't mean I can't get myself out. I'm not going to fail this one. Not this time. So what do I have on me? My "Crimefighting on a Budget" kit, my -- hey, they took my transmitter! The slimeballs! They'd better not have done anything else while I was out, or they're going to be meeting my right hook. And you, birdbrain, stop laughing. Great, now I'm talking to the toucan. And I know I've snapped, because it answered back. I have got to get out of here.
Seeing as I don't have any neat gadgets to help me out, looks like I've got to do it old-school: hair pin to the lock, tie my wire there, kick the door out like so -- and the door clipped the toucan on the way out. Hah! Score one for me. I may not be good enough for the Birds of Prey, but I'm still good enough to fly the coop. Sorry, boys, you just got Spoiled. Sayonara, suckers! I am so out of he -- ow! Not again! They must be really keen to keep me here; it's cost that guy an arm and a leg. I must be the only vigilante in America to get cleaned up by two zombie limbs. And that toucan did not just close the cage door on me again. That's not fair, it still had my hairpin in it! I'll never get that back, not from a volcano. Now what? I guess it's time to go to Plan B. ...when I think of plan B. I'm so failing this test right now.
Poll Vote!
Character: Anise Tatlin
Series: Tales of the Abyss
Character Age: 13
Canon: Tales of the Abyss involves the world of Auldrant, it's destined path as foretold by the Score. The heir of the Score is this world's version of the Church, the Order of Lorelai. But really, this game is about Luke Fon Fabre's story of discovery and ass-kicking. Along this journey, he encounters Anise Tatlin, a cute little girl with a cute little dolly. She (and her dolly) are also very capable ass-kickers.
Anise is part of the Order of Lorelai, and takes her current job of Fon Master Guardian very seriously! Almost as seriously as she takes money. Anise loves ♥ money. ♥ She's very much a golddigger, into finding money, scamming money, marrying into money, and making sure she (and her family) don't get scammed. (It happens more than you think.) She doesn't mind scamming her friends too much - after all, anything's worth a try.
Anise's default state is to project the image of a cute girl (complete with hearts!), but get on her bad side, and you'll be subject to a sharp, sarcastic tongue. She doesn't have problems making threats, as she's capable of making good on them, and she's not above name calling in certain situations. Friends are fair game for mockery, though strangers are better, just because it's more fun that way. However, she really does care about her friends and family, and in the end, does what she can to protect them.
Sample Post:
Lady Director ♥ It was very nice of you to invite me to your lovely resort! The spooky theme is really... unique, if I do say so myself! I want to thank you, because the room service was... well, okay, the lake was quite... um.
...
Okay, I don't think I can go on with this any longer than I already have. I know a scam when I see one. Wanna know why? Because I, Anise Tatlin, am the queen of -- scam detecting. I bet you weren't expecting that one. Heh. Stop looking at me like that. I got here expecting seven days, six nights of deluxe accommodations, and walking distance from all amenities! Well. First point - deluxe accommodations. A rock would be more comfortable than the bed I was given when I got here. I'm no princess, but I need my beauty sleep. It takes a lot to keep this face so gorgeous, you know? I heard that, you stupid birds. Boo! I bet you'd make really pretty quills. Think about that, why don't you?
Next, your staff. They leave a lot to be desired. Room service takes too long, and you'd almost think they were going out and killing the meal as I order it. That could be a selling point, but come on! After thirty minutes, it should be free. I'm a customer! To continue! The bellhops are unattractive! Now, I get that they're made up to match the resort's theme, but honestly, you come to a place like this for the scenery. I'd figure you'd leave them at least moderately good-looking. I can appreciate a cute guy ♥, even if they're not my type, or even in my league. Now, these guys aren't in my league, because they really ought to be, oh, 20,000 leagues under, if you get my drift. I think even 6 feet under is fine too. On a more practical note, they have no fingers, and it makes it hard for them to actually carry my bags. On the good side, there's less of a chance they'll steal my stuff. They've already got their five finger discount.
Third - amenities go where? I shouldn't have to say anything else, but I'll elaborate for you. One, too many tacky souvenirs at the gift shop. Two, your hot springs need better maintenance. It's either walrus shaped mold, or a walrus infestation. You might want to get that checked out by a medical professional. Three, the Talking Bird exhibit is possibly the worst thing ever. I mean, they're cute, but that's all they've got going for them. If I hear one word out of you guys, why, I don't even know where I'd start. That's a promise~ ♪
I could go on, but I'll leave it on this note - the lake. I paid for a lake-view, and this, my friends, is definitely not a lake-view. The window is facing the wrong direction! Part of the attraction of this place was the Magical Glowing Lake! Yeah, yeah, it illuminates the entire camp at night, but not being able to see it from my window is just a rip off. I demand fair compensation! Also, this room was supposed to be non-smoking - the fire in the bathtub means you're lying. The reception staff is full of lying bastards.
This is more like a five-skull resort if I ever saw one. Why, I'd never come back here, or even tell my friends anything good about it... Oh, another week? for free? Anise wins again! ♥
Poll Vote!
[lol mod jumping the gun. WHO WOULD HAVE THOUGHT WE'D GET A DUP, apologies to both appers for this character. The app is pulled and will be reposted tomorrow. ♥]
Character Name: Nanami Kiryuu
Canon: Revolutionary Girl Utena
Age: 13/14
Canon: Revolutionary Girl Utena is a shoujo series in which a girl wants to become a prince, everything--from baseball to cowbells--has some sort of deep symbolic meaning, half-naked photoshoots on cars are the norm, the school's chairman is evil and possibly banging your best friend, and surfing elephants are a very real hazard in India. And that's just the first 15 episodes!
Nanami is the little sister of Student Council President Touga, and it's safe to say she has one...extreme Big Brother complex. She adores and is 100% dedicated to him, and possessive to the point where it's a tad unhealthy (like you don't watch your brother shower for nostalgia's sake). A spoiled brat, and more than a little on the snobby side, Nanami has a tendency to go off on wild tangents, blow things out of proportion, and make over-dramatic accusations. However, Nanami's actually very clever, stubborn, and almost as manipulative as her brother. While she's mostly used for comedic relief in the series, she's one of the first to actually analyze her own behavior and eventually even questions the love of her brother. This doesn't change the fact that she falls victim to every cracked out plot device from laying laser chicken eggs to runaway boxing Kangaroos.
Sample Post:
How disgusting! I suggested we go to Paris, Madrid, or even Transylvania for our class trip. What? I hear the castles are very exotic there! But no! Some genius felt the backward lands of America would be a much more educational experience. Hmph, democracy. Just because a vote is unanimous doesn't mean it's a good idea! Exactly what is so culturally endearing about a swamp is lost on me. The only impression it's made so far is the filthy print one of the show gorillas left on my uniform. I expect my dry-cleaning to be fully reimbursed.
The service here is utterly detestable as well. I asked one of the walrus costumed gentlemen for a towel for the onsen and he honked at me. The nerve! Not only did I not receive my towel but since when do walruses honk? How very out of character. He surely won't be getting a tip. Also the wildlife isn't photogenic at all! Honestly, how am I supposed to take pictures of an endangered squid when it only flails its tentacles around? And I've seen more exciting cows back on Papa's farm. Everyone knows steel cowbells are so last season. And coating the entire cow? Now that's just tacky.
Aaah, what a boring trip this will be! What am I supposed to learn in such a repulsive, dirty place? There are no art museums, no tourist traps, no nothing! The only saving grace is the Mariachi Lizard Band singing.
--singing! Why, they're singing Frère Jacques! And what a beautiful version it is! The "Mmmm whatcha say" is quite a unique touch! Aaah, just replace Jacques with Touga and it sounds almost romantic. I didn't realize Louisianian musicians could improvise so well! And an adorable little crab just informed me that the camp is famous for exploring all sorts of relationships. I must learn more!
Ohohoho! This trip may not be such a waste of time after all. Big Brother will be so thrilled to see how cultured his little Nanami has become once I return! I'll be a true Southern Belle! Wait for me, dear Brother, I'm bringing home
Popeyes!
Poll Vote!
Character: Touga Kiryuu
Series: Revolutionary Girl Utena
Age: 17
Canon: Once upon a time there was a princess, and she was very sad, for her mother and father had died. Before the princess appeared a prince on a white horse. He dried her tears and taught the values of nobility and gender confusion. Eventually that princess went to Ohtori Academy, a school where magical rotating castles float upside-down over ridiculously tall duel-arena-topped corkscrew staircases, the chairman lures nearly every member of the cast into his unmarked red sports car, and everyone has fabulous hair.
And none could possess a more fabulous mane of shimmering crimson locks than Touga Kiryuu, president of the Student Council. A notorious playboy, Touga is surrounded by throngs of fangirls wherever he goes. He thinks of himself as a chivalrous ally to women, but in truth he's ruthlessly manipulative and often quite sadistic. Listen, can you hear it? If your soul has truly not given up, you should be able to hear the sound of his shirt flying open.
Sample Post:
Darling, we need to have a talk.
But first, I want to tell you that you look stunning tonight. It's true - when planted with the seeds of love, even a wilted rose can still blossom. Anyone could see that you're glowing in a way that goes even beyond how long we've been sitting near the lake. Only the purest of love could bring that light into your eyes. Eye. Let me get that for you.
And certainly, we've had some good times. That night you threw yourself into my window to get my attention. Holding your hand while sewing it back onto your wrist. The way you would lean over and gently nibble on the back of my head. More than anything, I'll never forget the day I knew that you'd given me your heart, because I'd found it in my locker. I'm not exaggerating when I say that I've never dated a girl like you before. This relationship will always be special to me.
Still, I've been contemplating it for awhile now, and I'm starting to think that this isn't meant to be. It's not you. We simply live in different worlds. God made the living and the dead separate for a reason. Couples like us don't end up in bliss, they end up on daytime talk shows. Even if we're together, we'll never be able to get married or share health insurance, and any children we might have would be unholy abominations against the laws of man and nature. Perhaps we'll rekindle our flame on the day of Judgment, but for now, it is the living women of this camp to whom I must dedicate my body and soul.
There there, don't cry. I know this is hard for you, but there are plenty of other eligible bachelors out there, ones who will give you all the love and respect and brains you deserve. Here, let me dry your eyes. Eye. No no, I've got it. I can only hope that we will still be friends.
...what do you mean, you're suing for custody of my brain?
Poll Vote!