(no subject)
It goes on and on and on and on~
Remember!
- Applicants, respond anonymously.
- If you're going to do the whole "ask me if I voted you out!" thing, please state who you voted out.
- No speculating about the identity of the applicants!
Now VOTE. Closed!
Character Name: Fou-Lu
Series: Breath of Fire IV: The Unfading Ones
Age: Immortal; appears to be in his mid-twenties.
Job: Positivity Advisor
Canon: Breath of Fire IV takes place in a world guided by the actions of the immortal, godlike dragons known as Endless, who may sometimes take on human form. It begins when a boy named Ryu awakens without memories, knowing only that he must find the stranger who is his 'other half.' While searching, he gets embroiled in the treacherous conflict between two major powers, the Alliance and the mighty Fou Empire. Eventually, Ryu learns who his other half is: the First Emperor Fou-Lou, an Endless. Split into two when he was summoned six hundred years prior, Fou-Lou created the Empire according to the people's wishes, but then fell into a long sleep to recover his power and wait for Ryu to be born.
An unwilling antagonist, Fou-Lu is awakened then promptly pursued by Empire agents, who don't want him interfering in the brewing war. As a result, he spends much of his time getting shot out of the sky and then bandaged up by various good Samaritans. He may come off as powerful, haughty, bitter and reserved, but his attitude stems largely from his being unsure of how mortals think and feel. Indeed, it's implied that given a choice, he would much rather live a quiet, peaceful country life as a mortal himself. This turns out to be an impossible dream: the Empire hurts people he becomes involved with, gradually driving him into a kind of madness, and a need to stop his creation's depredations once and for all.
Note: His badly-constructed Shakespearean English is, unfortunately, canon.
Sample Post:
Ah. 'Twould seem this was a farce. 'Tis low indeed to masquerade as a despairing lady, and raise a barrier over our head when we come to see if we canst comfort thee in thy distress. Aye, we wouldst apologize for mistaking thee as a woman, undead one, but 'tis difficult when thou dost titter unrepentantly over thy 'booby trap.'
Very well, then. Thy name is Jack, and thy dread mistress Sayre dost wish us to counsel thee...to ease thy hardships in some manner, before she will release us? We see. Thou knowest that these are pointless orchestrations. Truly, we cannot fathom the thoughts of mortals at times, but this is an easy enough task--indeed, we can offer thee some fair advice now, some words of wisdom. Go to thine mistress and tell her this: if she dost wish us to counsel her subjects as to dealing with the paths of their fate, 'twould make such a task far easier were not every literal path in this land marked 'Abandon Hope, All Ye Who Enter Here.' 'Tis admirable, we suppose, how thee and thy rotting fellows dost continue thy onward struggles in these despairing wilds.
...nay, we are willing to improve thy frame of mind with words, but not with physical attentions, young Jack. Thou dost certainly have strange notions, and such unfathomable requests. We believe thou hast been grossly misinformed by thine mistress, or perhaps by that beast within your lake, that masquerades herself as one like us. For the Endless' actions do indeed guide this world forward...but that dost not mean that We canst make the earth move under thine feet in the way thou dost describe. And aye, we are indeed a true Endless, but that dost not warrant an invitation to show thee our 'raging pants dragon.'
Truly such cannot be found within our vestments, so we insist that thou unhand us. If thou dost wish to find ease in thy mind, be it thy modern custom to seek it with such lecherous intent? Grasping, thoughtless and foolish...whether dead or alive, mortals truly canst not change their ways. We canst not even begin to fathom the illogical actions that thou dost take, or the pleasures of no import that thou dost pointlessly choose to indulge. Indeed, we applaud thy tenacity, but truly, thou shouldst remove thyself from us before we must resort to using force.
...we did warn thee. Aye, now 'twould appear even mortals and the undead must sometimes find their other halves as we must, though we suppose our situation is not so direly literal as thine. There; we believe we didst relocate thy legs into that hedge, so thou canst cease thy piteous groaning. Another word of advice: if to keep thyself together is what thou truly desireth, young Jack, then thou must, from now on, try never to let them go.
Poll Vote!
Character: Milo Thatch
Series: Disney's Atlantis: The Lost Empire
Character Age: Mid-20s
Job: Cunning Linguist
Canon: Thousands of years ago, the city of Atlantis sank into the depths of the ocean, taking its secrets and advanced technology with it. By 1914, the legend of Atlantis is considered to be just that--a legend. Milo Thatch, linguist, cartographer, museum boiler room bitch-boy, and Atlantis-enthusiast has spent most of his life researching the lost continent his grandfather loved so much. Through a sudden turn of events, Milo ends up with the Shepherd's Journal, the "key" to finding Atlantis, and through an old man's bet with his grandfather, he also ends up with equipment, a team, and a plan: Find Atlantis, bring its mysterious power source to the surface, prove the world wrong.
Milo Thatch (with tangy Michael J. Fox voice-acting flavor!) is, in one word, a geek. He's friendly and well-meaning, but his life revolves around dead languages, maps, and proving his grandfather was right about the existence of Atlantis. Thus! Milo can be awkward and bumbling, and tends to babble excitedly about his theories to anyone who will listen--because why wouldn't everyone find the Atlantian grammatical structure as interesting as he does? This makes it hard for him to connect with the crew, who bullies him at first. Gradually, Milo wins their trust--only to have his trust in them broken when they want to exploit Atlantis' power source, even after they discover that Atlantis is still inhabited. It's at this point that Milo shows us he actually has a spine, and will go to great lengths to fight for what he thinks is right.
Sample Post:
Gentlemen! Big, hairy, purple gentlemen, oh boy. If I could have your attention for just a few minutes, I have some theories that I know you'll be interested in--right! Great, thank you! Just let me set up my slide projector. Now, I know you've been here for a long time, and you've probably come up with your own hypotheses about what's going on here, but bear with me. A fresh perspective on this whole situation might be just what you need. Even "literally" fresh, haha ... ha. Ahem. That leads me to our first slide.
This is an illustration of some of Seefud's, uh, unique wildlife. Now, the general consensus is that these so-called "undead," the ghoul-like creatures in the upper lefthand corner here, are asking for brains. And that's what it sounds like! We hear them say "brains" because we subconsciously interpret foreign sounds as their closest equivalent in our mother tongue. That's natural. But what these ghouls are really saying, the word they're repeating, over and over, is actually bahriins--an obscure Mesopotamian word that means, roughly translated, "we will lead." It's a very subtle difference, but, as you can see, an important one.
And that leads us to my next slide. This here is a sketch of the barrier, along with its estimated perimeter and height. Most consider it to be the force that keeps them trapped here, but I think that the barrier isn't just keeping these people in, it's also holding these--these "zombie" creatures prisoner. Why, I don't know, and by whom, well--I won't point fingers, but I think we all have a pretty good idea. For years, those detained here in Seefud have fought against the very creatures who are willing to help them escape! After extensively observing the routes taken by these ghouls, I began to notice a pattern, which I've charted out here. Circles--slow ones, but circles all the same--that start at the edge of Seefud and move inwards, stopping short of entering the actual encampment.
The barrier's power source, the way to disable the "shield" that's keeping you in and everyone else out, it's somewhere in the middle here. Some call it the "Fabled Center of Camp," and for years, that name was taken at face value. I propose that this Fabled Center, the location of the barrier's one weak point, is not in the true center Seefud, but here, at the coordinates 10v3.m3.p13453!
I'll take your questions now, gentlemen.
Poll Vote!
Character Name: Narumi Anju
Series: Gakuen Alice
Character Age: Early 20s
Job: Conflict Resolution
Canon: When 10 year-old Mikan's beloved friend suddenly decides to leave for a mysterious school called Alice Academy, Mikan runs away from home and treks across Japan in search of it. Upon arriving at the school in Tokyo she learns that it's an academy for children with magical powers. Encompassing primary to high school, Alice Academy seems like a haven for children to learn to control whatever their individual power (or "Alice") might be, a place where they can be accepted for who they are. In reality, however, this is mostly a facade for the far less charitable intentions of those who run the place. It's not long before Mikan starts to discover some of the school's darker secrets and get involved with those who are trying to improve the situation and make up for the tragedies of the past, or even just survive.
One of Mikan's greatest allies is her English teacher Narumi, himself a graduate of Alice Academy. Narumi has the "pheromonal inclination Alice", that is, the ability to use pheromones to make any human instantly and temporarily besotted with him. He can knock people out with a kiss, or have them obey his every command. Of course, as a responsible adult he only uses his power when he judges it necessary, and usually wears special jewelry to help him limit and control his Alice. His flamboyant outfits, tendency to heartmark cheerfully at everyone and apparent narcissism (he once made his class write him love letters as an exam) might give people doubts about his ability to act in a mature fashion. But even though he might appear flippant, when push comes to shove Narumi is a brave and loyal friend who would give his life to protect the ones he cares about.
Sample Entry:
Why hello there, aren't you a pretty thing? ♥ I never thought a gorilla could look so elegant! Could you go and find your mistress for me? Just tell her that Narumi-sensei's arrived to help guide these troubled little ones on their path to maturity. Yes, whether it's conflict of the heart or conflict of the fists, I'm the man for the job. While you're telling her that you can give her my compliments for picking such a lovely shade of violet for her animal familiars. ♥ It makes you all much easier to spot amongst all this swampland, and it's so nice to see that she's making an effort to brighten the place up for the campers! A place like this could look dull and lifeless so very easily, after all. It's the little conveniences like that that show that survival camp or not, she really must care about the people staying here. Go on now, I'm sure she's been dying to meet me. In fact she'll probably reward you handsomely for bringing her the news of my arrival!
Well, that seems to have done the trick. I guess I'll get stuck straight into it then! There's no use waiting around wasting time when I could be helping people. ♥ Now let's see, if I were a little troublemaker looking for a fight, where would I go? Somewhere with a thrill of danger, away from the eyes of adults. Somewhere a little bit risky... Aha! Those woods over there, which are no doubt forbidden for being too dangerous to venture into. They have that look about them, with all those flickering shadows and suggestively rustling branches. Yes, this is definitely invitingly forbidding enough to attract just the kind of children most in need of my assistance. ♥ Actually, if I didn't know better I'd say one of those trees was beckoning to me with its branches! Is there someone here with the plant controlling Alice? That would explain a lot. Time to investigate! ♥
I must say, when I accepted this position I never thought that dodging trees in the woods would be part of my job description, but life is full of surprises! I'm sorry my dear, whoever you are, but I'm afraid I can't return your affections. I'm not entirely sure what you're trying to prove by having the trees attempt to grope me, but I can tell you now that this is not a good way to go about showing your love to someone. In fact, I think you should stop. Now. ♥
... That's strange. My Alice should definitely have taken effect. It looks like I'm in a bit of a sticky situation, ahaha. But if reaching out to those in need means making my way through a gauntlet of oddly fixated foliage, then that's just what I'll have to do.
Poll Vote!
Character: Rei Kurosawa
Series: Fatal Frame 3
Character Age: 23
Job: Grief Counselor
Canon: Fatal Frame, known as Zero in Japan, is the survival horror series that focuses on exorcising spirits with nothing other than an antique camera. . . Well, you get a flash light, too. In the third installment, an urban legend of a curse cast on those who miss their dearly departed becomes real. As a tattoo grows, counting down their remaining time before they turn to ash, the three main characters must face the ghosts and themselves to survive to the next morning. Uncovering the tragedy within the mysterious house as they sleep, the game puts a new spin on having a bad dream.
Working as a professional photographer, Rei is a quiet and withdrawn woman. Painfully withdrawn even, as she refuses to leave her house, except for work assignments, after the tragic death of her fiancee. She prefers to immerse herself within her work and eventually uncovering the mystery of the curse, rather than dealing with her grief. Still, she's attentive and thoughtful, a surprising well of strength and comfort for others. Despite her depression, Rei often shows a glimmer of the capable woman she was before the accident.
As a note, Rei is from the end of the game.
Sample Entry:
I understand now. I can understand why this camp is here and why you brought me here, Ms. Sayre. Another bad dream. . . I thought it really could have been that, but I was "hired" for a reason, wasn't I? You might not have meant to, but. . . You knew we had a similar pain. If you could listen, please, then I might-I might be able to help.
When you lose someone close, it can be hard to keep going. Time stops, even if the world hasn't. You can't help thinking about it, over and over. . . But you don't want to. So, you build a barrier-A great, big wall-around you, so you don't have to think about it. So, time doesn't have to start again. It's easier that way. Eventually. . . You forget that there's anyone else. You miss them so much that you lose track of everything, and everyone, else.
But when you think of the dead so much, they won't rest-You can't rest. You get sucked in, and you don't realize it, but. . . Everyone else does too. At first, it might be people that understand, who don't want to move on too, but it starts to spread. This place. . . Your wish-Your dream has spread so much that people who don't know, who aren't involved, are here now. The zombies, the gorillas-Everything seems confusing and strange to anyone who doesn't know, but this is your dream. You want him to come back to life, but you know it won't be like he was. He might come back as a corpse, or with, ah, purple fur. . . The fact is that you made this whole world, so that you could forget.
You're not alone, Ms. Sayre. I can understand. . . And so can everyone else here now. They may not have, but they can feel your pain now since they've been separated from their friends and family for so long. They've felt your pain with the zombies, the tentacle, ah, monster-Well, a different kind of pain. . . Anyway, it might seem like you're all alone, but you're not. There's a lot of people around you that worry about you. When you're wandering around in the dark, they're there too, right behind you. It can be difficult to realize that. . . But I had to figure that out too.
It might be hard, but it's time to wake up and let this dream end. So, everyone can go back to where they belong. . . So, no one has to suffer any more, and Mr. Debussey can finally rest. And he, ah, can stop pinching me.
Poll Vote!
Character name: Julio Richter/"Rictor"
Series: Marvel Universe
Age: About 22 see argument here
Job: Powerlessness and Hopelessness Field Instructer
Canon: Mopey and self-destructive ever since a giant money-making event took away his awesome superpowers, Rictor enjoys such past times as running recklessly into gunfire and standing on ledges, contemplating whether or not to jump. In the past he'd fought demons and anti-mutant terrorists and now he argues with the boss and gets into fights he can't win with people on the street. He's not as fit as he used to be, he has a permanent three day growth and he's been wearing the same jacket for months. He snarks, he gripes, and he doubts himself.
Rictor first appeared in the 80s in a comic about mutants battling against a world that hates and fears them. Currently he works at a superpowered detective agency. Being the only non-powered guy amongst a bunch of people who can bend the laws of physics without much thought helps bring that extra special useless feeling. Lucky for them that he often saves the day by accident.
Sample Entry:
Um, hello, psychic toucans? Anybody? I'm, uh, here to investigate. Oh, yeah, smart move, Rictor, it's not like the psychics would have figured that out already. Way to be useless. I'm sorry we couldn't send any one better but I was told someone would meet me here to discuss the case, something about a Mr Gorilla suspecting his boyfriend of marrying someone on the astral plane? We've dealt with that kind of thing before.
Yeah, I'm just going to keep talking until somebody shows up. Man this place is weird. Does it seem eerily quiet to anyone else? I just have a bad feeling that this is a trap and a monster from the deep is going to spring out of nowhere and rampage all over me. You know, I don't want to be pessimistic but this non-appearing client act is a bad sign. Not that we have many clients that turn out to be bad guys but I prefer villians that show up and gloat when they kidnap you and put you in an inescapable trap. Then they can tell you their name and exactly how they want to kill you, and that way you know who to have traumatising flashbacks about. Not that I have any of those.
Does anyone hear that noise? No? Just me and the creepy overhanging trees here. Now the ground is shaking. What is that, an earthquake? Is somebody causing that? I wish I could still do that. Would make things so much easier.
--Oh, it's angry rampaging robot cows. Great. I should have known there would be angry robot cows just for me. I feel real special. It's not like my life isn't crazy enough. How do I get out of this one? Maybe if I hit them hard enough they'll tip over. Can I do robot cow tipping from a distance? Maybe if I throw a big enough rock. This one feels big enough to bring down the Hulk. Oh, man, I am so out of shape.
Yes, I hit it! And now it's changing direction and charging right at me. Good going, Ric, tick off the angry cow even more. Great job, way to fail. I really should have thought that one through. I'm just going to run now and try not to scream like a little girl.
Poll Vote!
Character: Eddie Riggs
Series: Brütal Legend
Character Age: Late 20s
Job: Ultimate Roadie
Canon: Brütal Legend is the story of Eddie Riggs, the Ultimate Roadie - a man who can tune any guitar, build any set, and fix anything. When he accidentally drips blood on a magical belt buckle, it awakens an ancient god of the apocalypse, and Eddie is sucked back in time into a long-forgotten Age of Metal, where human survivors are oppressed by demons (and other turncoat humans who've given up their freedom in exchange for power). Eddie puts his roadie know-how to good use and builds an army for Lars, a resistance leader who is charismatic but has no talent for organization. Thus begins a heavy metal odyssey, in which Eddie takes the fight to the demons for freedom, for justice, and for the glory of metal.
As Eddie himself says, a roadie's job is to make someone else look good - and that's as accurate an encapsulation of who he is as is possible. Eddie is a guy who does his job, and does it well: He's virtually unflappable, no matter what he's faced with (being transported to a hellish world of demons and cultists? No problem!) and is very confident, straight-forward and sincere, albeit with a snarky and sarcastic streak behind it. Eddie understands passion and devotion, especially when it comes to music (being a complete metal devotee himself, of course), and is never one to shy away from a problem - he prefers to kick its ass head-on. In the Age of Metal, he's not out for fame or glory; he helps the people there because not only would it be totally badass, it's the right damn thing to do.
Sample Post:
All right, Director Lady. Look, I know I'm the new guy here. I get that. But you know, I've been checking this place out for a few hours, and I've been thinking. The thing you've got going on here, with the whole “oh man, this place is hardcore and totally sucks but in a kinda badass way” deal and everything? I like it. I think you're definitely on the right track here, but do I think we can do better? Yeah, yeah I do.
I've put together a lot of gigs - not tryin' to brag or anything, but I know what goes into putting on a great show. So, just thought I'd throw out some suggestions here. Like I said, hope I'm not “overstepping my bounds” or anything as the new guy, but I think we could make this place a lot more awesome.
First - the zombies. I like 'em. What we need is more of them. Everyone's getting so used to the zombies as is, they're barely a distraction. Now, imagine if you woke up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom, and you had to cut your way through fifteen fuckin' zombies with a broadsword just to get there! How much cooler is that? Plus, killing things is always a pretty handy stress reliever, so I think everybody'd appreciate that a whole lot more.
Second - everyone should be given a sword, an axe, or a battle mace when they get here. For, you know, the zombies. None of this “shotgun” crap, either - unless you're gonna put it on a bitchin' ride or something like that, in which case that's pretty hardcore. Shotgun hot-rods can stay.
Third - the lake monster. Okay, can I just say, how cool is it that this place has a goddamn lake monster? That's awesome. My only problem is with its name. “Hey guys, I just got attacked by Marcy!” That totally ruins the retelling. What we need to do is rename it to “the Kraken.” Or, let's throw in another consonant there so everybody knows that she means business: “Hey guys, I just got attacked by the Krakken!” Doesn't that just sound like the name of something that'd kick your ass into next leap year?
Fourth - the loudspeakers. Yeah, you should really look into prefacing all the announcements with something that'd really get everyone's attention; blast some Priest, or maybe some Maiden. But that's not what I'm talking about here. When you're putting on a good show, you need something to catch everybody's eyes, too. So, three words: Pyro. Freakin' Technics. I know a guy who can get us some pretty awesome stuff for half the cost. Flares, Comets, Flash Pots, Gerb fountains... the works! Look, I get that you might be worried about starting a fire, but hey - we're in a swamp, man! There's water everywhere! You've never heard of a “Swamp Fire,” have you? Yeah, that's what I thought.
Anyway, I know you're probably busy what with being so cryptic and elusive and all that, but just thought I'd make some suggestions to help make this camp into something as badass as it's got the potential to be. Lemme know what you think, Director Lady.
Oh, and, uh... do you think we could get some better beer at the store? A keg or five, maybe? While you're at it, some more ammo for vehicle-mounted weaponry would kick ass, too. Awesome.
Poll Vote!
Remember!
- Applicants, respond anonymously.
- If you're going to do the whole "ask me if I voted you out!" thing, please state who you voted out.
- No speculating about the identity of the applicants!
Now VOTE. Closed!
Character Name: Fou-Lu
Series: Breath of Fire IV: The Unfading Ones
Age: Immortal; appears to be in his mid-twenties.
Job: Positivity Advisor
Canon: Breath of Fire IV takes place in a world guided by the actions of the immortal, godlike dragons known as Endless, who may sometimes take on human form. It begins when a boy named Ryu awakens without memories, knowing only that he must find the stranger who is his 'other half.' While searching, he gets embroiled in the treacherous conflict between two major powers, the Alliance and the mighty Fou Empire. Eventually, Ryu learns who his other half is: the First Emperor Fou-Lou, an Endless. Split into two when he was summoned six hundred years prior, Fou-Lou created the Empire according to the people's wishes, but then fell into a long sleep to recover his power and wait for Ryu to be born.
An unwilling antagonist, Fou-Lu is awakened then promptly pursued by Empire agents, who don't want him interfering in the brewing war. As a result, he spends much of his time getting shot out of the sky and then bandaged up by various good Samaritans. He may come off as powerful, haughty, bitter and reserved, but his attitude stems largely from his being unsure of how mortals think and feel. Indeed, it's implied that given a choice, he would much rather live a quiet, peaceful country life as a mortal himself. This turns out to be an impossible dream: the Empire hurts people he becomes involved with, gradually driving him into a kind of madness, and a need to stop his creation's depredations once and for all.
Note: His badly-constructed Shakespearean English is, unfortunately, canon.
Sample Post:
Ah. 'Twould seem this was a farce. 'Tis low indeed to masquerade as a despairing lady, and raise a barrier over our head when we come to see if we canst comfort thee in thy distress. Aye, we wouldst apologize for mistaking thee as a woman, undead one, but 'tis difficult when thou dost titter unrepentantly over thy 'booby trap.'
Very well, then. Thy name is Jack, and thy dread mistress Sayre dost wish us to counsel thee...to ease thy hardships in some manner, before she will release us? We see. Thou knowest that these are pointless orchestrations. Truly, we cannot fathom the thoughts of mortals at times, but this is an easy enough task--indeed, we can offer thee some fair advice now, some words of wisdom. Go to thine mistress and tell her this: if she dost wish us to counsel her subjects as to dealing with the paths of their fate, 'twould make such a task far easier were not every literal path in this land marked 'Abandon Hope, All Ye Who Enter Here.' 'Tis admirable, we suppose, how thee and thy rotting fellows dost continue thy onward struggles in these despairing wilds.
...nay, we are willing to improve thy frame of mind with words, but not with physical attentions, young Jack. Thou dost certainly have strange notions, and such unfathomable requests. We believe thou hast been grossly misinformed by thine mistress, or perhaps by that beast within your lake, that masquerades herself as one like us. For the Endless' actions do indeed guide this world forward...but that dost not mean that We canst make the earth move under thine feet in the way thou dost describe. And aye, we are indeed a true Endless, but that dost not warrant an invitation to show thee our 'raging pants dragon.'
Truly such cannot be found within our vestments, so we insist that thou unhand us. If thou dost wish to find ease in thy mind, be it thy modern custom to seek it with such lecherous intent? Grasping, thoughtless and foolish...whether dead or alive, mortals truly canst not change their ways. We canst not even begin to fathom the illogical actions that thou dost take, or the pleasures of no import that thou dost pointlessly choose to indulge. Indeed, we applaud thy tenacity, but truly, thou shouldst remove thyself from us before we must resort to using force.
...we did warn thee. Aye, now 'twould appear even mortals and the undead must sometimes find their other halves as we must, though we suppose our situation is not so direly literal as thine. There; we believe we didst relocate thy legs into that hedge, so thou canst cease thy piteous groaning. Another word of advice: if to keep thyself together is what thou truly desireth, young Jack, then thou must, from now on, try never to let them go.
Poll Vote!
Character: Milo Thatch
Series: Disney's Atlantis: The Lost Empire
Character Age: Mid-20s
Job: Cunning Linguist
Canon: Thousands of years ago, the city of Atlantis sank into the depths of the ocean, taking its secrets and advanced technology with it. By 1914, the legend of Atlantis is considered to be just that--a legend. Milo Thatch, linguist, cartographer, museum boiler room bitch-boy, and Atlantis-enthusiast has spent most of his life researching the lost continent his grandfather loved so much. Through a sudden turn of events, Milo ends up with the Shepherd's Journal, the "key" to finding Atlantis, and through an old man's bet with his grandfather, he also ends up with equipment, a team, and a plan: Find Atlantis, bring its mysterious power source to the surface, prove the world wrong.
Milo Thatch (with tangy Michael J. Fox voice-acting flavor!) is, in one word, a geek. He's friendly and well-meaning, but his life revolves around dead languages, maps, and proving his grandfather was right about the existence of Atlantis. Thus! Milo can be awkward and bumbling, and tends to babble excitedly about his theories to anyone who will listen--because why wouldn't everyone find the Atlantian grammatical structure as interesting as he does? This makes it hard for him to connect with the crew, who bullies him at first. Gradually, Milo wins their trust--only to have his trust in them broken when they want to exploit Atlantis' power source, even after they discover that Atlantis is still inhabited. It's at this point that Milo shows us he actually has a spine, and will go to great lengths to fight for what he thinks is right.
Sample Post:
Gentlemen! Big, hairy, purple gentlemen, oh boy. If I could have your attention for just a few minutes, I have some theories that I know you'll be interested in--right! Great, thank you! Just let me set up my slide projector. Now, I know you've been here for a long time, and you've probably come up with your own hypotheses about what's going on here, but bear with me. A fresh perspective on this whole situation might be just what you need. Even "literally" fresh, haha ... ha. Ahem. That leads me to our first slide.
This is an illustration of some of Seefud's, uh, unique wildlife. Now, the general consensus is that these so-called "undead," the ghoul-like creatures in the upper lefthand corner here, are asking for brains. And that's what it sounds like! We hear them say "brains" because we subconsciously interpret foreign sounds as their closest equivalent in our mother tongue. That's natural. But what these ghouls are really saying, the word they're repeating, over and over, is actually bahriins--an obscure Mesopotamian word that means, roughly translated, "we will lead." It's a very subtle difference, but, as you can see, an important one.
And that leads us to my next slide. This here is a sketch of the barrier, along with its estimated perimeter and height. Most consider it to be the force that keeps them trapped here, but I think that the barrier isn't just keeping these people in, it's also holding these--these "zombie" creatures prisoner. Why, I don't know, and by whom, well--I won't point fingers, but I think we all have a pretty good idea. For years, those detained here in Seefud have fought against the very creatures who are willing to help them escape! After extensively observing the routes taken by these ghouls, I began to notice a pattern, which I've charted out here. Circles--slow ones, but circles all the same--that start at the edge of Seefud and move inwards, stopping short of entering the actual encampment.
The barrier's power source, the way to disable the "shield" that's keeping you in and everyone else out, it's somewhere in the middle here. Some call it the "Fabled Center of Camp," and for years, that name was taken at face value. I propose that this Fabled Center, the location of the barrier's one weak point, is not in the true center Seefud, but here, at the coordinates 10v3.m3.p13453!
I'll take your questions now, gentlemen.
Poll Vote!
Character Name: Narumi Anju
Series: Gakuen Alice
Character Age: Early 20s
Job: Conflict Resolution
Canon: When 10 year-old Mikan's beloved friend suddenly decides to leave for a mysterious school called Alice Academy, Mikan runs away from home and treks across Japan in search of it. Upon arriving at the school in Tokyo she learns that it's an academy for children with magical powers. Encompassing primary to high school, Alice Academy seems like a haven for children to learn to control whatever their individual power (or "Alice") might be, a place where they can be accepted for who they are. In reality, however, this is mostly a facade for the far less charitable intentions of those who run the place. It's not long before Mikan starts to discover some of the school's darker secrets and get involved with those who are trying to improve the situation and make up for the tragedies of the past, or even just survive.
One of Mikan's greatest allies is her English teacher Narumi, himself a graduate of Alice Academy. Narumi has the "pheromonal inclination Alice", that is, the ability to use pheromones to make any human instantly and temporarily besotted with him. He can knock people out with a kiss, or have them obey his every command. Of course, as a responsible adult he only uses his power when he judges it necessary, and usually wears special jewelry to help him limit and control his Alice. His flamboyant outfits, tendency to heartmark cheerfully at everyone and apparent narcissism (he once made his class write him love letters as an exam) might give people doubts about his ability to act in a mature fashion. But even though he might appear flippant, when push comes to shove Narumi is a brave and loyal friend who would give his life to protect the ones he cares about.
Sample Entry:
Why hello there, aren't you a pretty thing? ♥ I never thought a gorilla could look so elegant! Could you go and find your mistress for me? Just tell her that Narumi-sensei's arrived to help guide these troubled little ones on their path to maturity. Yes, whether it's conflict of the heart or conflict of the fists, I'm the man for the job. While you're telling her that you can give her my compliments for picking such a lovely shade of violet for her animal familiars. ♥ It makes you all much easier to spot amongst all this swampland, and it's so nice to see that she's making an effort to brighten the place up for the campers! A place like this could look dull and lifeless so very easily, after all. It's the little conveniences like that that show that survival camp or not, she really must care about the people staying here. Go on now, I'm sure she's been dying to meet me. In fact she'll probably reward you handsomely for bringing her the news of my arrival!
Well, that seems to have done the trick. I guess I'll get stuck straight into it then! There's no use waiting around wasting time when I could be helping people. ♥ Now let's see, if I were a little troublemaker looking for a fight, where would I go? Somewhere with a thrill of danger, away from the eyes of adults. Somewhere a little bit risky... Aha! Those woods over there, which are no doubt forbidden for being too dangerous to venture into. They have that look about them, with all those flickering shadows and suggestively rustling branches. Yes, this is definitely invitingly forbidding enough to attract just the kind of children most in need of my assistance. ♥ Actually, if I didn't know better I'd say one of those trees was beckoning to me with its branches! Is there someone here with the plant controlling Alice? That would explain a lot. Time to investigate! ♥
I must say, when I accepted this position I never thought that dodging trees in the woods would be part of my job description, but life is full of surprises! I'm sorry my dear, whoever you are, but I'm afraid I can't return your affections. I'm not entirely sure what you're trying to prove by having the trees attempt to grope me, but I can tell you now that this is not a good way to go about showing your love to someone. In fact, I think you should stop. Now. ♥
... That's strange. My Alice should definitely have taken effect. It looks like I'm in a bit of a sticky situation, ahaha. But if reaching out to those in need means making my way through a gauntlet of oddly fixated foliage, then that's just what I'll have to do.
Poll Vote!
Character: Rei Kurosawa
Series: Fatal Frame 3
Character Age: 23
Job: Grief Counselor
Canon: Fatal Frame, known as Zero in Japan, is the survival horror series that focuses on exorcising spirits with nothing other than an antique camera. . . Well, you get a flash light, too. In the third installment, an urban legend of a curse cast on those who miss their dearly departed becomes real. As a tattoo grows, counting down their remaining time before they turn to ash, the three main characters must face the ghosts and themselves to survive to the next morning. Uncovering the tragedy within the mysterious house as they sleep, the game puts a new spin on having a bad dream.
Working as a professional photographer, Rei is a quiet and withdrawn woman. Painfully withdrawn even, as she refuses to leave her house, except for work assignments, after the tragic death of her fiancee. She prefers to immerse herself within her work and eventually uncovering the mystery of the curse, rather than dealing with her grief. Still, she's attentive and thoughtful, a surprising well of strength and comfort for others. Despite her depression, Rei often shows a glimmer of the capable woman she was before the accident.
As a note, Rei is from the end of the game.
Sample Entry:
I understand now. I can understand why this camp is here and why you brought me here, Ms. Sayre. Another bad dream. . . I thought it really could have been that, but I was "hired" for a reason, wasn't I? You might not have meant to, but. . . You knew we had a similar pain. If you could listen, please, then I might-I might be able to help.
When you lose someone close, it can be hard to keep going. Time stops, even if the world hasn't. You can't help thinking about it, over and over. . . But you don't want to. So, you build a barrier-A great, big wall-around you, so you don't have to think about it. So, time doesn't have to start again. It's easier that way. Eventually. . . You forget that there's anyone else. You miss them so much that you lose track of everything, and everyone, else.
But when you think of the dead so much, they won't rest-You can't rest. You get sucked in, and you don't realize it, but. . . Everyone else does too. At first, it might be people that understand, who don't want to move on too, but it starts to spread. This place. . . Your wish-Your dream has spread so much that people who don't know, who aren't involved, are here now. The zombies, the gorillas-Everything seems confusing and strange to anyone who doesn't know, but this is your dream. You want him to come back to life, but you know it won't be like he was. He might come back as a corpse, or with, ah, purple fur. . . The fact is that you made this whole world, so that you could forget.
You're not alone, Ms. Sayre. I can understand. . . And so can everyone else here now. They may not have, but they can feel your pain now since they've been separated from their friends and family for so long. They've felt your pain with the zombies, the tentacle, ah, monster-Well, a different kind of pain. . . Anyway, it might seem like you're all alone, but you're not. There's a lot of people around you that worry about you. When you're wandering around in the dark, they're there too, right behind you. It can be difficult to realize that. . . But I had to figure that out too.
It might be hard, but it's time to wake up and let this dream end. So, everyone can go back to where they belong. . . So, no one has to suffer any more, and Mr. Debussey can finally rest. And he, ah, can stop pinching me.
Poll Vote!
Character name: Julio Richter/"Rictor"
Series: Marvel Universe
Age: About 22 see argument here
Job: Powerlessness and Hopelessness Field Instructer
Canon: Mopey and self-destructive ever since a giant money-making event took away his awesome superpowers, Rictor enjoys such past times as running recklessly into gunfire and standing on ledges, contemplating whether or not to jump. In the past he'd fought demons and anti-mutant terrorists and now he argues with the boss and gets into fights he can't win with people on the street. He's not as fit as he used to be, he has a permanent three day growth and he's been wearing the same jacket for months. He snarks, he gripes, and he doubts himself.
Rictor first appeared in the 80s in a comic about mutants battling against a world that hates and fears them. Currently he works at a superpowered detective agency. Being the only non-powered guy amongst a bunch of people who can bend the laws of physics without much thought helps bring that extra special useless feeling. Lucky for them that he often saves the day by accident.
Sample Entry:
Um, hello, psychic toucans? Anybody? I'm, uh, here to investigate. Oh, yeah, smart move, Rictor, it's not like the psychics would have figured that out already. Way to be useless. I'm sorry we couldn't send any one better but I was told someone would meet me here to discuss the case, something about a Mr Gorilla suspecting his boyfriend of marrying someone on the astral plane? We've dealt with that kind of thing before.
Yeah, I'm just going to keep talking until somebody shows up. Man this place is weird. Does it seem eerily quiet to anyone else? I just have a bad feeling that this is a trap and a monster from the deep is going to spring out of nowhere and rampage all over me. You know, I don't want to be pessimistic but this non-appearing client act is a bad sign. Not that we have many clients that turn out to be bad guys but I prefer villians that show up and gloat when they kidnap you and put you in an inescapable trap. Then they can tell you their name and exactly how they want to kill you, and that way you know who to have traumatising flashbacks about. Not that I have any of those.
Does anyone hear that noise? No? Just me and the creepy overhanging trees here. Now the ground is shaking. What is that, an earthquake? Is somebody causing that? I wish I could still do that. Would make things so much easier.
--Oh, it's angry rampaging robot cows. Great. I should have known there would be angry robot cows just for me. I feel real special. It's not like my life isn't crazy enough. How do I get out of this one? Maybe if I hit them hard enough they'll tip over. Can I do robot cow tipping from a distance? Maybe if I throw a big enough rock. This one feels big enough to bring down the Hulk. Oh, man, I am so out of shape.
Yes, I hit it! And now it's changing direction and charging right at me. Good going, Ric, tick off the angry cow even more. Great job, way to fail. I really should have thought that one through. I'm just going to run now and try not to scream like a little girl.
Poll Vote!
Character: Eddie Riggs
Series: Brütal Legend
Character Age: Late 20s
Job: Ultimate Roadie
Canon: Brütal Legend is the story of Eddie Riggs, the Ultimate Roadie - a man who can tune any guitar, build any set, and fix anything. When he accidentally drips blood on a magical belt buckle, it awakens an ancient god of the apocalypse, and Eddie is sucked back in time into a long-forgotten Age of Metal, where human survivors are oppressed by demons (and other turncoat humans who've given up their freedom in exchange for power). Eddie puts his roadie know-how to good use and builds an army for Lars, a resistance leader who is charismatic but has no talent for organization. Thus begins a heavy metal odyssey, in which Eddie takes the fight to the demons for freedom, for justice, and for the glory of metal.
As Eddie himself says, a roadie's job is to make someone else look good - and that's as accurate an encapsulation of who he is as is possible. Eddie is a guy who does his job, and does it well: He's virtually unflappable, no matter what he's faced with (being transported to a hellish world of demons and cultists? No problem!) and is very confident, straight-forward and sincere, albeit with a snarky and sarcastic streak behind it. Eddie understands passion and devotion, especially when it comes to music (being a complete metal devotee himself, of course), and is never one to shy away from a problem - he prefers to kick its ass head-on. In the Age of Metal, he's not out for fame or glory; he helps the people there because not only would it be totally badass, it's the right damn thing to do.
Sample Post:
All right, Director Lady. Look, I know I'm the new guy here. I get that. But you know, I've been checking this place out for a few hours, and I've been thinking. The thing you've got going on here, with the whole “oh man, this place is hardcore and totally sucks but in a kinda badass way” deal and everything? I like it. I think you're definitely on the right track here, but do I think we can do better? Yeah, yeah I do.
I've put together a lot of gigs - not tryin' to brag or anything, but I know what goes into putting on a great show. So, just thought I'd throw out some suggestions here. Like I said, hope I'm not “overstepping my bounds” or anything as the new guy, but I think we could make this place a lot more awesome.
First - the zombies. I like 'em. What we need is more of them. Everyone's getting so used to the zombies as is, they're barely a distraction. Now, imagine if you woke up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom, and you had to cut your way through fifteen fuckin' zombies with a broadsword just to get there! How much cooler is that? Plus, killing things is always a pretty handy stress reliever, so I think everybody'd appreciate that a whole lot more.
Second - everyone should be given a sword, an axe, or a battle mace when they get here. For, you know, the zombies. None of this “shotgun” crap, either - unless you're gonna put it on a bitchin' ride or something like that, in which case that's pretty hardcore. Shotgun hot-rods can stay.
Third - the lake monster. Okay, can I just say, how cool is it that this place has a goddamn lake monster? That's awesome. My only problem is with its name. “Hey guys, I just got attacked by Marcy!” That totally ruins the retelling. What we need to do is rename it to “the Kraken.” Or, let's throw in another consonant there so everybody knows that she means business: “Hey guys, I just got attacked by the Krakken!” Doesn't that just sound like the name of something that'd kick your ass into next leap year?
Fourth - the loudspeakers. Yeah, you should really look into prefacing all the announcements with something that'd really get everyone's attention; blast some Priest, or maybe some Maiden. But that's not what I'm talking about here. When you're putting on a good show, you need something to catch everybody's eyes, too. So, three words: Pyro. Freakin' Technics. I know a guy who can get us some pretty awesome stuff for half the cost. Flares, Comets, Flash Pots, Gerb fountains... the works! Look, I get that you might be worried about starting a fire, but hey - we're in a swamp, man! There's water everywhere! You've never heard of a “Swamp Fire,” have you? Yeah, that's what I thought.
Anyway, I know you're probably busy what with being so cryptic and elusive and all that, but just thought I'd make some suggestions to help make this camp into something as badass as it's got the potential to be. Lemme know what you think, Director Lady.
Oh, and, uh... do you think we could get some better beer at the store? A keg or five, maybe? While you're at it, some more ammo for vehicle-mounted weaponry would kick ass, too. Awesome.
Poll Vote!