IT'S CONQUERIN' TIME

[latrine_orderly]

In the developmental progress of mankind, there have been many false technological advents. Just as we now view eight tracks and casette tapes of things of a long-forgotten past, so too our descendants will view ELECTRICITY ITSELF! GO BACK, my children, back to the days when you wound your clock and it ran twenty minutes fast and someone in your

Comments

[redhaired_anita]

[ping]

[latrine_orderly]

*MY ROBOT MAKES ME SO INHERENTLY SUPERIOR TO YOU THAT I DON'T HAVE TO PAY ATTENTION IF YOU DO NOT VERBALIZE YOUR INTENT 8D*

[redhaired_anita]

What. The hell.

[latrine_orderly]

If you don't get it just keep quiet! You don't want people thinking you're slow.

[daisoujou]

Really? Is that the best you can do? PATHETIC. I'VE SEEN BOLOGNA BETTER! >D

[latrine_orderly]

BOLOGNA MAY BE DELICIOUS, BUT THIS IS DEADLY!

[daisoujou]

Oh, is it? *sup? Icon bot*

[as_apple_pie]

Impressive.

[latrine_orderly]

It shoots twenty kinds of projectiles!

[as_apple_pie]

Like what, Excel? Rubber bands, pens, pencils...?

[latrine_orderly]

Yes, yes, yes; also giant spitwads, popsicle sticks, vipers, kitchen knives, bee bombs, ninja stars, Molotov cocktails, rocks of varying size, negatively-charged ectoplasm, thumb tacks, puppies, tranquilizer darts, poison ivy, snowballs (with rocks in them), piranhas, and (my personal favorite) water balloons filled with camp virii!

[knowing_smile]

... very impressive, Excel-san.

[latrine_orderly]

And completely biodegradable!

[knowing_smile]

That will come in handy when it inevitably breaks down. Good to see ACROSS showing concern for the environment during its conquest.

[latrine_orderly]

And it has twenty different kinds of projectiles! TWENTY! All that with room for a life-sized statue of Lord Il Palazzo in the cockpit! Is "cockpit" really a good word when it's two girls doing the piloting? I'd think it's more of a box office.

[kabapenis]

*Suddenly, and without warning, a booming voice echoes from what appears to be a system of multiple hidden loudpspeakers* So, ACROSS shows it's true colors at last... but to no avail! For where the forces of Evil convene, the Municipal Force Daitenzin will be there to opposse them!

[latrine_orderly]

What? WHO SPEAKS SUCH FILTHY LIES OF FILTH AND LYING? Show yourself!

[kabapenis]

*But the voice DENIES your requests for clarity! It remains hidden!*

Lies? Only if by lies mean the truth of final and complete truthiness! I have dallied long enough in countering this threat to camp's security! Your scheme's end here! For the one thing that can counter a robot like that, that pinnacle of man-made technology, that perversion of the fruits of labour wrought by the capitalstic society... IS THIS! GO, ANTI-ACROSS DEVICE OMEGA 4- BOULDERDAAAASSSHHH!!!! HAAAJIMMEEE!

*And suddenly, from within the woods, a great commotion can be heard. In a secluded glade in the woods, a curious hatch slowly opens, and an elevator-mechanism brings forth a fearsome, hulking shape. Birds take flight, wildlife is frightened into a stampede. Here it comes! The first epic showdown between ACROSS and Daitenzin! ... Any minute now! Soon... ONE! THAT'S ONE BOOMING STEP BEING TAKEN! And there's a second one! And.... third one's taking it's time...*

[latrine_orderly]

*EXCEL QUIVERS WITH FEAR!*

*AND TERROR!*

*AND PANIC!*

*AND ANTICI... PATION!*

...oh, I see how it is, Mr. Disembodied Voice! You think you can just MOCK the sanctity and ingenuity of ACROSS by moving really, really slowly? NUTS TO THAT, AND PEANUTS TOO! See how you like the INK GUN!

*the ink ray happens to be a rapidfire of ball-point pens*