Fic: To The Pain (29/41)
Title: To The Pain, Chapter 29
Rating: R
Warnings: Kissing! (Ianto and Brendan, you have been warned…)
Spoilers: Season One thru End of Days (1x13)
Pairings: Jack/Ianto; Ianto/Brendan
Disclaimer: Torchwood and all its wonderfulness belong to Russell T. Davies and the Mighty Beeb. Just goofin' around!
Summary: In which Brendan has to leave…
Notes: Thanks again to everyone for making my birthday so special! *hugs* Sequel to Vizzini’s Rule; previous chapters of To The Pain can be found here. Thanks to my wonderful beta
thrace_adams for all the support - any mistakes are mine!
To The Pain: Chapter Twenty-Nine
When Ianto walked into his flat, he found Jamie and Brendan cozied up on the sofa, chatting like old friends. He had sent the two of them back to his place once he’d decided to purchase the BMW. There was no need for all of them to stand around while Ramsey completed the necessary paperwork.
Brendan looked slightly guilty and Jamie was definitely angry again, so Ianto assumed he’d been the topic of conversation.
“Am I in trouble again?” he asked as he stripped off his coat.
“Not again,” Jamie growled. “Still.”
“Sorry, Ianto,” Brendan said with a weak smile. “We were just talking and somehow…” He waved his hands helplessly.
Ianto laughed and walked over to sit in the chair near the sofa. “Don’t worry about it. That’s Jamie’s gift - he can get anyone to talk about anything when he puts his mind to it. He’s practically a hypnotist.”
They all laughed at that and the tension in the room eased a bit. It lessened even further when Ianto folded his hands and looked pleadingly at Jamie and asked, “Can the beating wait until after Brendan leaves? Wouldn’t want to shock the boy.”
Brendan chuckled and then sighed. “Speaking of leaving…”
Ianto tried to smile and asked as casually as he could manage, “Need to be heading back?”
“Yeah,” Brendan admitted reluctantly. “I need to ring Britt and see how he’s doing with everything.
Ianto nodded, not trusting himself to speak.
“Dammit!” Jamie exclaimed, making them all jump.
“What?”
“I forgot to get petrol on the way back from the dealership. Brendan, you were supposed to remind me to stop.”
“Uh… sorry?” Brendan offered. It was clear he had no idea what Jamie was talking about.
“Hell, I guess I better go do that right now while I’m thinking about it,” Jamie said, pulling himself off the sofa, the other two standing along with him. “Brendan, it was a pleasure. It’s nice to know I’m not the only one worrying about Mr. Incommunicado here.” He ignored Ianto’s sound of protest and shook Brendan’s hand. “Keep in touch, okay?”
Brendan nodded and said, “You too, Jamie. I’d like to meet Mark sometime.”
“I think we could arrange that. Ianto, I’ll see you in a bit. Brendan, drive safely.”
Ianto and Brendan sat in silence for a long moment after the door closed behind Jamie.
“I wish I didn’t have to go,” Brendan said quietly.
Ianto moved to put his arm around Brendan and sighed when Brendan’s arms wrapped around his waist, the curly head coming to rest on his shoulder. He moved them carefully down to the sofa, not letting go of Brendan. There was another long quiet moment before either of them spoke again.
“Brendan, I… I just wanted to say thank you again. Seeing you, being with you… it’s made a world of difference to me. I just - I need you to know that.”
“I do. And I’m glad. I really appreciate your help with that case. I never thought anything would come of it, but you and your team, you’re really great. I think Gary will be able to let go of Ryan now and just be happy for the time they had.” Brendan cleared his throat and looked up at Ianto. “And I’m going to do the same.”
Ianto bit back another apology and then nodded. “Me too,” he said roughly.
Brendan reached up and stroked Ianto’s cheek. He dropped his gaze to Ianto’s lips and then moved forward. Ianto hesitated for a moment, not wanting to make this harder on either of them, but Brendan’s parted lips, the heat in his green eyes proved irresistible.
With a lost little moan, Ianto leaned down and touched his lips to Brendan’s. The kiss was gentle and soft, lips moving over lips with no rush or urgency. Ianto threaded his hand through Brendan’s dark curls, tilting his head and sinking into the kiss. Brendan gave a soft sigh and parted his lips, opening to Ianto.
Ianto felt the spark between them begin to smolder again, felt Brendan’s hand tighten in his shirt, felt his own response as he pulled Brendan tighter against him. Ianto bit Brendan’s lower lip gently and then soothed the spot with his tongue. When Brendan’s moan vibrated against his mouth, Ianto echoed it and slid his tongue inside, tasting and teasing. They moved together slowly, both of them just making it last as long as they could.
Ianto wanted nothing more than to pull Brendan off the sofa and take him to the bedroom, to lose himself in Brendan’s body one last time, but he knew that would fall into the realm of really bad ideas. Sighing with regret, Ianto began to pull back from the kiss, lingering once again over the feel of Brendan’s soft lips against his, memorizing the taste of him, the curve of his mouth. He ran his tongue across that one crooked tooth one last time and ended the kiss.
Brendan’s sigh filled the room, but he made no argument. They held one another for a few more precious minutes and then Brendan spoke.
“I need to go.”
“Yeah,” Ianto agreed though neither of them made any effort to move.
“You’ll be okay?” Brendan asked softly.
“I think so, yeah. For the first time in months. You?”
“Yeah. I’ve got a fleet of trucks that need their yearly overhaul. Being busy always helps.”
“I hear that.”
“If… if…” Brendan shook his head and pulled out of Ianto’s arms. “Never mind. I’m gonna go grab my stuff,” he said and headed for Ianto’s bedroom.
Ianto followed and leaned on the doorframe. “August,” he said quietly. “We gave him six months before we announce he’s gone and move on. If he’s not back by then?” Ianto trailed off, leaving the thought unfinished.
Brendan smiled. “August. It’s not so long to wait.”
“No, Brendan, no. I don’t want you putting your life on hold, okay? Jack has ruined enough already, I don’t want you waiting too.”
“What about you?” Brendan asked, moving to stand in front of Ianto. “Just because you’re waiting for him to come back to Torchwood, doesn’t mean you -”
“I have to know,” Ianto interrupted, looking miserable. “I have to talk to him again and figure out how I feel.”
Brendan nodded. “I know,” he whispered. “I’m sorry. Just got caught up in the idea for a second.”
Ianto reached out and put a hand on Brendan’s shoulder, moving it to his cheek after a moment. He stepped forward and gave Brendan a chaste kiss on the mouth and then one on either cheek. “Safe travels,” he said quietly.
Brendan clutched at Ianto’s arm and nodded, eyes still closed. He finally looked up at Ianto. “Take care of yourself, Ianto. I’ll see you in a few weeks.”
Ianto nodded and smiled. “Sounds good.”
He walked Brendan to the door and stood on the front step, watching as he fired up the Antichrist and drove away. Ianto watched until the Rover was out of sight and then turned to walk back inside the flat. Once he’d closed the door, Ianto leaned against it, his face in his hands. He slid down the door until he reached the floor and pulled his knees to his chest. He sat there for some time, thinking about Brendan, about Jack, about what he wanted. What he had told Brendan was right - he needed to talk to Jack again. If he ever comes back that is, Ianto thought sadly. He needed to know where Jack had been, why he’d left, if leaving had been worth it, if he still cared, if anything in the visions... dreams… whatever… that Ianto had been having was real.
He needed to know.
Ianto was still sitting there when Jamie returned about ten minutes later. There was a perfunctory knock at the door and then Jamie tried to push it open.
“Hey!”
“Sorry,” Ianto said dully.
“Ianto? What are you doing on the floor?” Jamie asked as Ianto moved out of the path of the door.
Jamie came in and dropped to the floor next to Ianto. He sat in silence for a second and then nudged Ianto with his shoulder. “Hey.”
“Hey.”
“You okay?”
Ianto sighed. “Yeah.”
“Fail.”
“What?” Ianto asked, obviously confused.
“You’re not okay. You’re sitting on the floor and moping. Why can’t you just say it?”
Ianto glared at Jamie. “Just how much did Brendan tell you?”
“Enough.” Jamie put his arm around Ianto pulled him close. “But nothing I didn’t already know.”
Ianto sighed again and let his head rest on Jamie’s shoulder. “I’m not okay. Happy now?”
Jamie huffed out an exasperated sigh. “No, I’m not happy. You’re miserable, how can I be happy?”
“This is why I didn’t want to bother you with this… mess. It’s bad enough that I feel like this, no need to spread it around.”
Jamie sat quietly for another long moment. “Berk,” he said teasingly with another nudge.
“Hey!”
“Plonker.”
“Jamie!”
“So what’s the deal with you and Brendan?” Jamie asked.
Ianto rolled his eyes and got up, reaching down to pull Jamie off the floor as well. “Come on, Smith. Lunch.”
“You’re suggesting food? Who are you and what have you done with Ianto?”
“You want lunch or not?” Ianto asked.
“Yeah, Jones,” Jamie laughed, grabbing Ianto in a quick hug. “Sounds good.”
TBC in Chapter Thirty
Rating: R
Warnings: Kissing! (Ianto and Brendan, you have been warned…)
Spoilers: Season One thru End of Days (1x13)
Pairings: Jack/Ianto; Ianto/Brendan
Disclaimer: Torchwood and all its wonderfulness belong to Russell T. Davies and the Mighty Beeb. Just goofin' around!
Summary: In which Brendan has to leave…
Notes: Thanks again to everyone for making my birthday so special! *hugs* Sequel to Vizzini’s Rule; previous chapters of To The Pain can be found here. Thanks to my wonderful beta
thrace_adams for all the support - any mistakes are mine!
To The Pain: Chapter Twenty-Nine
When Ianto walked into his flat, he found Jamie and Brendan cozied up on the sofa, chatting like old friends. He had sent the two of them back to his place once he’d decided to purchase the BMW. There was no need for all of them to stand around while Ramsey completed the necessary paperwork.
Brendan looked slightly guilty and Jamie was definitely angry again, so Ianto assumed he’d been the topic of conversation.
“Am I in trouble again?” he asked as he stripped off his coat.
“Not again,” Jamie growled. “Still.”
“Sorry, Ianto,” Brendan said with a weak smile. “We were just talking and somehow…” He waved his hands helplessly.
Ianto laughed and walked over to sit in the chair near the sofa. “Don’t worry about it. That’s Jamie’s gift - he can get anyone to talk about anything when he puts his mind to it. He’s practically a hypnotist.”
They all laughed at that and the tension in the room eased a bit. It lessened even further when Ianto folded his hands and looked pleadingly at Jamie and asked, “Can the beating wait until after Brendan leaves? Wouldn’t want to shock the boy.”
Brendan chuckled and then sighed. “Speaking of leaving…”
Ianto tried to smile and asked as casually as he could manage, “Need to be heading back?”
“Yeah,” Brendan admitted reluctantly. “I need to ring Britt and see how he’s doing with everything.
Ianto nodded, not trusting himself to speak.
“Dammit!” Jamie exclaimed, making them all jump.
“What?”
“I forgot to get petrol on the way back from the dealership. Brendan, you were supposed to remind me to stop.”
“Uh… sorry?” Brendan offered. It was clear he had no idea what Jamie was talking about.
“Hell, I guess I better go do that right now while I’m thinking about it,” Jamie said, pulling himself off the sofa, the other two standing along with him. “Brendan, it was a pleasure. It’s nice to know I’m not the only one worrying about Mr. Incommunicado here.” He ignored Ianto’s sound of protest and shook Brendan’s hand. “Keep in touch, okay?”
Brendan nodded and said, “You too, Jamie. I’d like to meet Mark sometime.”
“I think we could arrange that. Ianto, I’ll see you in a bit. Brendan, drive safely.”
Ianto and Brendan sat in silence for a long moment after the door closed behind Jamie.
“I wish I didn’t have to go,” Brendan said quietly.
Ianto moved to put his arm around Brendan and sighed when Brendan’s arms wrapped around his waist, the curly head coming to rest on his shoulder. He moved them carefully down to the sofa, not letting go of Brendan. There was another long quiet moment before either of them spoke again.
“Brendan, I… I just wanted to say thank you again. Seeing you, being with you… it’s made a world of difference to me. I just - I need you to know that.”
“I do. And I’m glad. I really appreciate your help with that case. I never thought anything would come of it, but you and your team, you’re really great. I think Gary will be able to let go of Ryan now and just be happy for the time they had.” Brendan cleared his throat and looked up at Ianto. “And I’m going to do the same.”
Ianto bit back another apology and then nodded. “Me too,” he said roughly.
Brendan reached up and stroked Ianto’s cheek. He dropped his gaze to Ianto’s lips and then moved forward. Ianto hesitated for a moment, not wanting to make this harder on either of them, but Brendan’s parted lips, the heat in his green eyes proved irresistible.
With a lost little moan, Ianto leaned down and touched his lips to Brendan’s. The kiss was gentle and soft, lips moving over lips with no rush or urgency. Ianto threaded his hand through Brendan’s dark curls, tilting his head and sinking into the kiss. Brendan gave a soft sigh and parted his lips, opening to Ianto.
Ianto felt the spark between them begin to smolder again, felt Brendan’s hand tighten in his shirt, felt his own response as he pulled Brendan tighter against him. Ianto bit Brendan’s lower lip gently and then soothed the spot with his tongue. When Brendan’s moan vibrated against his mouth, Ianto echoed it and slid his tongue inside, tasting and teasing. They moved together slowly, both of them just making it last as long as they could.
Ianto wanted nothing more than to pull Brendan off the sofa and take him to the bedroom, to lose himself in Brendan’s body one last time, but he knew that would fall into the realm of really bad ideas. Sighing with regret, Ianto began to pull back from the kiss, lingering once again over the feel of Brendan’s soft lips against his, memorizing the taste of him, the curve of his mouth. He ran his tongue across that one crooked tooth one last time and ended the kiss.
Brendan’s sigh filled the room, but he made no argument. They held one another for a few more precious minutes and then Brendan spoke.
“I need to go.”
“Yeah,” Ianto agreed though neither of them made any effort to move.
“You’ll be okay?” Brendan asked softly.
“I think so, yeah. For the first time in months. You?”
“Yeah. I’ve got a fleet of trucks that need their yearly overhaul. Being busy always helps.”
“I hear that.”
“If… if…” Brendan shook his head and pulled out of Ianto’s arms. “Never mind. I’m gonna go grab my stuff,” he said and headed for Ianto’s bedroom.
Ianto followed and leaned on the doorframe. “August,” he said quietly. “We gave him six months before we announce he’s gone and move on. If he’s not back by then?” Ianto trailed off, leaving the thought unfinished.
Brendan smiled. “August. It’s not so long to wait.”
“No, Brendan, no. I don’t want you putting your life on hold, okay? Jack has ruined enough already, I don’t want you waiting too.”
“What about you?” Brendan asked, moving to stand in front of Ianto. “Just because you’re waiting for him to come back to Torchwood, doesn’t mean you -”
“I have to know,” Ianto interrupted, looking miserable. “I have to talk to him again and figure out how I feel.”
Brendan nodded. “I know,” he whispered. “I’m sorry. Just got caught up in the idea for a second.”
Ianto reached out and put a hand on Brendan’s shoulder, moving it to his cheek after a moment. He stepped forward and gave Brendan a chaste kiss on the mouth and then one on either cheek. “Safe travels,” he said quietly.
Brendan clutched at Ianto’s arm and nodded, eyes still closed. He finally looked up at Ianto. “Take care of yourself, Ianto. I’ll see you in a few weeks.”
Ianto nodded and smiled. “Sounds good.”
He walked Brendan to the door and stood on the front step, watching as he fired up the Antichrist and drove away. Ianto watched until the Rover was out of sight and then turned to walk back inside the flat. Once he’d closed the door, Ianto leaned against it, his face in his hands. He slid down the door until he reached the floor and pulled his knees to his chest. He sat there for some time, thinking about Brendan, about Jack, about what he wanted. What he had told Brendan was right - he needed to talk to Jack again. If he ever comes back that is, Ianto thought sadly. He needed to know where Jack had been, why he’d left, if leaving had been worth it, if he still cared, if anything in the visions... dreams… whatever… that Ianto had been having was real.
He needed to know.
Ianto was still sitting there when Jamie returned about ten minutes later. There was a perfunctory knock at the door and then Jamie tried to push it open.
“Hey!”
“Sorry,” Ianto said dully.
“Ianto? What are you doing on the floor?” Jamie asked as Ianto moved out of the path of the door.
Jamie came in and dropped to the floor next to Ianto. He sat in silence for a second and then nudged Ianto with his shoulder. “Hey.”
“Hey.”
“You okay?”
Ianto sighed. “Yeah.”
“Fail.”
“What?” Ianto asked, obviously confused.
“You’re not okay. You’re sitting on the floor and moping. Why can’t you just say it?”
Ianto glared at Jamie. “Just how much did Brendan tell you?”
“Enough.” Jamie put his arm around Ianto pulled him close. “But nothing I didn’t already know.”
Ianto sighed again and let his head rest on Jamie’s shoulder. “I’m not okay. Happy now?”
Jamie huffed out an exasperated sigh. “No, I’m not happy. You’re miserable, how can I be happy?”
“This is why I didn’t want to bother you with this… mess. It’s bad enough that I feel like this, no need to spread it around.”
Jamie sat quietly for another long moment. “Berk,” he said teasingly with another nudge.
“Hey!”
“Plonker.”
“Jamie!”
“So what’s the deal with you and Brendan?” Jamie asked.
Ianto rolled his eyes and got up, reaching down to pull Jamie off the floor as well. “Come on, Smith. Lunch.”
“You’re suggesting food? Who are you and what have you done with Ianto?”
“You want lunch or not?” Ianto asked.
“Yeah, Jones,” Jamie laughed, grabbing Ianto in a quick hug. “Sounds good.”
TBC in Chapter Thirty