I'm tired but I can't seem to find the need for bed. It's almost one in the morning and I have to need to stay up this late on a Friday evening when I've done nothing but listen to GaGa, browse ONTD, and work on a new icon or two. I was hoping to go out with someone from home but they're all busy tonight (well all two of them). I feel like a lame ( Read more... )

Alisa is still trying to talk to me. I don't get why the girl doesn't understand we're not friends anymore therefore we don't talk. And she's telling me I need to grow up because I won't write her back. How does that have anything to do with needing to grow up? I think she's the one that needs to grow up after she IMed me today saying "He wasn't ( Read more... )

Here I am at twenty-one. Nothing new or exciting except for the fact that I can buy alcohol now. I don't feel any older than before. My birthday didn't even feel like my birthday because I celebrated the day before with my family. This weekend is the big thing at the bar. Maybe it'll feel more like something then? I don't know. We'll see ( Read more... )

I always get my hopes up just to have them come crashing down. =(

I JUST WANT TO BE HAPPY!

I'm constantly living in the past and the future. I'm constantly reflecting on how I could have done things differently in California or how I wish I wasn't so shy when Matt and I dated. I think about my brother and my best friend who both broke up with their significant others of 3+ years and the good times I shared with them. I think about how I' ( Read more... )

I feel like I was whining in my last entry. I reminded myself of at 15 year-old self again. I shouldn't. I'm 20 now.

I think I just got my hopes up as usual. It's not often I find a guy so when I do I tend to jump into things quickly and to hope too soon. As I said before, I feel like I'm just trying to find someone to fill what Matt left behind.

I ( Read more... )

He's seeing someone now. That's why he hasn't been talking to me or seemed uninterested. What the fuck? I thought he liked me and was interested. Why did he chose this girl and not me? I don't understand. Whatever. She goes to Columbia so she's obviously smarter than me. That's probably why. Whatever. It sucks but I'll get over it. I just wish I ( Read more... )

I'm trying to be a good friend but it hurts so fucking much. :(

I'm becoming homesick. :/