(Untitled)

[blitzen_]

last night it occurred to me that a person whom i regard as a particularly excellent, close friend of mine, whom i drop things for if they need help, and try to be there as much as i can

Comments

[athystle]

I'm very sorry to hear your mom passed. I lost both my parents,my dad in 96 and my mom two years ago. I know exactly how you feel. I'm not sure why some people whom you are close to seem to have nothing to say when you need it most. I dealt with this same thing with many of my friends. Maybe they just don't know what to say and so say nothing. It's hard when you aren't hearing any support from those whom you would expect to. I was a bit mad too but had to let that wear off. It isn't productive to be mad either.I do not know why it happens this way. I'm sure it makes us stronger,anyway,just wanted to say I'm sorry for your loss and know what you're talking about.I think losing a parent is indeed a big deal and you should not have to express a need for condolences at all. How strange life and death can be.

[penella22]

I agree with you completely that our culture here in the U.S. (and I'm guessing over there in Australia) is completely messed up around death. I think people get so overwhelmed by how big a loss that is that they are too scared to even mention it. Then it becomes the elephant in the room. If only people would have the courage to say something as simple as "I'm sorry for your loss" then at least the person grieving wouldn't have to feel so invisible. I'm sorry some of your closer friends don't know how to deal with it. Maybe you can help them by letting them know you need to be able to talk about it with people, not just keep it locked up in a vault. But sometimes people just can't handle it period. Its too...messy...for them. :-( I'm glad you've also had the feed-you-comfort- you-console-you friends too