Weatherby tries to stop this download in what's supposed to be a tense race against time. It isn't. He’s typing away furiously while it looks like poor Britney-Helena’s eyes have gone glazed from all the flashing lights and over stimulation ( Read more... )

Max thinks the code to steal the hundred million dollars on the island is “Helena”. Yeah, and the code for stealing milk from babies is “Waagh”. Christie calls him out for being an idiot and wisely takes over the operation. Meanwhile, we see that Weatherby is spying on Britney-Helena from behind a pole. Weatherby you know the rules, no harassing ( Read more... )

Moving on, some chick who’s a dead ringer for Britney Spears is rollerblading somewhere and telling us what DOA is in voiceover. Telling us that it’s the world’s “greatest” martial arts tournament. In what sense? In what way is it better than boxing or MMA ultimate fighting? Tournament, that’s all she says, no twists, no gimmicks to make it unique ( Read more... )

DOA is worse than an Uwe Boll film. All his films ( Read more... )