All the stories you hold. All the times I was manic, depressed, suicidal… all the times I had no one to talk to. All the times I just wished I was somewhere else, someone else, or nonexistent. Here is to 21 years of some of my struggles being journaled onto this digital diary. May no one ever read these. May no one ever feel the ways I have felt. ( Read more... )

What do you do when you’re left without words and can’t recognize what you’re truly feeling?

I’m trying to function normally today, but I can’t stop crying. I have work in half an hour and I’m sobbing in my room.

Will this ever change?

Isn’t it wild how we can go from total interest to diving into nothing and total silence in the span of a few days. Seems like all the men I meet are ghosts pretending to be living beings, just waiting to play a game of peekaboo only coming around when they need a boost of confidence. I’m tired. It’s exhausting to let yourself be vulnerable in the ( Read more... )

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I wanna evaporate into the air and disappear once I hit the atmosphere.

- a lesson to be learned.

Just like that, almost like a season, you came and went. Like a harsh winter. Beautiful to see and harsh to feel.

Lesson learned.

It’s been a while, you’ve forgotten how to be wild. But you’ll take those risks and hope things work or if they don’t you will hope that at least it’ll be a somewhat painless, clean cut farewell.
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- yeah don’t destroy yourself like those cowards do.


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She hurts me.

Or maybe I hurt myself disguised as my mother.

And then I feel guilty.

Then I feel sorry for her.

I’m to blame.